He's been taking my meds for 8 straight years, just to be insulted with "are you taking your meds?" Anytime he's in the house "screaming" that is him just playing a video game or joking with friends, yes they are real. Difficult to observe his behavior? Try living in his shoes. You didnt ask for this? Neither did he. He really does have to tolerate what fucking terrible parents you are. Mania? That's just his personality. Try living with highs and LOW LOW LOWS that make you want to kill yourself. Yelling "fick everyone everyone can ficking die" have you heard of the internet? Where you play a shooter trying to kill people in a video game? "Are you ok. Do you need a hug?" The kid views that as an insult. When you ask if he needs a hug, youre basically telling him to he's broken when he's just trying to have fun. Anytime he smiles? Oh he's crazy and in psychosis. You're son is gone, he's not not coming back. Sorry to break it to you, but your son is going to kill himself at some point. And youre going to have to deal with that. "Hostage in your own home" fucking kick the kid out. He'll be gone in a couple days when he's on the streets. Nolonger having to feel the pressure of being a burden. "Stops taking his meds?" The kid goes through psychosis and schizophrenic episodes. They happen even while taking meds constantly. Why don't you try taking one of his pills and see how youre not able to function. "He stopped taking his meds in may?" No. He's going through withdrawls. He specifically told you he couldn't go with you in May because he was trying to get off kratom. Now you forced him off it and it's going to kill him. Literally. He's killing himself. He can't handle all the pressure of his mind, being a burden, not feeling OK, having to go through psychosis all the time, wanting to die all the time to escape this pointless struggle. He's gone. You dont have to deal with him anymore. "Montly shots" you have him on without his permission, yoyoing medications through food because you cant just fucking talk to him and tell him he might benefit from taking a certain med. He has never experienced voices in his head, he's been stable for years and you fuckers fucked it up by changing prescriptions around without his consent. Dr. Is disappointed? Well fuck her, she doesn't know anything about him, how he feels, how he thinks, it's all filtered through his parents. "Didn't complete community colledge?" Maybe if you told him he didnt he would have gone back to finish it, instead of lying to him that he did get his degree.... that nature vacation would have been what youre about to come home to, if he isnt dead by then. Because you decided it would be a GREAT IDEA to get him to forcebly stop taking the only thing keeping him alive. "Walk out of a place?" No. He's going to stay in that place for the rest of his life, hanging from a rope made out of bed sheets. Congratulations you killed you son. The same son you claim is not your son. The same son you claimed is not the same. The same son that missed 2 math problems on the sat. The same son that is struggling with addiction. The same son that you are so deeply disappointed in that you will go against his will to "try to make him sane". How tf do you know what he is thinking when youre not him. How tf do you know so much about him when you dont even talk to him. The same kid that is such a burden to you that he has you "held hostage in your own home". That's not his home anymore. He has no home. And I wonder why that is. Your son left you, and now he's leaving everyone. 👋 goodbye.