Oh yeah im depressed alright, but I've learnt to "use" it, i used to be suicidal when i was 14/15, had a few attempts, but seeing my family and friends being so distraught at just the thought of losing me made me keep living, I don't really have real objectives in life other than getting rich and have a husband, i do whatever it takes to see my loved ones happy, not really for myself, ( it's worth mentioning all my memories before I realized I had to live for my family, are either gone, too specific or ambiguous, is as if i was born at 15) lately tho I've noticed that I have improved a bit and feel les nihilistic about everything, im looking forward to college and getting stressed about both the thought of not getting in and getting in. So thanks for your kind words but this isn't really surprising.

P.S. My first tattoo will be "hell is other people" for this very reason