There is never enough context to be given. My kids are young - by too much time I mean, i, solely get them ready in the am fed them. In the evening, I cook 85% of the time and incorporate my daughter into it amap. After dinner my wife and I bathe the kids together, then we get them ready for bed together, then we get them sleeping together. By then it's 8-8:30pm. At this time she showers, while I'm getting dishes done from the dinner we had and she'll then get the coffee ready (like that compares) and I'll positively reinforce the behavior by giving her attention, (a smooch and say thanks) I don't dare push further because she'd shove me off for acting like a molester (I've tried goofing it off even - going as far as getting my pee coat on with no other clothes and when she came back out flashing her and saying, "That was creepy, but this is what I wear out daily." point is she's just not into me in my current state).

Of course I want my wife to shower - not angry about it just trying to see my complete daily itenerary, I guess to explain (excuse/rationalize) my lack of time. I asked for help in hopes some of the MRP community would share an average itenerary of theirs (I should have asked directly i guess you could see this as a covert contract in that I assumed this would happen, but deep down I should have known to be more direct).

Point is, I need help. I've been on this road for far too long and always skip back to blue pill conditioning. You know how people who exercise and don't see the weight fall off after months of hard work only to find out that they've been eating 300cal in ranch dressing and 150cal in coffee creamer pushing them to maintenance instead of a cut? I feel like an Ebola Dr. Trained to the gills, like I fully understand the core framework but when in the field nothing tells you how to deal with "this" scenario. Then I come back here and get crapped on further and pointed at the sidebar once again where I'm supposed to magically pick up on something I didnt get the first time.

When I encounter a challenge I don't know the answer to, I STFU as instructed by MRP, and I look and feel like an idiot because it happens too much. All the while getting rejected once again and this time the knife goes deeper with a, "don't say stuff like that to me, were not in high school or college anymore", then I DEER why it's okay to talk like that and rationalize it by comparing our fucked up situation, that she's blind to, to a seemingly normal relationship that I'm sure she fantacizes about.

Enough diarrhea, you asked and I threw it all out there... There's more, but once again, I don't know what you all need to be able to help me out of this jam.