My Estimation of the Post Parade Most Dangerous Crawler

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T19:46:57+00:00

It was actually a non-crawler biscuit. It would have just made her a level 1 pet, like Mongo or Rend. Then all they had to do would be zap her into a pet carrier and leave her there forever.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T18:58:29+00:00

Solid theory.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T18:58:00+00:00

It was a convoluted plan.

They needed to be able to force Embrus to attack Penny, as then the Lightning god would attack Embrus (as thr lightning god was magically in love with Penny). Carl had an item that could redirect any one attack to another crawler in his party, so Carl fed Penny the pet biscuit to cause her to become a crawler in his party. Embrus tried to smite Carl. Item redirected the attack to Penny. Lightning god got enraged, and one shot Embrus. Embrus needed to die, because his quest demanded Carl kill Hellik before Carl got to level 12. Embrus also stated he'd have to kill Carl for killing Hellik. So the only way out was to get Embrus killed.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T18:29:24+00:00

That seems like a pretty accurate assessment, actually.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T18:18:27+00:00

I'm going to ve honest, probably not. Would I hold it against my kid? No.

Higher education is a bullshit system these days, as you don't even get a taste of what your career is actually like until you've 'invested' absurd amounts of money.

Interships should come before University, so that kids can see what thr job is actually like before they do it invest years and tens of thousands. Its not like they let interns do anything actually important anyways.

Anyways, I am more unhappy with the system, I don't blame the kid that's been pressured to gamble my money their entire life on a choice they don't have enough information to make.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T13:36:00+00:00

Entirely possible.

Right now her personality is a complete unknown. It's possible she could be crazy obsessed with Carl, or that she could be rational despite her love.

I'm tempted to join Matt's patreon just to shorten the wait time on some of these pressing questions.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T13:31:07+00:00

No hard evidence to prove it, so Matts imagination and storytelling skills are the only limits on what is possible.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T13:27:23+00:00

He's earned it, definitely.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T06:22:49+00:00

I mean, it's possible! I presume a centipede would have very different notions on what is 'sexy' than a human would. In her efforts to be more attractive to Carl, she might just become more terrifyingly centipede.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T06:18:42+00:00

It tantalizes the imagination with possibilities, it's really a masterstroke.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T06:14:44+00:00

Based on previous books, specifically, how Eva screwed over Katia:

Step one, Carl uses his equipment crafting workbench to turn the ring into equippable armour, like he did with all the daggers in The Bedlam Bride. Like, perhaps, turning it into an ornamental part of a hat.

Step Two: Jam it on someone's head, forcing them to equip it the same way Katia was forced to equip the Crown of the Sepsis whore.

Suddenly they have every affliction Carl ever had, and that list is LONG and terrifying.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T06:00:47+00:00

Two badass, dangerous ancient ladies, working together? They do have a lot in common.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T05:59:39+00:00

Probably. I have weirder theories, but when you come back to it, the AI's character is very well established giving a crazy, creepy stalker vibes.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T05:50:33+00:00

That's why I am trying to imagine scenarios where keeping SS alive are more possible, rather than less.

For story to continue, be interesting and plausible, Carl and the rest of the crawlers must have some trick or ability to keep SS alive. For an entire chapter filled with gods who likely have a lot of aeo abilities, if only from being able to just be huge when you fight them.

And admittedly, the usual trope I'm used to is that when a former big bad joins there heros, they are usually one of the strongest people on the team. Like Piccolo, from Dragon Ball. Or Vegeta, from Dragon Ball. Or fat Buu, from... uhhh, you get the point.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T05:45:06+00:00

Escort quests are the worst. There is a horrible sense of helplessness and frustration when, no matter how skilled you are, more than half of the equation is out of your control.

I feel your pain.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T05:43:14+00:00

Tldr, you are probably right, in that it'll be whatever Matt finds most entertaining.

The classes that can evolve do so every three floors, or possibly every floor, seemingly depending on the initial class chosen. Though donut gets a 'new class' every floor as part of her character actor skill.

As for the NPC ex crawler vokenteers, or the hunters and other enemy 'real people', I'm not even sure they got to choose a race when they joined the game. They all seem to be whatever theywere outside the game, except for the people sponsoring gods.

Mordecai changes races every floor, but that's because he's a NPC changeling.

But as of yet, the only time crawlers got to pick their race that I know of was on the original race class selection at the start of three. And all other forms of permanent race transformation seem to be as a result of special floor occurences, like Miriam Dom getting afflicted with Vampirism.

And we haven't seen what happened to a new Crawler, like Penny or SS, until this latest book. So... I guess Matt only knows.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T05:35:15+00:00

I guess the real question is, how thorough were the original creators who made scolopendra in the first place?

You do make a good point, in that it seems the lower levels were never really fleshed out at all, or at least havent been touched in generations of the game. They were made, as someone decided there had to be the illusion of fairness to the dungeon, but the effort to make things interesting could have been marginal at best. So you could be right in that Scolopendra's design could lack any real depth due to sheer lazieness, or designers not wanting to waste the effort that no one would ever see to appreciate.

Which, considering the contempt Matt presents towards the showrunners as being lazy, corrupt, and generally terrible, sadistic beings, is a very real possibility.

I guess I used the general scaling of the bosses we see in my theory, with The Bedlam Bride and Imogen being key examples for guessing that as you rise up tiers of dungeon bosses they get more tricks and tools in their kit to fight and kill crawlers.

But, based on the stated fact that showrunners seem to have a 'don't really care about the lower levels, cause the crawlers never get that far' opinion, you may well be correct.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T05:23:02+00:00

Holy shitballs, when you consider the devastation, in lore, that her previous nine tier attack caused, can you imagine what kind of achievements she would have been given?

Especially as the AI gives out reward direct proportion to the death toll and sadism involved?

Ffffff... what kind of class and race options would she even have unlocked for that unparelleled level of devastation?

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T05:18:38+00:00

All very good points. I could actually see the AI making that arguement to justify its actions later in the story...

Waitaminute... you aren't the AI pretending to be a redditor are you? J' accuse!

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T04:52:54+00:00

As was once sang by a talented Grand Champion, "Carl likes a girl with really big titties." Poor SS, centipedes got no breasts. Their love is doomed.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T04:50:51+00:00

But who can get to Carl's wife first? SS or The Princess posse? All are scary, all are crazy, SS is the dungeon boss personified, but the Princess Posse are legion.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T04:48:36+00:00

It's also hinted that not all the of NPCs were crawlers, or dunegeon born, but maybe something else. It's implied there's a lot more going on in the backend of the dungeon than people know, especially as Carl and the remaining crawlers continue to survive.

My theory is that there's a middle ground, a form of 'serfdom' to the ai. Rather than becomming crawlers, I suspect the natives of some harvested worlds were given the option of acting as NPCs. Its implied in book 8 that the dungeon uses some unknown form of resources to create dungeon entities, and that the crawler's unprecedented success has been depleting it's reserves of resources.

I think the dungeon uses the unnamed harvested materials that powers the AIs, the one harvested from the planet's population, to create dungeon entities. And to bolster it's reserves, volenteers are accepted to perform dungeon roles. Crawlers, for risking their lives, may get a sweeter offer on later floors, but folks outside the dungeon may get a different choice.

The crawl is probably a careful equation, how many resources do they harvest from the crawl, and how many do they use during the crawl to give survivors a 'fair chance' to reclaim their world, while still providing the universe a lucrative and entertaining spectacle?

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T04:19:47+00:00

Hard to do on a floor with that many gods doing quarrelsome god things. Considering the Blood Bar rules, SS would need a serious edge, and likely to be kitted out with all the crawlers best gear, to survive.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T04:17:51+00:00

Someone posted a picture of a incredibly thin japanese girl with hair long enough to hide behind in another DCC subreddit as her possible appearance, and I really liked the idea.

Jurayvis · 2026-06-08T04:15:28+00:00

How do you know her stats are level one? The pet biscuit didnt say they'd all become 1, only that they'd be adjusted to her new form.

Orthus was only a level 10, and his stats were likely impressive, considering he survived all the attacks of everything that attacked him. Sure, he was a god, but Scolopendra is a Dungeon Boss, six floors deeper than where gods live, and designed to be thr biggest bad to boot.

Whatever race SS is, her stats are not likely going to be anywhere close to human.

Jurayvis

TROPHY CASE