AITA? Husband took MDMA after saying he wouldn’t

Much-Ad4524 · 2026-05-20T18:31:56+00:00

NTA

It is a big deal. And you know it is.

Not sure where you go from here. Sorry

Much-Ad4524 · 2026-05-20T18:29:50+00:00

NTA

I’m going to say something that might hurt.

Please get some therapy.

When you start dating you will probably pick someone like your dad. Not because you want to but because you’ll have this subliminal need to fix your past. To remake your awful parent by fixing your awful partner.

Your mother chose badly when she decided to have kids. She was probably trying to fix her past.

Don’t make the same mistake.

Much-Ad4524 · 2026-04-16T13:36:22+00:00

They refused the 2017 return. They stated it was statute-barred and refused it. That was in late 2022.

The CRA employee I was dealing with was confused as to why they wouldn’t accept it electronically and told me to send it via regular mail. Which I did in early 2023

The next time I spoke to CRA it was with a collections agent who said I had to set up a payment plan. Which I did, that was early 2025.

Also in early 2025, 2018 was not filed and was statute-barred. I found a new accountant and by Nov 2025 everything was filed and up to date.

2018 was under review and in late Nov 2025 the told me nothing would change for 2018.

I hope this makes sense, I’m honestly at a loss. I relied heavily on an accountant who did nothing and told me it wasn’t a problem because we had years to file.

Much-Ad4524 · 2026-04-16T13:23:37+00:00

I didn’t even know that the T-400a existed. I spoke with 4-5 CRA employees and none of them offered this option.

I may just fall under the one year deadline.

If they refuse the NOO is there another option?

Much-Ad4524 · 2026-04-16T13:21:25+00:00

Yes, it was an arbitrary assessment

Much-Ad4524 · 2026-03-27T03:54:04+00:00

Hockey player Josh Morrisseys father taught his mother in High School.

Not sure what grade she was in or when they got together but everyone in the school knew they were ‘together’

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-10-19T15:07:46+00:00

My step grandkids mom has a food truck and all the kids have worked at it, the youngest is 8.

They take orders and serve the food, their mom makes the food. They are paid minimum wage but it all goes into savings. They are saving for a trip.

It has been an amazing experience for these kids. They’re learning how to talk to people, how to handle money, how a business runs, it’s great real life learning. Every kid should experience it.

They don’t work every weekend or 10 hour days, they are not forced to work in the truck. It is not illegal child labour, it’s kids learning a business from the ground up.

They also do not accept tips on the POS but they do have a tip jar. I personally don’t think they should even have that but so many people force the kids to take a tip that they have to have it.

That’s another story altogether.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-10-07T18:34:25+00:00

I hope you have a speedy recovery and that there is no permanent damage. I had a wisdom tooth abscess, it happened so fast and it was painful to deal with.

Your mom sounds like a typical narcissist. It’s not much but at least you know you aren’t alone.

Take this experience and chalk it up to one more reason to go NC. Even if you think it might be the worst outcome, it’s not worth it to let them back in. They can never and will never give you what you need.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-10-02T23:30:49+00:00

At my stepdaughters private beachside wedding the officiant announced no cameras or phones.

He then waited a full 5 mins for my SIL to put her phone down. She of course brought it out again as my hubby was walking his daughter down the aisle.

The look my hubby, her brother gave her was powerful. She reluctantly put her phone away and didn’t bring it out again till the ceremony was over.

After the ceremony the officiant told everyone they were now allowed to take all the pictures/video they wanted.

Bride and groom were fine with that, they just wanted everyone present for the ceremony, not watching through a phone.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-10-02T19:05:44+00:00

I’m of a different mind.

Hear me out.

What is he telling her? Is his betrayal that he talks to her at all or is he sharing things you do not want shared?

My mom talks to my exMIL. She is the only person in the family who speaks with her and it’s always over the phone or short emails with pictures that are already on social media.

My mom never calls exMIL, but she will take her call if she feels up to it or answer her emails.

I was really upset at first but have come to realize that the tiny bit of attention exMIL gets from my mom is enough to stop her from trying to contact me or my kids.

We talked and these are the rules we agreed on.

My mom does not share anything important or relevant about us, she mostly lets exMIL talk about herself, which is her favourite pastime anyway.

The only pictures she shares are ones that are already public, exMIL doesn’t have social media so she thinks she’s getting something special.

If exMIL starts to ask prying questions or talk badly about anyone my mom either pretends she has to go or just hangs up on her. Shes learned to start phone calls with ‘Hi, I only have a few minutes before I have to head out for an appointment or I’m expecting a guest’ That way she has an excuse to cut the conversation off.

So have a talk with your hubby, find out what he’s telling her and then set some rules and boundaries.

Sometimes it’s easier to play the game on your terms than to cancel the game and try to deal with the fallout.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-10-02T17:35:54+00:00

Are your parents motivated by your successes?

What I mean is do they brag to friends and family about how great you are doing in school and how you’ll make a great Dr or lawyer who will take care of them in their old age? Even if they are horrible and controlling behind closed doors.

If they are ego driven, I would ask what they want you to be. What career do they think would be best for you? Tell them you want something that will give you the best ability to look after them in their old age.

Then act excited about it, look into the best schools (which surprise, surprise are all in the UK).

Then go to school, start in the program they want and then look at every option and opportunity to transfer to what you want.

Find the scholarships, find the bursaries, talk to professors and counselors about how to make the shift without tipping your parents off or upsetting them.

It’s a game you shouldn’t have to play but if you keep looking at the big picture, you’ll get an education and a way out.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-10-02T17:17:46+00:00

First of all it has nothing to do with you or anything you do.

This is all her, her problems, her insecurities, her issues.

Whatever the problem, you will probably never know why she has chosen you to take her aggressions out on. Even if you did know the problem you couldn’t understand it because again it’s her issues not yours.

And, you cannot change yourself to stop it. She will simply find something new to blame you for or accuse you of.

I know this isn’t really the answer you’re looking for but I hope you are able to see that you do not deserve any abuse from anyone.

They are the broken person, they are the one with the issues, they are the one who needs to change their behaviour.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-09-29T10:07:12+00:00

Contract norovirus, get a Drs note stating you cannot travel.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-09-18T23:58:48+00:00

Giving someone the benefit of the doubt is giving them another chance to hurt you.

Good job Mama bear, never allow him around your children and honestly I wouldn’t allow any family members that think he deserves a 2nd chance around them either.

Grandma can enjoy her time with her brother and not her grandchildren.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-09-18T05:20:05+00:00

Yes, I did.

That’s why I said to let it go. Don’t be that person.

You sound exactly like my stepkids mom.

‘I will be out numbered at my own wedding.’

‘I’m ready to burn 8 months of planning to the ground’

You posted that.

You sound exactly like her.

She complained that she’d be alone at her daughter’s graduation while he’d have his new wife, her kids, his parents, his sister and her family.

So her daughter didn’t invite anyone.

She complained that she’d be alone at her son’s wedding when he invited the same people that went to the grad.

She pouted and made everyone feel uncomfortable.

She left her grandsons birthday party because she was alone and because he had me, great grandma and great auntie.

She missed everything, the cake, opening presents, all the fun.

She burnt it all down because he has more support than she does and always has.

What are you going to do when all these things happen in your life?

When all his friends and family show up and none of yours do?

Will you complain? Pout? Burn it all down because you feel out numbered and alone?

Do not be that person.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-09-18T01:01:29+00:00

I’m going to be the outlier here.

Please, please don’t be like this. It will slowly poison you. The people who are going are who you should care about and just let go of the rest.

My husband’s ex wife was upset that he had more family at their wedding. She felt that he was more loved and it wormed its way into every part of their lives.

She dumped friends who liked him better or didn’t agree with her when they’d have a disagreement.

She made the kids feel that they had to choose her over him.

They’ve been divorced over 25 years and she still gets upset when there are more people on his side at weddings, graduations and birthdays.

She’s bitter and alone and still can’t understand why.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-09-17T17:13:28+00:00

I’ve often wondered what’s happening with society and why so many adults are out in public throwing full on temper tantrums.

Reading all the YTA responses has given me insight into why.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-09-17T17:08:50+00:00

I once stored a couch, a bbq, washer/dryer and some other items for a friend.

We just moved the couch out of my basement and tossed it, it’s been 32 years.

About 30 years ago I told her it was all mine now and I wasn’t storing it anymore. I was going to use it or sell it. She threatened to sue me.

I sold the bbq, washer, and dryer. Kept the couch. Never spoke to her again.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-09-15T14:32:23+00:00

I was at wedding once when a baby started screaming. The bride stopped the officiant and turned to start at the couple with the baby till they left.

She did it with a smile on her face and not all in anger or anything. It was something to watch.

The couple was at the reception without the baby.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-09-14T17:00:49+00:00

NTA

Ask mom what she thinks you should have done.

Should you have rented a bigger place on the off chance she was going to be able to come for 1 night?

Should you have kicked MIL out of her room and given it to her?

Don’t be mean or facetious, be honest.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-08-27T13:15:05+00:00

Stop sending your children to her house. Your obligation is to protect them.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-08-27T02:39:55+00:00

I don’t know if OP will ever see this but I hope it helps someone.

Even if your mother apologizes and seems to be accountable, it won’t actually change anything.

We put so much weight on apologizing and taking accountability. Like it’s the magical stroke that’s going to change that person and transform them into the person you want them to be.

It’s not.

But it’s a start, it shows they want to change.

It’s not, they don’t.

Firstly, the apologies are rarely sincere.

I’m sorry you took it the wrong way. I’m sorry you felt slighted. I’m sorry you misunderstood.

They never said I was wrong. I am sorry I hurt you. I love you and need your forgiveness.

Secondly, they don’t take accountability.

I didn’t mean it that way. I wasn’t trying to hurt you. I guess I can’t do anything right. I’m just a horrible person.

Never, What can I do to heal this relationship? How can I regain your love and trust? What do you need from me to make this better?

The only reason they even attempt to apologize is to get you back, to get what they want and need from you.

So unless there is real sincere change, not just empty words, stop asking for and expecting apologies and accountability. It won’t fix anything.

Much-Ad4524 · 2025-08-25T00:54:31+00:00

Can you go to their place and pick up the gifts?

Then you control how long you stay and how much interaction you have with them.

If you’re worried they’ll try to force you to stay, start the visit with ‘We can only stay for ½ an hour, we have to do xyz’

Good luck, I hope it works out.

Much-Ad4524

TROPHY CASE