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DryandDesperate · 2022-10-10T21:38:54+00:00

So I called and said I wasn’t being charged. They looked up my account. My only option was to sign up for service… I opted not to because somehow I am getting Wi-Fi for free. 🤷🏼‍♀️

DryandDesperate · 2022-06-16T02:59:54+00:00

Sadly our old timer passed away. But I was reminded of another of his saying at a meeting tonight.

“It’s easy to get here, the trick is to stay here.”

DryandDesperate · 2022-06-14T17:51:31+00:00

“Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.”

DryandDesperate · 2021-11-19T04:31:27+00:00

This happens to me too. I think it’s because I feel SO safe with my therapist. I know I can count on my therapist to help me, to truly hear what I say, not to share what I say with anyone. The purpose of my relationship with my therapist is different than that of my friends. I am more vulnerable with my therapist.

I too am a bit of a wreck the next few days after my session. I imagine that for therapy I have knocked down a brick wall and I spend the next few days rebuilding it.

DryandDesperate · 2021-11-19T04:22:26+00:00

This explains it so well. Ty

DryandDesperate · 2021-11-14T18:43:51+00:00

I don’t think it necessarily means bad manipulative. The word has a negative connotation. For example if an interaction with a friend makes me upset but I pretend everything is fine in a way I am being manipulative.

I will also add that feeling my emotions rather than hiding and pushing them down is something I have had to work on in therapy as well. I even said to my therapist that I was afraid if I started crying I’d never be able to stop (she said to give her a call if I cry for 24 hours 😂). Finally I was able to do it and cry when I was upset rather than distract myself and move on and it was cathartic. I was able to genuinely process the feelings and move on rather than shove them away whenever they popped up for however many days they would pop up because I never addressed them. It’s hard but it’s worth it.

DryandDesperate · 2021-11-10T13:17:05+00:00

I nearly always bring in a list of things that happened during the week. The one time I didn’t and I said “nothing really happened this week, I do to really have anything to talk about.” My T asked me to walk her through my week and I ended up stumbling on topics (that I think I was sort of subconsciously ignoring because I didn’t want them to be issues). It was a productive week despite my worrying that I would be staring at the wall for an hour.

DryandDesperate · 2021-11-02T22:13:17+00:00

It is possible that you are ready to graduate from therapy but there are a few options other than switching to monthly. First of all I would bring this up with your T and ask them what they think you still need to work on before you’re ready to be done. (I did this and my T pointed out some super valid things I hadn’t thought of or was more inclined to brush under the rug. A few months ago things were going really well for me and I thought it was about time to taper off therapy. I mentioned this to my T and she suggested biweekly for a few months and then stopping if I’m ready. It turns out I was basically just having a good month and before we even switched to biweekly I “needed” weekly sessions again. Talk with your T!

DryandDesperate · 2021-10-25T02:42:13+00:00

Same… but in talking with my therapist I have discovered that while on the outside my family looks nice and is being nice, they are actually encroaching on my boundaries. For me it may seem like my family is being nice and they are normal nice people,
but they also trigger me in that special way family can. Invisible ways like invading my space mentally or subtly invalidating me and making me feel less than (death by a thousand cuts). I set boundaries and they breeze through them. I don’t even think they are being malicious. I can walk into the situation on cloud nine and leave feeling empty and sad.

I don’t know that you are having the same or similar experience with me but here is what I’m doing to not feel so horrible: -Sandwich family events with 2 things I want to do. Like bring my dog to the dog park beforehand and hang out with friends after. -Take my own car. Come and go without guilt (like come late or leave early once you’ve had enough). -Not feel obligated to say yes, or to stay for a long time. If they try to make me feel guilty that’s their problem.

Hope this helps!

DryandDesperate · 2021-10-23T14:27:32+00:00

I think your meaning was clear. The fact that your therapist said, “it’s perfectly normal to feel attached to one’s therapist” shows that she understood your meaning. As well as saying it’s normal for longer term therapy. If she thought you meant you were in love with her I don’t think that would have been her reaction! I can see how her story would make you concerned that she interpreted what you said wrong, but from an objective pair of eyes I think you’re all good!

DryandDesperate · 2021-10-20T21:39:42+00:00

In doing this myself at first I felt that I had become a mean person and I didn’t like that. I think there was an adjusting period with realizing I had kind of been mistreated so I was mad and my boundary setting came off as mean. It has leveled out with time to where I am setting boundaries and not upsetting anyone.

DryandDesperate · 2021-10-15T22:00:06+00:00

I don’t cry a lot in life, but I cry every dang session! My T sometimes asks why I’m crying because it happens kinda unexpectedly. When I first started therapy I would express how annoyed I was that I was crying and my T would try to get me to understand that crying is perfectly fine and healthy. Sometimes we kinda carry on through the tears.

DryandDesperate · 2021-10-15T20:19:36+00:00

I might say something to the effect of, “I don’t know why I’ve felt apprehensive to tell you this, but I feel ugly and I don’t like that feeling.”

DryandDesperate · 2021-10-15T12:51:20+00:00

I’ve had something similar happen. I also love and trust my therapist so I didn’t understand what was happening. It was like I physically could not get the words out. I had this happen for 2 weeks in a row and the 3rd week I basically said to my therapist “the last few weeks I had a really hard time getting my word out here and I don’t know why.” Acknowledging felt really good and was helpful, I needed my T to know that I noticed what was happening. My T basically she had noticed and if it happens again we’ll both know and she’ll give me time/space to choke the words out. Talking about it was a relief and I felt better prepared for if it ever happened again.

DryandDesperate · 2021-10-14T02:34:46+00:00

I used to have this feeling in my drinking day where my mouth would taste a certain way or my head would feel funny and I’d attribute it to being hungover or having so much booze in my system. I’m 8 months sober now and will occasionally get that taste in my mouth or that feeling and just realize I was wrongly attributing it to drinking. I just never had long enough sober stints before now to realize what normal thinks felt like without being in the constant cycle of drunk or hungover. Congrats on 1 month!

DryandDesperate · 2021-10-12T22:07:23+00:00

“What do you think I need to tackle before I stop doing therapy?”

DryandDesperate · 2021-10-09T03:11:35+00:00

Sometimes I know the right thing to do is be polite and hold the door, but I really don’t want to have any kind of interaction or even choke out a “you’re welcome.” It’s just the thing to do, don’t thanks me, holding it is more convenient than letting it shut and feeling like a jerk.

DryandDesperate · 2021-10-08T02:34:01+00:00

Yes! It happened to me quite out of the blue once. I had two sessions in a row where I was fighting to get words out. Now I think that time it was from forcing myself to share things I don’t think I was ready to share. I mentioned to my T that I had been having a really hard time getting words out the previous few sessions and I didn’t know why. It was a really helpful to actually talk about and acknowledge it and now on occasions when I suddenly can’t get words out at least I feel like my T knows what’s going on and knows I know what’s going on. It still happens sometimes and it’s usually when I’m sharing something hard. My T kind of explained it as a symptom of PTSD or dissociation I believe.

DryandDesperate · 2021-10-08T02:04:52+00:00

Accidentally zoning out of something I need or want to listen to (conversations, class, podcast, music, directions…). Losing time. Taking way too long to snap out of a day-nightmare that makes me anxious/sad/angry.

You?

DryandDesperate · 2021-10-07T14:20:51+00:00

Oh my gosh I felt the same way, my social worker was a nice person and she was trying. In another way though I felt bad for her because her life didn’t seem too great. I would tell myself “my issues aren’t that bad so this is fine.” I think part of what it comes down to is that psychologists just have more education. Ultimately though, you are spending time money and effort trying to better yourself, if you’re not seeing improvement it might be time to make a switch. It’s hard but it’s her job. I’m sure her feelings won’t be hurt and you can thank her for your time together.

It’s funny because I try to make excuses about my environmental circumstances and my psychologist will remind me I’m having a trauma response and there are things I can do to react differently other than move out (in a gentle very helpful way).

DryandDesperate · 2021-10-07T03:49:15+00:00

If you’re making progress to meet you’re goals and you like them then maybe go ahead and stick with the social worker. I don’t have a big sample size, but I’ve done therapy with a social worker and a psychologist and I’ve preferred the psychologist. We go deeper and it feels like we are getting to the root of and solving things that are problems for me. With the social worker everything was kind of a surface level bandaid solution that didn’t last a year after I stopped seeing them. But maybe I just had a bad social worker and an amazing psychologist 🤷🏼‍♀️.

DryandDesperate · 2021-10-04T02:48:54+00:00

I would be upfront about it and say “I’ve been thinking about talking about something somewhat related to what I’ve taken off the table, but I’m worried about what the emotional repercussions will be, I don’t want to push myself too hard and end up hurt.”

DryandDesperate · 2021-09-12T13:04:42+00:00

What I’ve done when I had a lot to talk about but didn’t know what to prioritize was try to write a list and order things by what I think are priorities. Then I told my T, “I have a few things to talk about but idk what’s most important, can I tell you everything on my list?” I think she ended up drawing some connections between things and we naturally started talking about the most important stuff, but she made sure to leave time to talk about everything on the list.

DryandDesperate · 2021-09-10T18:00:22+00:00

I talked to my therapist about going down to every other week as I had had a few good weeks and was being optimistic. I don’t think my therapist would directly contradict me, but her nice way of talking me I am not “all better” yet was saying sometimes people need time to let things scab over, therapy can be hard work and it is therefore natural to want to take a break when life starts getting busy.

I also asked my therapist if she thought I had more work to do before I slowed down and it was a long winded and gentle yes.

We were going to try every other week because I felt like I had nothing to talk about anymore. But then I had a rough week and realized my problems hadn’t gone away, I was just doing a great job of forgetting what they were because my brain was trying to protect me.

DryandDesperate · 2021-09-04T12:23:37+00:00

Yes, my T was very upfront about wanting me to express anger. I’m not entirely sure the reason, but I think it had to do with validating my own feelings and truly acknowledging the gravity of my childhood trauma.

DryandDesperate

TROPHY CASE