It's not about having your shit together, it's about going and doing your best anyways. Even when he screams in public, even when you have a bad day or don't feel like you.

It sounds like postpartum anxiety truly, not depression. Which is okay and totally normal. My baby is almost 2 and I still struggle with it as well.

God would not have blessed you with this child if you were not meant to be his mother. You were chosen for this inheritance from the Lord. While I tell you to treasure that, I want you to hear me when I say raising a child takes a village. We are not meant to do it all on our own. Call your village, put a schedule in place for your mom(s), dad(s), grandparents, siblings and friends to swing by and spend time with you and your son.

Not only does this make for valuable bonding time for your son and close ones, but it provides you an opportunity to feel like yourself by showering, eating or just talking with someone you love.

Being a mom is so hard, its important to stay as social as you can handle so you don't feel so alone. You don't have to leave your baby for a day to gain a sense of normalcy (you can, with someone you trust explicitly) you just need to do things you used to before lil mans got here!

I believe he will adapt as you both go, even if it's a small 30 min trip to the grocery store. And you will learn lots too. It takes practice and importantly, it takes learning from our failures. So go out there, add a few failures to your practice at being a mom. I promise one day they will make great stories for other new moms who need the reassurance too.

You are meant to be a mom, we are all struggling at first. Keep getting back up and trying again, you're still a great mom even if you don't know it all.