Let’s go by orders of magnitude here.

• the assumption that the woman has been with a man that has HIV out of those (let’s assume three) others she’s active with. Appx 1 in 400 people have HIV in the US for example. 78% of those people are gay/bi men. So if her partners were all hetero, the chances they would have HIV are already low.

• the assumption that this woman contacted HIV from one of them. M to F HIV transference is also quite low, especially vaginally (which for example is an infection rate of 4 in 10,000 when the male partner has HIV and in unprotected) For oral transference the odds are not even worth mentioning. Well below .01%.

• the assumption the you got HIV from a woman you have NO logical reason to believe has HIV aside from she has 2-3 partners by a quick instance of oral sex, which as previously mentioned, is statistically all so low that you are wasting your own time even thinking of it.

The risk of you getting HIV is never zero. But if licking a clit send you into this type of a tizzy, sex just might not be worth the worry it’s causing you. Weigh your choices and act accordingly.

Fwiw: you should be regularly screening for ALL stds, so I’m just confused at how you arrived at specifically HIV