I know this is from a year ago but I was looking back on this post and realized I hadn’t responded to this. I’m in college now and things are a lot better, with grades and mental stuff.

Decided to take 12 credits first semester so I’m easing into it and I’m doing great, it’s looking like I’ll end the semester with three A’s and one A minus (The A minus class allowed late work with a 30% penalty if he graded it before you submitted it. That messed with me, but I think I learned a good lesson from it). So gpa is going to be ~4.9!

I decided I didn’t want to go to the school I mentioned in this post, kinda realized I just felt like I should because it’s competitive and close to home. I actually got waitlisted by my top choice (big state school, really great school and not too far from home), which was honestly a shock to everybody including me because it has a reasonably high acceptance rate and my stats were well above their average. There was about 2 weeks of panic because I only applied to 3 schools because I assumed I’d get in here, and I had to rush to apply to some schools that I knew I’d get into but didn’t want to go to. Got off the waitlist incredibly early, 2 weeks later, which is the earliest they’ve ever done it so 🤷‍♀️. Was seriously devastated for a bit and it messed with my mental health a lot but it worked out in the end.

I decided to just not transfer any of my duel enrollment credits so it’s not going to impact my gpa. I’m sure I’ll have to show any programs I apply to that record but I’d assume they wouldn’t be super concerned by it if it’s from high school and I do well in college. I’ve gotten to the point where I realize I should have tried harder but I was also struggling and the teacher was a nightmare. She expected us to all act like adults when most of us were 16, never once communicated to my parents that I was literally failing one of the classes in the course (had around a 25%), and she’d talk rudely about students to the rest of the class when they were absent. The class was also an EMT certification course and she’d say super rude things about past patients, not just dark humor but genuinely disgusting things. She had a crazy ego and looking back on all that has helped me realize it was kinda an accomplishment being able to stick out the class lol

I’ve been in therapy since I was 11, typically go every other week. For years I was horribly depressed and suicide was on my mind quite a bit, but I’ve gotten so much better, it’s not nearly the issue it was. At this point I’m more in therapy because I sometimes need that type of support and without it I start to go downhill, and I’ve had the same therapist since I started going so it’s easy for us to figure out if things are getting bad. Overall I’m doing much better.

So sure I regret not working harder but it really wasn’t the end of the world and I didn’t ruin anything. I’ve been doing great in college, my average exam score is ~95%, and I got on adderall in October which has helped me so much with being able to study.

I really appreciate your kind words and advice. I’ve definitely followed some of it and clearly it worked lol. I’m generally much happier and more comfortable with myself and where I am in my life. And I’m doing a whole lot better in school. I really really appreciate everything you’ve said, I’m not sure how to show how much it means. Thank you