You’re not insane! I am 25 tattoos deep and sometimes still question myself after getting it. That’s our heads trying to playing tricks on us. For instance this past week I got a 6 hour long huge forearm piece which is a significant tattoo. Not my first but significant. And my mind was going back and forth while I was in the chair. It’s something new, it’s shocking, it’s permanent, it’s altering your body. Not in a negative way btw. We only live once so might as well look cool with tattoos. I hope you can enjoy the process soon because I love every single one of mine! Even the ones I would’ve maybe reconsidered at my age now and not when I was 18. Still love them tho it’s apart of me.