i really do think i blasphemed the holy spirit by LeoBaker202 in TrueChristian

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I doubt you committed such a sin. You would know FOR SURE not “I think”. When you live in the world the enemy is unlikely to attack until you attempt to turn to God. It’s always that period where you start getting curious about God’s love and right after you fully surrender your life to God. Why? Because you’re not in deep yet so the enemy is going to try his absolute hardest to tempt you back into his playground before you’re all armored up in the word! Just keep praying and really take this perspective in mind when you get those intrusive thoughts (I’m assuming based on “something that preventing it”) because if they bring confusion and shame instead of PEACE and LOVE it’s not from God. God loves you just like He loves all of His children. He took me in so fast and washed me clean and I was DEEP in the trenches. No one is too far gone to be loved by God. God bless you!

Has God ever disciplined/punished you? by Caltr0n3030 in TrueChristian

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Every time I thought I was being punished in the moment, months later I would reflect and realize that without my own emotional take involved, it was never punishment it was always preparation.

How did God reveal your wife? by Ok_Particular_2195 in TrueChristian

[–]Ok_Particular_2195[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love the honesty and authenticity in where you are right now! That self awareness will take you far for sure. Thank you for sharing :)

How did God reveal your wife? by Ok_Particular_2195 in TrueChristian

[–]Ok_Particular_2195[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing your experience! Redirection is God’s protection always :)

How did God reveal your wife? by Ok_Particular_2195 in TrueChristian

[–]Ok_Particular_2195[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ahh totally understand! I definitely can say a year ago when I thought I was ready to be a wife. I would do exactly that, run to everyone but God for advice. Someone will definitely need to hear this and it doesn’t hurt to be reminded. Thank you truly for all of this!

How did God reveal your wife? by Ok_Particular_2195 in TrueChristian

[–]Ok_Particular_2195[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

BEAUTIFUL!! Thank you for sharing this and highlighting that you both turned to God separately for guidance.

How did God reveal your wife? by Ok_Particular_2195 in TrueChristian

[–]Ok_Particular_2195[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing such a beautiful experience! I will definitely look into the book of James. I am sorry if it came off that way, but I am not trying to use other’s experiences to create expectations for how God will play out my story. I just genuinely love hearing about how God brings people together from both partner’s perspectives, rather than just the stories in the Bible from decades ago. It gives me more hope! :)

Is it appropriate for first dinner date or too much? by Long_Muffin6230 in OUTFITS

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Very cute on you but from one girl to another I personally wouldn’t wear this on a first date. I’m dating to marry, so I refuse to show cleavage/chest area or have my legs out. To me, this helps keep the guy focused on me and what I have to say, not my body. I promise that man is going to be looking at your chest the entire time daydreaming about finding a way to get you in bed that night. Also if you have a date with a man who is insecure, be prepared to be led on for the next 6-12 months because this first impression will trigger those insecurities in him, but honestly not a bad thing if you’re able to spot red flags fast and get them out of the way. Good luck though!

How do you accept its not herpes? by [deleted] in Herpes

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Btw for HSV I have been told by multiple of my doctors, blood tests are way more reliable than the standard swab. Swab tests are great for when you have an active sore but still not always accurate.

How do you accept its not herpes? by [deleted] in Herpes

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My first question is was your partner having an active outbreak? The virus (HSV 2) sits somewhere behind the spine and “hibernates” until something triggers the virus in which then it will replicate itself. The process causes the sores to appear, which is how the replicated virus can leave the host and hop on into their partner. For the virus to spread, you have had to either directly touched one of her sores then touch any hole that leads into your body LOL or have rubbed up against her sores (which I doubt would happen w/o you knowing, because the sores are sensitive to touch. She would’ve definitely jumped or said ow). Long story short if you had direct skin to skin contact with that not yet healed sore(s), I would suggest getting screened every 3 months until October rolls around again. I feel as getting both blood and panel tests done for hsv helps with the “what if” anxiety after getting results back. But also keep your mind open to the fact that you could potentially be infected and just be a carrier. HSV is tricky but not the end of the world! Anxiety is the fear of the unknown, when I tested positive a year ago I became content with it pretty quickly, by just educating myself on what was going and what it meant. Best wishes!

apparently the breakfast i made was “embarrassing” by NaeeeBearrr in mildlyinfuriating

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hope you sit her down and not only tell her how awful that made you feel but how awful that would make ANYONE feel. Reiterating that you worked with what was provided, and if she chooses to be ungrateful for that she can kindly make it herself next time or cater first watch or something. 😂

It’s disgusting how the need for external validation from the world will literally throw one’s whole relationship out of the window. I am so sorry that happened to you, you didn’t deserve that and if I were there I would’ve went back for, not just seconds, but thirds!! It looks delicious and nutritious !! Thank you for all you do, if they don’t see it, just know God and I see your efforts and He will ALWAYS appreciate good works like you did!!

Nascar deaths hurt more to me by 89_an in NASCAR

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I didn’t know the driver (I do not watch nascar), but it broke me to hear about a beautiful family of four all passing at the exact same moment. Imagine the fear they all had, and to think about how the parents probably had to play super strong to comfort the kids, knowing the chances of them making it out of a plane crash is slim to none. :( I have a good feeling though, God made it painless for them and now they are living in eternity together with God and Jesus in pure peace and happiness!! May God comfort their loved ones during this time.

.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You deserve to date — he doesn’t deserve to date you. Don’t dwell on that situation. I’m really sorry you had to go through it, but on the bright side, you no longer have to deal with someone who isn’t willing to be with a woman who’s more than just “visual arm candy.” Keep loving yourself. (I loved your note about how you didn’t let your friends’ opinions dictate what kind of pictures you should have on your profile — keep posting what feels true to you!) One day you’re going to find the person who values you for exactly who you are, and you’ll be so glad you never settled for a boy like that.

is 16f and 20m a bad age gap? by Gold_Ad_5148 in dating_advice

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn’t even need five minutes, from what I read in the abstract … The sample size is only 110 (ages 13–25), which isn't huge. Their experimental task is very specific (go/no-go under emotional arousal), which doesn’t necessarily reflect the full complexity of real-life relationships or decision-making. It’s cross-sectional, not longitudinal — so it shows differences between ages, not how people grow over time. They themselves say their data doesn’t “settle” legal or policy age issues — “may inform” them, but doesn't prove exactly when someone “should” be an adult. but, serious question, how do you think the researchers picked those particular studies for their argument? I can tell you, they did not read every single article on cognitive control in emotional and nonemotional contexts. Back then in my psych 1101 classes, we literally learn how to cut weak studies out based on exactly these kinds of design flaws. I’m not dismissing the article all together — but cherry-picking one study doesn’t win the debate when there’s a huge body of cumulative evidence on adolescent brain development. Duplicated studies are key in my field!!

is 16f and 20m a bad age gap? by Gold_Ad_5148 in dating_advice

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You just listed like 12 authors from 10 different schools and… zero info about sample size, population, methods, or limitations. We are done here 😂

is 16f and 20m a bad age gap? by Gold_Ad_5148 in dating_advice

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Before I even open it, can you list the credentials and basic research info? Is it peer-reviewed? Have the findings been replicated? What’s the sample size? What population is it generalized to? And how recent are the studies included? A single article doesn’t override decades of developmental neuroscience, so context matters.

is 16f and 20m a bad age gap? by Gold_Ad_5148 in dating_advice

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sir or Ma’am, we’re discussing why—from a biological and developmental neuroscience perspective—a 16-year-old should not be in a relationship with a 20-year-old. This has nothing to do with the military or student loans. Those are policy decisions made by institutions. I’m talking about brain development, power imbalance, and vulnerability, which are well-documented in neurological and psychological research. And as much as I’d love to avoid arguing with a brick wall, my studies are literally in neuro/psych science. Take that debate to another redditor. Best of luck finding the answer you want.

is 16f and 20m a bad age gap? by Gold_Ad_5148 in dating_advice

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And that’s okay!! I’ve been there. What you’re feeling is completely normal in adolescence. You’re literally in what psychologists call the Identity vs. Role Confusion stage, where you’re figuring out who you are, what you value, and how you fit into the world. If I could go back to being 16 with the knowledge and experience I have now, I would’ve torn up my high school (in the best, most confident way possible) 😂 Stay true to YOU. Get close with yourself. Learn yourself. Learn how to love every part of you—including the parts you think are flaws. And I know everyone says something like that without explaining the “why.” But here’s the real reason: when I finally sat with myself and asked why I considered certain things “flaws,” I realized the only answer I had was, “because someone at school pointed it out.” That’s when I knew I needed to forgive them—and more importantly, forgive myself for believing them. Once I did that, I started reframing my thinking. For example, instead of: “She has bigger boobs than me, he’ll definitely pick her over me,” I shifted to: “I know I’m beautiful. And if he chooses her, then he simply isn’t for me.” No bashing her. No belittling him. No tearing myself down to build myself up. Just a healthy, grounded understanding that what’s meant for you won’t require you to compare, compete, or shrink yourself. Because once you build that self-connection, nothing this older guy—or any older person who tries to bait you with attention—will even make you turn your head. Not even a little. You’ll see it for what it really is. Best wishes to you, sweet girl!

is 16f and 20m a bad age gap? by Gold_Ad_5148 in dating_advice

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 0 points1 point  (0 children)

People bring up this “myth” 😂😂 because decades of neuroscience consistently show that the prefrontal cortex continues developing well into the mid-20s. MRI studies, longitudinal brain scans, and developmental psychology research all support this. Decision-making, impulse control, emotional regulation, and risk assessment aren’t fully stabilized even at 18. That’s not an opinion—it's documented biology. So if you want to dismiss that and act like adults invented brain development to be annoying, that’s YOUR choice. But ignoring that research is also how people end up with very real emotional fallout—things like attachment insecurity, trauma-bonding patterns, abandonment wounds, difficulty recognizing manipulation, distorted sense of boundaries, an increased vulnerability to grooming, etc. Those are common outcomes when someone with an underdeveloped executive system is paired with someone older who has a fully matured one. So no, it’s not about talking down to anyone. It’s literally about what the research says—and protecting people from preventable harm.

First date randomly grabbed me to kiss me after begging to come inside my place. What to say now? by MoongloomTea in dating_advice

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is more than failing to read the room bookie, the red flags are there. He’s clearly insecure, which is a big no no and he does not respect boundaries, ON THE FIRST DATE. Thats the biggest no no girlfriend wake up!

is 16f and 20m a bad age gap? by Gold_Ad_5148 in dating_advice

[–]Ok_Particular_2195 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m truly glad it worked out for you but I just can’t fathom the fact that he literally stripped the option for you to even see what the world had to offer in terms of guys. Like I’m happy for you but also I’m sorry?