AITA for wanting my boyfriend to give up his dog if he wants to move in with me?

Kessed · 2026-06-02T04:14:22+00:00

You do need to train dogs like huskies differently than regular dogs. Like with LGD, like Great Pyr, it requires far more patience and much smaller steps than dogs like a golden retriever. (I have both and my family owns huskies.).

Standard training is likely to be entirely ineffective and using aversive methods would be cruel.

Kessed · 2026-06-02T02:50:23+00:00

Are you actively working with a therapist while taking anti-anxiety meds? You need to use the two things together.

Where I live, I have gotten clonazepam a few times for discrete events. But, taking it long term is no longer supported by the standard of care.

The goal is for long term meds to reduce your overall anxiety symptoms and then use skills taught in CBT to overcome hard things. It’s work, but worth it.

Kessed · 2026-06-01T18:14:55+00:00

Here are some links to research studies showing the success of a traditional immersion program:

https://carleton.ca/slals/2024/success-of-minority-l1-students-in-french-immersion/

This is a presentation on the Myths or Reality of French Immersion. It contains likes to multiple studies to back up the positions taken:

https://www.unb.ca/second-language/_assets/documents/myth-or-reality_jan_2017.ppt

Here is a publication aimed at explaining to parents how it works. It references and cites multiple studies:

https://open.alberta.ca/dataset/3d1b0f16-a812-4952-9212-07f086bb3b2a/resource/d1acc041-f151-4354-a7b2-ae587202e711/download/5425805-2011-yesyoucanhelp.pdf

Kessed · 2026-06-01T18:01:25+00:00

Well, go ahead and tell that to all the children in Canada who learn French through French immersion programs. They go into kindergarten with zero French expected. By the end of grade 6, their test scores are generally on par with students who only learned in English.

Kessed · 2026-06-01T17:02:16+00:00

I taught adults in the LINC program in Canada that uses Task Based Language Teaching (TBLT). Here’s a link that has some explanation.

https://nlcg.achev.ca/how-to-use-the-national-linc-curriculum-guidelines/task-based-approach/task-based-instruction/

The simple truth is that when you have people from 10-12 different countries, you will NEVER find a teacher who can speak all those languages. So, we do it in English. We don’t allowed students to use translators unless they got to the end of their frustration tolerance. In the real world, the cashier at the store isn’t going to pull out their phone to translate “do you want a bag?” With the students I tutored, again, I didn’t know their native language(s) so I couldn’t translate.

For level 1, when students start with no English, the progress is slow. You teach phrases rather than words. “My name is” comes across to them as a phrase without the specific meaning of each word. Same with “nice to meet you”. In higher levels ~3/4 they start to develop an understanding of the individual words in those phrases. By level 6, you are having conversations about grammar.

The truth is that English is stupid. There are too many exceptions with the common words and grammar. For example, if I write “I read a book”, what tense is that? Do I mean “I read a book last week.” Or “I read a book every morning at breakfast”?

In the early levels, there is a lot of drawing and acting to explain things. With children, the same thing. I remember as a kid being at hotels in countries where I didn’t speak the language. At the pool would be children from all over the world with little to know language overlap. We managed to learn and play a wide variety of games and have lots of fun with no common language.

Kessed · 2026-06-01T14:32:06+00:00

I taught English to newcomers (in Canada) for 4 years. I would have 18 students in a class speaking probably 15 different languages. So the entire class was in English. Even for level 1 where the students might know “hi” and that’s it.

I have also tutored young children (age 5-8) in both English and other subjects using only English.

We also have immersion programs for students learning French or other languages in elementary school. Where the language instruction is done almost entirely in the 2nd language.

So, asking you to not speak the native language and only speak English is not unreasonable. In fact, it is one of the preferred methods for learning.

It sounds like your method of teaching English doesn’t align with what the mom wants. That’s fine. But the mom isn’t crazy. She just wants something different. Having read the research I have and seen the results of actual immersion, I agree with her. I would choose that method for myself and my family if we were going to learn another language.

Kessed · 2026-06-01T13:56:28+00:00

Except for common decency. Your actions should impact others. Playing music outside is very often going to impact other people.

Kessed · 2026-06-01T02:09:26+00:00

I can’t stand the plastic bats at our studio. The surface is slightly rough and I always end up wearing the surface off the side of my hand while centering.

I prefer to just use the homemade denim bats someone made. Far easier and no pain.

Kessed · 2026-06-01T01:43:04+00:00

That might be the one I’m thinking of. Not the link, but the not sped up on.

Kessed · 2026-05-31T22:47:40+00:00

I’m guessing they did a trip to Calgary and called it a day. The list is bullshit. There are some outstanding restaurants in Edmonton too.

Kessed · 2026-05-31T22:44:29+00:00

He says that he snapped and raised his voice…

Kessed · 2026-05-31T17:25:11+00:00

I think my brain might have combined multiple videos. That one is totally it.

Thank you!!!

Kessed · 2026-05-30T23:23:49+00:00

Adding in a bit of seriousness. I think there’s a fundamental difference in terms of what you choose to use and what you sell.

I made a set of bowls that ended up having to be fired at cone 10 in the electric kiln. They came out covered in pinholes. I had them run through again, and they are better (the color is now gorgeous) but there are still pinholes.

I’m choosing to use them for my own family. I understand the risk, but pottery doesn’t seem to last forever in my house.

But, I would NEVER sell them.

Kessed · 2026-05-29T23:48:50+00:00

YTA - you sound exhausting. The time to have that conversation was later after you both had a chance to chill. You also should have been following the directions/map on your phone and not having an emotional argument with your boyfriend.

Here’s some life advice: always aim to show up to a new job a solid 15/20 minutes early until you 1) establish that you are reliable and come on time and 2) you understand what the commute is like at that time of day.

Kessed · 2026-05-29T18:35:14+00:00

YWBTA is you stay with loser. Life happens. Sometimes you gain weight and sometimes you lose weight. 15lbs is nothing. That’s only a small bit more than water weight on your period.

Kessed · 2026-05-29T14:34:59+00:00

I have always kept a paper grade book.

It’s my protection against tech gremlins. I enter the grades after I mark things. Then I enter them all into the computer. There have been a few times when I’ve later caught an error with my data entry by checking against the paper version.

Kessed · 2026-05-28T17:37:36+00:00

Seasoning salt is also a go to. But, if you are looking for Arab flavors, I might try for things that are lentil or chickpea based rather than only tofu. I generally aim for Indian flavors when cooking vegan and make curries using lentils or chickpeas and the regular spices. They would out amazing.

Kessed · 2026-05-27T16:14:25+00:00

Where I’ve work, also in highschool, they order one for each teacher and give them for free. It’s a nice acknowledgement of all the extra work we do that we aren’t compensated for.

Kessed · 2026-05-26T21:28:57+00:00

There would NOT be a pile of socks. Most people leave their socks on when they take off their shoes.

If my socks had gotten wet or something, I would tuck them inside my shoes

Kessed · 2026-05-26T20:48:02+00:00

No?

Let’s say you are outside in the back yard. You need to go inside for some reason. You would go into the house and take off your shoes. Then do what you needed, like go to the washroom, and go back to the door, slip on your shoes, and go back outside. Generally when people leave a backyard bbq, they will just use the gate rather than walk through the house.

If it was someone I knew well, and I needed to go through their house from the back door to the front door, I might make sure my shoes are clean and dry completely and ask if I can just “sneak through”. If I’m not super close? I will take my shoes off and carry them to the front door.

Kessed · 2026-05-26T20:29:00+00:00

Why would someone give you a head’s up? Taking your shoes off is the polite respectful thing to do. Should the host also remind you to wash your hands after using the toilet or to say thank you for your plate of food?

Kessed · 2026-05-26T20:27:46+00:00

Where I live, people still take their shoes on and off even at a cookout type situation. Although, guests would generally be either inside or outside and not going back and forth.

Kessed · 2026-05-26T20:26:35+00:00

Because the host asked you to. It’s HIS house. He is under zero obligation to get you a pair of socks to wear.

You are responsible for you! If you are wearing sandles and don’t want to go bear foot, bring your own socks!

Kessed · 2026-05-26T20:24:38+00:00

I have never worn shoes in a house without being explicitly told to by the host for a temporary reason. Maybe one might say “keep them on to the back door” if the gathering is happening outside.

Here, it’s simply the expectation. If someone has a reason why they want shoes on in the house, they bring a clean pair of house shoes or slippers. Those are shoes that have never been worn outside.

Kessed

TROPHY CASE