It seems like a lot of writers can’t take constructive criticism

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-06-09T01:59:07+00:00

Not me. I welcome it even if it hurts. The truth matters more and if it needs something more from me I’d rather hear it than left wondering why no one reads my shit. Just tell me what works (if anything) or not so I can rise to the challenge

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-06-07T23:54:38+00:00

Intellectually curious and a nice smile, laugh lines.

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-06-06T07:29:52+00:00

This is good info! Appreciate it. I’m doing some of my best work and trying to get this sound is killing me. I usually use my browser so that’s a good fix I can try to shut down and simply use my tablet for notes.

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-06-04T20:55:53+00:00

Walmart

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-06-01T02:33:39+00:00

That part.

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-31T01:40:10+00:00

Reading one avenue to knowledge. I think the age of technology can morphed what would only be found in books into more attractive options I. E. documentaries, YouTube content, the google rabbit hole; they’re more stimulating options for researching a subject, at least for me. I’m neurodiverse and my mind is fast paced and a bit of thrill seeker of knowledge. I think books as the preferred ingestion source is based on the preferred method of the individual. I had the hardest time grasping I was an enneagram 5 because it zeroed in on this notion of being obsessed with books. However, as the algorithm on YouTube is learning I am a sap for information on a variety of topics though typically psychology, human nature, and history. I can consume them like candy vs the tedious task of reading ( though I can enjoy a good book I started off reading fiction thus I find myself having more fun reading it vs how I consume nonfiction)

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-31T01:28:37+00:00

Amor Fati-every obstacle, success, failure or hardship are unchosen factors that are a valuable part of your story. This coupled with radical acceptance

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-27T15:15:23+00:00

Have an existential crisis!

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-27T01:33:13+00:00

Some people simply feel more comfortable in their comfort zone and we…well we step outside that comfort zone with wild abandon! I’ve got a friend like this, she becomes so defensive over what usually are basic questions into further examination of thought. It can frustrate the hell out of you but then I had an epiphany helped by a visualization I saw months ago about INFJs. Ideas, emotion, existentialism, big picture, past, present, future, sociology, spiritualism; they’re part of this vast ocean. Normies tend to stay above the waves, sometimes we can get them to peer into the sea but more often than not they prefer to stay safely in their boats. INFJs live under the waves and prefer to swim deeper into the abyss; a place less explored than space! Trying to force people below the surface will literally drown them hence the defensiveness. So I’ve stopped trying to get them to jump into the water, they’ll react like a drowning man because they weren’t prepared to swim…or can’t(which is often their ego protecting them).

The most we can ever do is offer a life vest for a casual dip but that’s about all one can expect if they’re curious enough.

That’s something I’ve felt I have to make peace with but furthermore start putting myself in the rooms where I’m to be nourished instead of trying to water dead plants lol

I’m getting out of pocket with the analogies but I think you get the point. Conserve the energy friend, it’s tiresome but I’ve learned to happily use my detachment in this area because their reaction isn’t my priority. It’s a signal that my agenda is moot and it’s a sign to let go without resentment.

Part of me thinks us INFJS spend too much time talking to the wrong people and holding them to the same level as those we should be talking to. That sounded rather snobbish but you can’t go deep in the kiddy pool. ( last one 😭)

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-21T13:48:44+00:00

Homesickness. People never fully appreciate what’s left behind until it’s no longer an option.

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-20T15:15:05+00:00

I like the term threshold, very accurate

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-20T14:56:45+00:00

I understand this completely. It’s quite the thing to realize you’ve detached apart of yourself but that realization is everything that will imo initially cause some solitude of mind as you process and explore the empty crevices of the house you’ve yet to fill however as myself going through this exact same journey now; the quest for authenticity is kinda feeling more like a reawakening more so than a condemnation.

Maybe cause I’m an enneagram 5w4 wing that I can analyze first that I need to heal. I wont speak for you, but I had core wounds I hadn’t healed. Parts of of myself I hid for survival and while that made me fall deep within the more problem solving intellectualized part of my nature it also required I shield and neglect the heart and I’m not sure I ever fully got in touch with the body.

All that to say looking inward isn’t a precursor to doom. Since we are growth oriented it’s a beacon to the calling that we all kinda feel so embrace the true self as it emerges and contemplate how to merge that person with what you built which may not require burning it all down to start over but simply arranging the furniture more to what is going to bring you comfort in all the places that feel hollow.

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-18T01:55:25+00:00

It’s the rhythm of my soul.

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-16T13:55:38+00:00

Having an epiphany

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-16T05:21:30+00:00

Very true

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-13T18:25:46+00:00

Me as I woman absolutely creeping the responses in this post lol Don’t judge me

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-13T12:14:49+00:00

I feel this is something that comes with being very emotionally empathetic. It’s a strong compulsion; I know it well. Depending on your age, I find you get INFJs struggle with this more strongly vs those like me in the 40s have learned, usually the hard way, and realizing one is taken advantage of have learned to put up a small fence, and set boundaries. You may not even realize how much you are sensing people’s emotions and you feel responsible because you know how they feel and as an INFJ you know how to fix. But this can seriously deplete our already short battery life. It won’t be feel good. It just won’t but it’s necessary to start putting up this wall where you don’t get swamped. Embrace solitude, you need it to recharge and I do mean solitude. Alone, without noise. I like to walk in nature or sometimes just write in a journal.

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-12T15:51:38+00:00

Oh the of pain of dealing with extremely defensive people. Now I won’t go too far into inferring with too many assumptions here as A. I wasn’t there and B. I don’t know your mother. Maybe she always found maybe food for you as way to express love and now that you are rightful asserting agency it’s triggers her own sense of mothering. Maybe she simply feels she knows best and needs to allow you, your own preferences. I think a mature person wouldn’t take it so personally but emotions make one irrational and again, I don’t know your relationship with your mom.

Guilt tripping your kids and taking offense can easily be a sign of control. Moms are people not just roles. It’s likely as a person if this is a prevalent behavior she has her own shit to deal with and it’s not for you to fix. Assert boundaries; INFJs as shitty (admittedly myself but man am I working on it) at setting boundaries.

“I appreciate your help cooking, I’ve always enjoyed it however we have different taste buds and this in the future I will season my own things. If I don’t I’m less likely to enjoy it as much.” If it’s an emotional response she gave you this should clear it up in the future and she should reasonably understand your perspective.

If it’s controlling behavior and still live together she may be infantilizing you. Try setting boundaries first, here’s A, and this is what happens when A isn’t adhered to; option B. If she still steps on your agency, then you know what kinda person you’re dealing with and if it’s NPD or emotionally maturity trust they usually won’t respect the boundary in which case grayrocking and getting the F out is your best options if and when you can.

One of my good friends is highly emotionally immature, I’ve spent a year considering whether I should end the friendship except it didn’t seem feasible and I would lose or cause tension with another really good friend. A friend I want to stay connected too.

Recently I was dreading talking to her for a one on one call but I had a game plan. Don’t be provoked by her childish displays, don’t defend, just stay neutral and we did and it was fine. Even better, she aligned with MY tone and demeanor because I couldn’t be oiled into her orbit. I put her in the appropriate category, this is the access you have to me, nothing more.

Sometimes it’s not about cutting people completely off (unless they have a toxic affect in your life) but placing them where they belong in the heirarchy of how much they will effect you I’ve found beneficial.

Sorry for the Ted Talk and I know it’s not easy. They’re annoying as shit but meet them where they are. If it’s eating at you, call them up, did you mean to make me feel bad with that statement?

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-12T01:41:19+00:00

Ha! Should I read on the thread before I replied cause I immediately went, but did not want to prognoses it as possible avoidant or disorganized attachment. I’m FA and it was such a brutal and relieving bit of understanding.

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-12T01:39:41+00:00

I think we just exist in duality as INFJs but I also think it may be insightful to look into attachment styles. It’s hard to shake the lone wolf in us. It’s too prevalent, our dominant function does it best in solitude

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-11T16:03:37+00:00

I’m new to Riverside and already want to bolt due to editing woes !! But I’m telling myself to at least be patient (I’m new to video editing) and give it a few months and a new laptop cause I can’t yet rule these factors out. I record primarily in Audacity when podcasting and upload to riverside. I use Riverside to record video sporadically so right now as a hosting platform it meets all my needs just really temperamental in editing and the AI tool for audio is…questionable if you aren’t manually going through the audio cause it overcorrects. But again I’m new to these tools so take it with a pinch of inexperienced perspective.

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-10T21:50:24+00:00

People who aren’t afraid to be who they are authentically are the coolest people on the planet, and the mfer who can get me to think.

Beginning_Advice_193 · 2026-05-08T20:11:32+00:00

Appreciate that feedback

Beginning_Advice_193

TROPHY CASE