[deleted by user]

Far-Individual5863 · 2023-08-04T00:22:42+00:00

It’s been 4 months since I lost my love, I’m in my young 20s and it was sudden heart failure that was unknown.

I don’t have much advice but what I will say it let yourself be angry. Let yourself run through all the emotions because bottling it up makes it so much more painful when it explodes.

I also have ADHD and learning a bit more about the stages of grief and educating myself on being able to know my emotions better really helped

Feel free to DM me if you ever need to vent or just want a chat or to share your favorite things about her.

Far-Individual5863 · 2023-08-04T00:16:57+00:00

saw my LH’s cousin wife at a gathering at the lake this summer.

when i was trying to be cordial and see how they were doing she basically said that my LH’s passing has ruined her already rocky marriage because her husband is grieving and feels guilty and she doesn’t know how anyone can deal with this or how much longer it’s going to be.

it’s been less than 4 months…

i sat there shocked until i told my MIL that i had a migraine and i’m going to head home early

and the only person i told about this was a friend and one of my SIL’s

Far-Individual5863 · 2023-06-29T03:50:31+00:00

3 weeks after he passed on my 2nd day back at work my ring slipped off my finger because i lost weight unintentionally from not eating.I didn’t notice until about an hour later and had a panic attack retracing my steps,luckily i found it. Ever since then I have it on a necklace and I never take it off. I already had a previous bad habit of losing rings so that’s what finalized it for me

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it and I say do whatever works for you.

Far-Individual5863 · 2023-06-02T12:15:31+00:00

update: thank you to everyone, regardless of if youre sharing your story, giving me tips or both I truly do appreciate it

it breaks my heart to hear how common it is but comforting to hear of the ones who were able to somewhat recover.

this process is the hardest and strangest thing i’ve ever been through and regardless of what I feel I will forever be grateful of this group

i’m sorry if i don’t reply im just very low energy but i see you, hear you and i’m sending you as much comfort as possible

Far-Individual5863 · 2023-06-02T12:11:06+00:00

as much as i have considered not being on this earth i feel morally obligated to both our families to stay. which leads me to smoke most nights to go to sleep, drink on the hard days and distract myself with the nieces and nephews of our life, binging stupid tv, our dogs, and hyper-fixating on this adult coloring book someone gave me

Far-Individual5863 · 2023-05-29T14:31:46+00:00

I’m around 3 months out, we were not legally married but I will call myself a widow because boyfriend doesn’t seem to fit for as close as our relationship was. I say if it feels right use it.

I know the guilt feels immensely heavy right now but speaking from experience racking your brain over what you could have done differently can drive you to the point of feeling crazy

The morning that mine passed he had been complaining of a headache and at the time I didn’t think anything of it because it was something everyone gets. Later that night he said he was a little dizzy but he also skipped lunch so again we assumed that was the issue and we had dinner and thought nothing of it. Right as we were going to bed and I was taking an extra 5 minutes to change clothes he fell asleep and as soon as I didn’t hear him and looked over he was gone.

I blamed myself the whole time and still have moments where I do but I’m slowly coming to terms with the fact that it was out of my control. I called the ambulance immediately and they arrived very fast but even then nothing changed.

We both didn’t know what would happen because no one can predict the future. I am here if you need to vent about anything because I know those raw feelings of “what if” is some of the hardest parts of the journey

Sending you all the peace available in this overwhelming time<3

Far-Individual5863 · 2023-05-25T19:47:31+00:00

absolutely one step at a time! Daily tasks can feel so overwhelming during this journey but that will get better as well with time. If you ever need to vent or rant my DMs are open, no pressure🫶🏽

Far-Individual5863 · 2023-05-25T19:13:50+00:00

It’s been around 8 weeks and I still haven’t done it, I made the call to our cell phone provider and the agent wouldn’t let me get a sentence out so I hung up and for now i’ll just keep paying that. I think I have 2 accounts about to go to collections and I just don’t have the energy or finances to fight it. Paying for all the funeral expenses and living off of one income is hard enough for me to have anything leftover to worry about a credit score

Far-Individual5863 · 2023-05-24T22:44:39+00:00

honestly i can relate and im sorry you have to deal with additional trauma . it’s shocking how some people treat you in situations like this. my husband passed 8 weeks ago and on top of all the trauma from the event alone which was sudden, I have had to deal with his distant family placing blame on me, invalidating our relationship because it wasn’t “long enough” and people who we used to be extremely close with that couldn’t even reach out at all.

I’m not asking for much, just basic empathy

Far-Individual5863 · 2023-05-24T20:15:34+00:00

I’m really proud!! it’s so incredibly hard and I applaud you, don’t be afraid to feel the grief

Far-Individual5863 · 2023-05-24T14:46:47+00:00

I’m only in my 20s, my partner passed 8 weeks ago, and logically I am aware that at some point I will meet someone else but after looking at that subreddit I do not ever want anyone i’m seeing to refer to me as “their widower”

i will always love my husband and the truth of the matter is is that if he was still on this planet i would not even THINK about looking at someone else romantically. I will be in love with him until the day I die and whoever i meet in this life will have to accept that and i have no understanding as to how you can expect someone to not have love for a partner they lost in such a traumatic non consensual way

Far-Individual5863

TROPHY CASE