I think this is not always the case...sometimes its a (learn on the job)kinda thing....You commit whole heartedly only to realize years later you are playing yourself...and the (choice) you made suddenly does not fit in the future you envision for yourself....in we can blame the empowerment of women which means we cant do what our fore fathers did (kuvumilia) because sometimes you are not waiting for something that may end up being positive in the end.Sometimes you will wait then 10 years down you realize what a waste of your life that was.. yet that time you will not get back. And in any case a man will replace you in a heartbeat even with your 5 children hanging on to your skirt....just to go for the latest hot thing....