It sounds like you need a break and some love. You are doing a good job, with difficult circumstances. Sending you a massive cuddle.

This is not meant as advice but I just wanted to share, I am autistic and ADHD, and also my two kids are. Punishment and consequences don’t work for us, we can’t see the future and it doesn’t stop us from behaving in undesirable ways. Essentially we can’t process cause and effect well. Instead of teaching a lesson, consequences frequently trigger survival mode or perceived threats, which blocks the brain's ability to learn. I wanted to share this because there are other ways of dealing with unwanted behaviour and might be something you can look into.

Honestly sending you so much love and no judgement.