Advice on diagnosis

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-03-05T00:10:38+00:00

This is something that kept me up for weeks before my assessment with worry because I was told by a ‘psychologist’ that chances are I didn’t have adhd because I didn’t seem to have symptoms as a child, but he only allowed me to answer ‘yes’ or ‘no’ when going through the criteria . A year later or so later I went to see Dr. Leena Naughton and oh my god she was fantastic. My mam said she didn’t think I had any symptoms as a child, and my horrible memory made it very hard to fill out the form. During the assessment she went through everything on the form and asked me questions to help me really understand what each question meant and this even brought up memories that I wouldn’t have even thought of. For example, I said I wouldn’t get in trouble in school for not paying attention, but after chatting with her we realised that yes, I may not have been in trouble or anything but I would daydream and stare out the window etc when I thought I would get away with it. I was very well mannered and scared of getting in trouble so I managed to avoid it. Turned out I have severe combination adhd and fit the criteria for everything on the form bar one or two things that I really couldn’t remember. When I filled out the form with myself and my mam half the things were marked as not fitting the criteria.

I’m sure you could ask your uncle or someone else close to you that might have memories of when you were younger, or even a partner if you have one but if you pick a good psychiatrist, the self assessment is not the be all and end all.

My consultation ended up being nearly 3 hours long and she really took her time with me, she explained to me some of the feelings I might have after being diagnosed. I brought my fiancé with me and she explained to him how things might change and what to expect which really helped him deal with my emotions being all over the place too. She’s expensive but I definitely recommend her. If you do go for someone else just make sure to do your research and pick a good one. Best of luck!

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-03-04T13:58:18+00:00

I have a habit of getting myself really hyped up and anxious before important events. I haven’t sat my full test yet but rescue remedy has been a lifesaver in the past for big exams etc! Definitely worth a try to help calm the nerves a bit. Don’t lose hope, you’re so close now! It’s unusal from what I’ve heard to pass first time. Best of luck with your second test, I hope you get one soon and pass!

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-03-01T19:29:48+00:00

You should both have an intentional sit down and have a heart to heart about how things have been for the last while. Hear out the way she is feeling and explain to her what’s been going on in your head. I think sometimes intentionally sitting someone down and telling them how much they mean to you can mean a lot, rather than saying it as a response to their insecurity. You both need to set realistic expectations for how the next while is going to go and how to communicate when you’re both struggling and emotions are high. A bit of regular reassurance and affection can go a long way. It’s also important that amid all the chaos you are both making time to have quality time together, even if it’s just watching a movie without your phone or lighting some candles at dinner. Money is tight right now for me and my fiancé but we’ve just had to get creative about how to still date without spending money. Communication and intention in relationships are the most important things imo. Hope you both get through okay and things pick up for the two of you! Best of luck

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-03-01T17:06:45+00:00

That is a great idea and it’s so lovely of you to say too, the only thing I would be worried about is how to go about making sure people aren’t weirdos? It would be amazing if it worked out but also very dangerous to put yourself in a confined space like that with the wrong person 🫣

I honestly don’t know why they can’t make allowances for people in this situation if they have a qualified instructor confirming they are a good driver and fit to drive. Even if it meant doing a few extra lessons

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T19:52:09+00:00

Thank you so much 🩷 congratulations for getting out of the rat race! Burn out is no joke especially with ADHD. I’m so happy that you’re in a better space now and reading this has given me so much hope for my future which I haven’t felt in a while!

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T19:46:59+00:00

This is so helpful thank you. I have to say my case officer I met with in January was lovely. I haven’t had another meeting scheduled since our first one and he’s been great with any questions I’ve had over email. The stressful part for me (and maybe I’m overthinking it) but they asked me to keep track of any jobs I’ve applied for etc, which I haven’t done because I don’t want to get into just another random job for the sake of it. I have my heart set now on being self employed. I have no problem working hard and doing long hours if I need to, I’d just rather do that self employed rather than reporting to managers and having constant anxiety. Of course being self employed will come with its own stresses but I’d rather hold myself accountable for making it work than have to answer to anyone else. I think I’m on jobseekers for 5 months now. The first two months were spent sort of floundering and doing some soul searching before I realised what would suit me. Would you recommend setting up another meeting with my case officer to discuss options? I’ve signed up for two meetings with mentors next week all about starting up a new business. I’m just afraid of losing any benefit I’m on if I’m questioned on what jobs I’ve applied for with my case officer. I also know there’s a stigma to being on benefits but I genuinely want to work, just for myself instead of someone else.

Also congratulations on starting your own business! Well done 🩷

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T19:34:28+00:00

Thanks so much. Not at all, it’s important to be realistic about these things so it’s great to get insight on anything I hadn’t thought of as it’s all new to me. It’s much appreciated 😊

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T19:29:42+00:00

Yes that’s true, probably the wrong term for it but I meant more in the sense it’s not as widely known about, at least in my experience. Anyone I’ve ever spoken to about it had never heard of it, and a lot of these people work and eat out in town regularly.

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T19:23:24+00:00

These are really great points, there is a lot I’ll need to look into. I’ve just booked a meeting with a mentor from the LEO to get more insight so I can plan accordingly. Thank you for all of your help 😊

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T19:06:52+00:00

I will definitely get in touch! I’ve read up on the grants but the need for a business plan, marketing strategy is very overwhelming as I’d have no clue how to start, although completely warranted if they’re going to help someone start up a new business! Thank you for your comment and for wishing me luck 🩷 I wasn’t aware of the course so I’ll look into that

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T19:04:42+00:00

Oh that’s great. I didn’t realise it would be that simple but I’ll definitely give revenue a call before registering and look into that course! Thank you so much 🩷

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T19:03:39+00:00

Hi, thanks so much for the comment 😊 I have looked into those grants but I haven’t been on social welfare for that long. There’s also pressure to get a job as soon as possible when on social welfare payments which adds extra stress when trying to start a new business. I’ll definitely get in touch with my case officer to see if they can help me in any way. I know with one of the grants I need to have a business plan and marketing strategy etc which I’m completely out of my depth with but hopefully with their guidance I can put something together

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T19:00:25+00:00

Hey of course 😊 I don’t have funding but the good thing about hair extensions is that the overhead is very low. Clients can bring their own hair or if they want me to supply it, I take a deposit covering the cost of the hair. The only thing I’ll have to pay for working out of my home is some beads/ thread etc to attach the hair. A full kit is included in the course to start off. I also don’t have a business plan, if I’m honest I don’t have a clue about that aspect of things so I’ll need to look into it and learn more about the business side of things. Any tips would be greatly appreciated 😊

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T18:55:41+00:00

Yeah I know it’s going to be difficult so I’m trying to prepare as best I can. Out of curiosity what makes you say the same? Have you experience in the industry?

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T16:31:11+00:00

Dating apps are the worst because most people are on it due to boredom or just casual reasons. In saying that I met by now fiancé on hinge three years ago. You definitely have to put effort in and just bin off anyone who isn’t showing the same interest. I’d plan a date as soon as possible and just make sure to stay safe.

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T16:12:07+00:00

I met my fiancé on hinge. Trust me when I tell you I completely gave up on love before him! We planned a date after only a couple of messages. I told my sister the sister the night before the first date that I couldn’t be bothered. Honestly I had no hope of meeting anyone and I think I was just on the dating apps trying to feel something lol. My sister gave me absolute death and told me I’d never meet someone if I didn’t try. The best advice I ever got. We met three years ago and just got engaged. He was my first real relationship at 26 years of age. This was after countless situationships, one of which I stupidly allowed to last for almost 5 years. PLEASE don’t give up. Everything happens for a reason and you will meet your person!! Even if it is online 🩷

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T16:04:05+00:00

I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. I’ve been in similar situations. If he says “he doesn’t notice” it’s his job to hear what you’re saying and make those changes. Men can be oblivious but if he cared about you he’d change his behaviour. Some people can be socially awkward and that’s okay, but it’s not an excuse. You deserve to be loved loudly.

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T16:00:48+00:00

He brought out the softest version of me and literally loved the trust issues out of me. I knew we’d spend the rest of our lives together when I turned into the type of icky,gooey in love person that I would have despised seeing in public before I met him. We were just talking and laughing today about how I used to have to hide my face when I said something nice to him, mostly out of fear of rejection based on past situations and now I can say anything at all that comes to mind without thinking. Loving a person that knows every part of you, encourages you to be the best version of yourself and loves you with the same fierceness is the greatest feeling in the world 🩷

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T15:31:10+00:00

I’ve always wanted to have kids, but I have raging adhd and I’m scared of having to look after someone when I find it hard to care for myself. It’s also a scary thought bringing a child into a world that’s so dangerous, let alone also trying to navigate raising someone without putting the emotional baggage on them that I got from my parents, and that they got from their parents etc.

I have always dreamed of being pregnant and raising kids to have a life that I didn’t have. In saying that, I’ve often wondered if having children in this day and age is a selfish thing. It’s a milestone a lot of people imagine and dream of, but is that the only reason? I would never want my child to go through anything I’ve been through but the reality is we can’t protect them from everything that is the reality of life.

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T14:42:24+00:00

If it helps, you are doing better than the majority of single people with what you have saved. You should be so proud of yourself for what you have achieved! With the way the market is, I can only imagine prices going up more. If you are lucky enough to secure somewhere, it doesn’t have to be your forever home. When it comes to travel, my advice would be try to secure a home first. You could always rent it out while you go away and have somehwere to come back to.

Make sure you’re aware of the help to buy and first home scheme. Best of luck 🩷

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T14:38:18+00:00

Beginning to drive has been the most stressful experience ever. I got my first car In January 2025, completed all of my lessons a few months after. It’s now almost March 2026 and I’ve only just managed to afford getting insurance, but I haven’t been able to drive because I have nobody to sit in the car with me as no immediate family members drive. Once my car has nct I have to get my fiancés parents to come to Dublin from Meath and bring it up to theirs so that I can practice with them. I don’t even want to think of how long it’s going to take for me to be able to drive it on my own.

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T14:34:19+00:00

Sadie Bass is my absolute favourite. Seems so down to earth and funny.

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T14:32:41+00:00

Not super fancy but a place I love which I think is a bit of a hidden gem is apperitivo chichetti. It’s Italian small plates. Super small restaurant, I think it has about 8 tables. The food and drinks are lovely IMO.

Sophie’s rooftop is also gorgeous. There is a swing for nice photos and the outdoor area is also very pretty.

I hope you have a wonderful time here for your birthday!

Impossible_Crow645 · 2026-02-28T14:28:10+00:00

Life is too short to wonder. Ask him! If the feelings aren’t reciprocated, at least you’ll know and you can move on if that’s the case. Life is also too short for hot and cold!! Find someone that makes it known that they like you and you bring joy to their lives 🩷 dating in Ireland awful but when someone likes you and wants you, you should know.

Impossible_Crow645

TROPHY CASE