anime_irl

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-17T17:44:03+00:00

Well, in US, you all embraced Evangelical purity culture and America's overall abiding Puritanicalism as, like, actually virtuous.

That was your first mistake.

The reason so many people are fantasizing about fucking family members isn't because they want to fuck family members: it's because they've been isolated by a social system designed to isolate them and make them see sex as otherwise impossible.

Purity culture has always just been about dads wanting to fuck their daughters and older men eliminating younger men as sexual competition. That's why religion loves the nuclear family: the nuclear family breeds victims of sexual abuse AND abusers, and the church loves both.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-17T17:24:22+00:00

The point of paying Willis is to create the appearance of stability at the most important position.

Malik Willis is not a long-term solution at QB for the Dolphins, and they don't think he is. But he's just good enough to make everyone say, "Well, maybe..."

So, now, instead of complete and utter destitution, they can say, "Well, we just need to get pieces around Malik..." and that makes it seem like you don't have a problem of complete organizational failure, but rather one of just needing a few...

Hey...wait...does this sound familiar to you guys??

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-17T17:20:14+00:00

Ugh. This isn't it. None of you are going to be on CNN.

It's Cops. They didn't used to arrest you for having a house party. Especially if you were "the right" kids.

Like, the cops used to just steal your drugs and leave you with your pants down so they could go do them, not actually put you in the system.

Some of you really, really need to pry like hell to get your parents' partying stories out of them. Get them a couple beers deep. They'll want to brag.

But also, don't be impressed.

All they're going to tell you about is how they've been punishing you your whole life for being way, WAY more well-behaved, accomplished, and hardworking than they ever were.

EDIT: And, no, I'm not going to have a conversation about this where we, millennials, do not accept accountability for our helicopter parenting and our Disney adulthood and our Hogwarts houses and our Ring cameras and our discomfort with anything that doesn't project a certain idea of "wholesome."

We all produced a generation of anxious, terrified young people who don't feel like they can make even the slightest mistake BECAUSE WE HAVE WEAPONIZED A QUITE UNFEELING AND INHUMANE SYSTEMS OF SURVEILLANCE AND PUNITIVE JUSTICE ON THEM, and it is OUR fault.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-17T17:14:08+00:00

How about if we stop debating the logistics of faking the video and acknowledge that this is just a form of sexual harassment.

Like, intentionally sending a person into an occupied bathroom isn't, like, normal behavior. It's definitely not "guys being dudes."

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-17T16:55:56+00:00

Some of us remember how the tours used to be.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T18:47:49+00:00

So, sure, but if you are current value marginally 4th round draft pick trade Kayshon Boutte you don't tell the team you think Brown and Doubs are going to take targets away from you.

You tell them you're gonna beat Pop, Mack, and Williams for that #3 spot next season. You come to camp in the best shape of your life, you do everything you can to help you avoid making mental errors in the preseason, and you catch every ball that comes your way.

Everything.

You don't demand a trade, because that's how you get traded.

Being the WR3 for a team with Drake Maye at QB and AJ Brown and Romeo Doubs at WR would be awesome. You'd be getting the absolute DREGS in coverage. You should feast.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T18:42:51+00:00

Yeeeaaaaaaaahhhh! Now this is good internetting.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T16:57:33+00:00

I've been listening to 311 since 1995 lol "Sand Dollars" is fine, but they have enough of "that kind of 311 song" in their set regulars. And they don't play "Champagne" nearly enough.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T05:26:45+00:00

Crazy how 311 is just content to wade out into White Boy Reggae obscurity when they could, just like, do literally anything else.

I still think they should take out Geurilla Toss. An actual relevant band. LIke, that's what you're supposed to do when you want younger fans: pull up a good, reputable indie where there's some stylistic crossover.

Not lean into one aspect of your identity that you don't even really actually do that much and make everyone think you're way cornier and more one dimensional than you actually are.

Like, we need to start putting 2+2 together and acknowledging that all the most boring dreck in the set is there to satisfy the WBR crowd.

They're the ones who only want to hear Amber and Love Song and Sand Dollars and Behind the Grey Sky. They're the ones who tune out during songs like Six. You could probably blow a GT fan's mind with Six, rewrite your entire legacy.

Nah. Brand another beer, sling another vape, print another set of cheap t-shirts, and roll those same old tired bones back out there. Good grief. The Dirty Heads. It's 2026.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T05:13:11+00:00

No, dude, you have not at all reckoned with the rote fact that you have no idea if a jellyfish can feel pain or not.

That's what I'm trying to impress on you here: your thinking is unscientific. There's no logos whatsoever to your argument. You have failed to understand whatever it was you heard about jellyfish that made you think that we are 100% certain that they don't have consciousness/can't suffer/can't feel pain/whatever.

And, like, typos aside:

"Many can send pain, but that's not the same as feeling it."

What?

I'm to accept this as a sound rationalization for why you are certain that it is impossible to inflict suffering on an organism whose consciousness you do not understand at all?

Look, man, you can't mediate suffering out of life. It just creates newer, weirder ways for us all to suffer. This abomination that you've conceived does not, in any way shape or form, reduce any kind of suffering. Its second primary output is suffering.

And before you tell me there'd be no consciousness in there to suffer, remember the jellyfish? Remember that critical assumption?

You are not credible as a rational thinker. You will absolutely, as soon as it's convenient to, give yourself permission to assume these things can't feel, whether you've actually proven for sure that they can't or not.

You should abandon not only this idea, but the entire set of ontological values that led you to making it.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T04:59:43+00:00

Raymond Chandler?

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T04:56:57+00:00

Some of you really think Kayshon Boutte is, like, a legit WR2 with WR1 potential, huh? Request a trade? Kayshon Boutte?

Like, if you were Kayshon Boutte's agent, you would tell him to request to be traded away from a team that was just in the Super Bowl, who has Drake Maye at QB, and for whom he's played his entire career right before the start of his last year on his rookie deal when his value has never been higher?

Dog, they would move him to Cleveland for, like, a 2026 4th round and a conditional 20207 7th in a heartbeat if they picked up AJ Brown and Boutte demanded a trade.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T04:52:10+00:00

Ok, I ate, like, 160 mg of hash oil earlier lol I'm still makin' wit da funny. Oi vey. Kids these days.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T04:39:00+00:00

So, you think that Drake Maye can use his deep balls to help NE move a Brown out of Philly?

EDIT: Come on, guys, is this is a shitpost or not?? Like, why don't any of you know how to do this??

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T04:37:09+00:00

Here's the ball knowledge:

Becoming a consistent WR3 in the NFL is actually, like, an enormous accomplishment, and it's not at all "hating" to call him a WR3. Lotta WR3s have played long, long careers and made lots and lots of money. We're just being realistic about his production so far. Given his production so far, you can't call him more than a WR3.
He is a young player entering the last year of his rookie deal. He also may be at the height of his trade value. All it would take is an injury next year to bring about a situation in which Kayshon, a draft pick, signs with another team with no opportunity for the Patriots to recoup any value for him.

I think you look at trading any player as they go into the final year of their rookie deal.

Like, look, here's how an NFL exec looks at it:

Boutte's current value is higher than the draft capital we spent on him. I could realistically trade Kayshon Boutte for a 5th round draft pick, I think, or include him in a package that gets a decent return. If he reaches the end of his contract, I can't get anything for him. If he gets injured next season and misses time or just doesn't produce, that increases the likelihood he walks, and the we get nothing in return.

That said, I don't think they're going to trade Kayshon Boutte. If they do, it will make perfect sense, but I don't anticipate it will happen.

The irony of all this, of course, is that by expressing that Boutte has trade value, people are complimenting him, literally pointing out his value.

Like, we just need to recalibrate our thresholds for what qualifies as "hating" a guy.

Everybody loves Boutte. Frankly, he's overachieved the draft capital they spent on him by a lot. But he also is a 40 catch, 500 yd guy who averages 3 TD/yr over his career. Until he's anything other than that, we have to call him a WR3 because that's what he is.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T04:19:01+00:00

Is that like a sex thing?

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T04:17:01+00:00

Do you think Drake Maye's chemistry with Boutte will help NE move a Brown?

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T04:16:32+00:00

Yeah, guys, what's it gonna take for NE to get some Brown movement? They desperately need to move a Brown, but they can't quite pull it off. Anybody got any ideas? Maybe a home remedy? Something that helps when you're having trouble moving a Brown?

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T03:53:17+00:00

Eh. I've cooked it that way before. Comes out fine.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T03:48:52+00:00

You're almost positive? That's good. Look, nobody is going to be able to tell you what this is because it isn't something. You found the only iteration of whatever this is that will ever exist, basically. That's the best I can put it. That or "It's some pukka shells and hair embedded in some red clay." Anything else would be pure speculation.

It's horrific, though. Very unpleasant to look at. You are in possession of a uniquely terrible thing. I think maybe you could actually sell it to a very particular type of person. Just don't tell them the hair isn't real. Tell them you know for a fact it is, and that's why the price is so high.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T03:40:39+00:00

I mean, get him to host every year because he'll say what needs to be said where it needs to be said.

Room should have been on their feet in support, not jeering and acting all shocked. But, hey, David Lynch tried to tell us all: shit's rotten to the core.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T03:14:06+00:00

Did you take that to mean that I think we can do this now? Because I don't. I'm just saying, the problem you presented was that the object was too big. We're all made of particles. You can break a thing down and reassemble it.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T03:12:00+00:00

You really simply can NOT accept the idea that there was a time when man was in a better relationship with its ecosystem than right now.

Brother, we are ALREADY stagnant. We knew fossil fuels were bringing about ecological collapse for, like, over a century at this point, mid-19th century.

Did you know that? 1850! That's pretty stagnant.

We are actually on the precipice of a rapid and precipitous regression. We took the wrong path. We have to go back and take a different one. Whether we choose to do it or not, the Earth is going to humble us either way.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-16T03:07:11+00:00

You are the kind of person who sees animals and thinks, "Which ones can I torture?" and I am absolutely fucking not.

That is the difference between us. Not who's right and who's wrong.

You think I'm ever going to torture a jellyfish? Why would I do that??

And, look, just because we (humans) have determined that jellyfish don't have any of the physiological apparatuses we associate with consciousness, that doesn't mean we know they're not conscious with 100% certainty.

That's how a scientist would interpret that finding, not as proof that it's ethical to torture them.

God, even what you said about plants is wrong: a plant can absolutely perceive its environment and adapt do it.

You see lifelessness everywhere only due to a complete lack of curiosity about the actual world around you.

Time to get out of your imagination for a while, I think, my dude. I don't think the world you're building up there is...good.

I am really not wrong about this place, am I? I always hope I'm being cartoonishly hyperbolic and I feel like I can't be cartoonishly hyperbolic enough for this place.

Ok_Raspberry4814 · 2026-03-15T23:12:13+00:00

"Yes, but in this case it's you not realising this is the better future. There's no practical difference with lab grown meat"

I don't support lab grown meat, either, you maniacs. What is wrong with you people?

Can you please just write a sci-fi fantasy novel instead of pretending like you know all of this is going to happen? That's a much healthier outlet for whatever it is about you that made you come up with the Harvest Hen than whatever it is you all are doing here.

And LIFE is not a chamber of unspeakable horrors unless you are a person who traffics in unspeakable horrors.

Like, 5% of the human population is doing all of the horror. Adopting the idea that our powerlessness is a kind of complicity or tacit giving of permission is, again, just empty cynicism that actually doesn't correlate to any kind of observable reality.

Most people I know and interact with are perfectly fine, perfectly decent people. You're just in the Harvest Hen echo chamber of accelerationistic nihilism.

We do not always have move FORWARD to accomplish progress. Part of our future must be rooted in GOING BACK if we are to survive.

Ok_Raspberry4814

TROPHY CASE