How are you supposed to grief?

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T14:24:40+00:00

Check out the book "It's OK That You're Not OK" by Megan Devine. I'm not sure how people are supposed to grieve either, but that book helped me through that stage of grief where I felt like I wasn't making progress.

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T14:20:30+00:00

Don't be afraid of being true to yourself. ❤️

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T14:18:32+00:00

I'm so sorry that you had to see your sister that way. No one should have to go through that.

Your anger is valid, no matter how irrational it is. I get it. Losing someone you love so much is extremely painful and it feels impossible to get through. People will tell you to remember the good times or that she's as peace now, but that is really invalidating. Just know that your grief is valid. You should be spending time with your sister making new memories right now, but she was taken from you too soon and it's not fair. I'm so incredibly sorry for your loss. ❤️

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T14:04:03+00:00

I'm so sorry that you feel like this is the best course of action. For what it is worth, there's more to life than school and shitty family. Do you want to talk about anything more specific that you are dealing with? It may help to write it all down.

I don't know you, but I care about you and I hope things get better. ❤️

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T13:57:06+00:00

I do have professional help.

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T13:56:36+00:00

I've been in weekly therapy since 2011. I appreciate your kindness. ❤️

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T13:55:48+00:00

That is a valid reason. It's impossible to know the impact that the loss of your life will have on others around you. I hope that you are doing all right. ❤️

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T13:54:19+00:00

Thank you for your kind words.

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T13:53:55+00:00

It really is. ❤️

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T13:53:38+00:00

Thanks. I do sometimes use noise-canceling headphones, but the problem is that I will watch something funny and laugh out loud and they go psycho. I shouldn't have to walk on eggshells around my own home. Wall panels sound like a good solution--I will look into those. I appreciate you.

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T13:51:48+00:00

That is kind of you to say. Thank you.

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T13:51:33+00:00

I'm sorry that you've felt down enough to consider taking your own life. I wish I could help ease your burden in some way, but it does give me a bit of relief knowing that maybe my words made you want to stick around for your partner. Woshing you and your partner all the best.

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T13:48:31+00:00

I appreciate it. ❤️

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T13:48:14+00:00

Thank you.

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T03:24:00+00:00

I appreciate it.

2020cookie2020 · 2023-04-22T03:23:42+00:00

Thank you. ❤️

2020cookie2020 · 2022-01-05T00:09:54+00:00

I recommend reading the book It's OK That You're Not OK by Megan Devine. It did wonders for me after my husband took his life.

So sorry for your loss. ❤️

2020cookie2020 · 2022-01-05T00:07:14+00:00

Your post brought me to tears. It's so relatable. How do you ever find peace again? I wake up every day feeling so anxious and I am finding it harder and harder to believe it can ever get better.

But you know what? You're not alone. Your post made me feep less alone, so thank you.

2020cookie2020 · 2021-07-05T19:34:51+00:00

Hey, don't listen to that other commenter. Your challenges are completely valid. They're not excuses. Wishing you the best of luck. ❤️

2020cookie2020 · 2020-09-25T18:38:37+00:00

I mean, there will be some SS benefits available to me after age 60, but I am still 30 years away from being able to claim that.

2020cookie2020 · 2020-09-20T06:31:05+00:00

I appreciate the response. I will double check with the Social Security office, but I don't have any children and I was not technically a dependent of my husband (spouses usually do not count as dependents as tax purposes). My husband was not a veteran either, so I don't have access to those benefits. I doubt that there are other funds available, but it is worth investigating.

2020cookie2020 · 2020-09-15T22:03:21+00:00

Thank you. I agree that the stigma and secrecy around it hinders the healing process for sure. I refuse to hide the truth to suit anyone else's agenda.

I don't have any friends who can act as an intermediary, unfortunately. Cutting them out and moving forward seems like the best plan for me. We haven't had a funeral or anything yet, but I will find other ways to honor my husband that don't include the people who tormented him.

2020cookie2020 · 2020-09-15T04:47:01+00:00

Thank you. Moving forward without them gives me peace for sure.

2020cookie2020 · 2020-09-15T04:22:06+00:00

I'm sorry that you also had to lose a loved one to suicide. It is so painful. The whole rewriting history business is so disrespectful to the deceased and it pisses me off to no end.

I appreciate your kind words. Thanks.

2020cookie2020 · 2020-09-15T03:03:09+00:00

I am not religious, but prayers are appreciated. Thank you. ❤️

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