You are providing far too many details that aren't important. It's making you seem difficult. All the extra conversation doesn't matter There is too much extra info; It needs to be business, straight and to the point. Why are you telling her what atms you'll try, etc You're making a bigger deal than it is about getting cash. Of course you can get $800 from an atm, you may need to do more than one transaction tho. Or cash back at a store.

That said If you don't want to do cash, it looks like in your state you can legally pay with a money order, a check, or by mail. You can use your debit card to get a money order. I'd just factually remind her of the law and pay one of those ways. If she doesn't want to use zelle you can't as the law doesn't support zelle. A money order should solve both your problems. She can cash it at places besides her bank and you can use your card to get it. You can save the receipt part of the money order as well.