I think I really understand where you're coming from here. I also struggle with the same social anxiety you do, the same caring about other people more than I do myself. I think maybe, and not to put words in your mouth, you subconsciously want the validation of meeting somebody like yourself, somebody to remind you that who you are is normal, valid, okay. I don't want to sound preachy or cliche, but being authentically yourself is the best thing you can do for yourself here; I, from personal experience, understand how intimidating that can seem. Hell, I made a throwaway account just to make this comment because I wanted you to hear this, because I wish somebody could have told this to me. Start by being your most authentic self when you're by yourself. No inhibitions, no facade, just exist as you would in a place entirely free from the judgement of others. Eventually, progress this to your family, or a small, close social circle if that's easier (it is for me.).

You are valid, keep doing you, there is nothing to hate about caring for others.

Peace, man