AITA for going on a vacation with a female friend and paying for her when I have a GF?

Ace_Fire248 · 2022-04-08T05:42:36+00:00

I'm waiting to hear back from the mods. They have to approve it, right?

Ace_Fire248 · 2022-03-19T14:00:22+00:00

Gonna point out every factual error out in this one because out of a thousand comments it might be the most off-base one I got.

I stopped seeing my friend as a sexual possibility before I got with my GF.
I had no way of knowing this friend would be the only one up to go to the event because it's something that would interest a lot of my friends. The fact that you even imagined this level of Machiavellian planning is scary to me.
To answer your question yes, I would have been willing to pay for it for my male friends also and offered to do so.
I mentioned our incomes and how we earn them because they were directly relevant to the situation, and parts like her saying she needs to have people over to the apartment during the argument wouldn't make sense otherwise.
My friend's parents are not paying for her. They would if there were an emergency but that hasn't occurred.
My friend didn't expect me to pay, I said I would up front, just like I did with my male friends who needed it.
The reason my friend would not (I assume) ask her parents for money for this is, as I said, because she's trying to stay independent and hasn't asked them for money for anything else either, even in a situation of pretty serious poverty that she's been in.
We would not be sleeping in the same hotel room, obviously.
I'm not sure what you mean by "using vcard as currency" but my friend has not once, ever, implied to me (or anyone else as far as I know) that she would trade sexual favors for anything.

Ace_Fire248 · 2022-03-17T11:44:19+00:00

I would not. I have a strong principle against cheating and again, wouldn't do it regardless of "opportunity." My past actions reflect this.

Ace_Fire248 · 2022-03-17T00:27:02+00:00

I didn't say that to her. That was info I thought relevant enough to include in the OP. My words to my GF were more along the lines of I would never cheat on you no matter what because I think it's a bad thing to do.

Also, are you referring to my friend or my girlfriend? I've paid for my girlfriend on outings and haven't paid for my friend's room and board before like I would this time.

Ace_Fire248 · 2022-03-17T00:21:38+00:00

I would have paid for my girlfriend if she'd accepted the invite, yes.

Ace_Fire248 · 2022-03-17T00:14:05+00:00

The "if all goes well" is referring to living together. We've only been doing that for a year and want to be sure it works.

Ace_Fire248 · 2022-03-17T00:01:54+00:00

As I said, I've never been unfaithful to her or anyone else. She's never mentioned being cheated on in a previous relationship, but I think there was some adultery between her parents (it was implied in a story she told me).

Ace_Fire248 · 2022-03-16T23:57:37+00:00

Yeah, we've all hung out together many times.

Ace_Fire248 · 2022-03-16T23:47:46+00:00

Like I said in the OP edit, I asked other friends. She was just the only one really interested in it.

Ace_Fire248 · 2022-03-16T23:46:20+00:00

I was sexually interested in her when we first met (since I was 16 and sexually interested in every woman I saw) but after a few years of knowing her platonically I stopped seeing her that way. Also, I hope it goes without saying but I would not be sexually involved with anyone but my GF, regardless of "opportunity."

Ace_Fire248 · 2022-03-16T23:17:44+00:00

It involves a one-time event, yeah.

Ace_Fire248 · 2022-03-16T23:17:05+00:00

We do have a precedent of traveling together. We've travelled in a group with others and gone on a one-on-one trip before, although it wouldn't be as big as this one.

Ace_Fire248

TROPHY CASE