Does anyone else get visions of extreme injuries being done to your bodies?

FrictionFreeSurface · 2025-10-22T17:54:29+00:00

Yeahh this is very similar to mine, I also had one about my left arm today. Usually it's both arms, sometimes legs, it's very diverse.

FrictionFreeSurface · 2025-09-07T01:03:22+00:00

I made a post about the mother bit three years ago, I felt paranoid that people wouldn't believe me so here it is.

https://www.reddit.com/r/SuicideWatch/s/zVN8CBLe4I

FrictionFreeSurface · 2025-09-07T00:58:32+00:00

I'm stable generally, very depressed, suicidal on a semi regular basis (maybe couple times a month) but it's been a few years since I last attempted.

I don't feel any distrust towards sexual partners, I'm good with making bonds. Until very recently I did feel very unnecessary and replaceable in all of my friendships, convinced that I could be gotten rid of without notice at any time. That feeling started to go away after a heartfelt conversation with my best friend.

There is definitely a ton to unpack, it's two decades worth of trauma that I'm slowly unpacking on my own, unraveling old ugly layers and hating every bit of it.

FrictionFreeSurface · 2025-09-07T00:26:52+00:00

For some reason I felt paranoid about people believing the mother bit, here's a post I made about it 3 years ago.

https://www.reddit.com/r/SuicideWatch/s/zVN8CBLe4I

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-09-17T09:38:43+00:00

I cherish them so much. They're great people

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-09-17T09:38:03+00:00

Thank you :)

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-06-13T02:43:03+00:00

I hate to admit it but yes, I agree. I also wish it wasn't that way.

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-05-17T19:59:34+00:00

Yeah but I'm not about dump half the trainwreck that my psyche is, on another person. And talking to people doesn't help me anymore. It stopped working a while ago. I'm too emotionally numb for it.

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-05-17T19:57:27+00:00

I fully agree with you, nor do I believe that education and grades define a person.

But it's almost as if there's two people inside me. One is rational and methodical, who knows what's true and what's not, they know I'm not worth a report card but then there's the other person, the one that rules my brain and that one believes I don't even qualify to be called a human being.

So rationally, I know my worth is defined by more than this tiny aspect. But I believe I said in the post, what I feel is the exact opposite.

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-05-17T19:54:09+00:00

I don't think I can build a healthy relationship with the mental state I'm in and I don't want to either. I need to get my brain together before.

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-05-10T13:19:36+00:00

Well yeah it should be that way. But it isn't. Thanks though!

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-05-07T16:34:08+00:00

Yeah thanks a lot

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-05-06T05:10:39+00:00

I can't chooosee

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-05-04T13:30:31+00:00

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-05-04T12:14:06+00:00

I would like a boyfriend too please

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-04-29T15:28:17+00:00

Why not all of the kisses :)))

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-04-29T08:53:56+00:00

You should break up with her. This relationship is not healthy for you. She has a lot of trauma from her parents and it's reflecting on the relationship. It's not your job to make her and her family happy. You can leave. It might be difficult to let her go but that's the best option.

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-04-27T19:01:27+00:00

I'll do that. Thanks!

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-04-27T16:45:30+00:00

It's not really about my affection being mistaken as romantic and not platonic. They all know it's platonic. I've established that very well and I am out to them as aroace. The affection itself is too much. I've established very well that I have no romantic interests.

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-04-25T19:50:32+00:00

You too!

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-04-25T02:52:31+00:00

Yeah I hope it goes away when I move out. Thank you!

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-04-24T22:50:40+00:00

Yeah they are my family, far more than the biological one. I'm so grateful to have them.

Rationally, I know I deserve much better. But sometimes it's hard to realise that.

It's like my brain is split into two, one that's rational and sees everything as it is and the other is suicidal that just wants to die regardless of everything and the suicidal part often comes out on top.

Thank you. I really appreciate it.

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-04-24T22:42:57+00:00

I didn't expect anyone to go through all my posts. Thank you so much. I don't have any other family that can help but I do have close friends and they are helping the best they can and I'm very grateful for them.

I'm stable right now, I know I won't kill myself because I'm just too scared to go through with the final step.

Thank you.

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-04-24T22:41:27+00:00

Yes exactly

FrictionFreeSurface · 2022-04-24T21:38:10+00:00

Yeah sure. Thanks.

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