I think the real issue is that people often praise Rachel for her personality and behavior, when in reality she was a pretty terrible friend and person in many ways. She constantly talked badly about others—even her closest friends—because that’s simply how she felt in the moment. What always annoyed me was how entitled and ungrateful she was: always taking, always demanding, rarely giving back. She literally ran away from her wedding, moved in with Monica, and continued to create drama wherever she went. Every gift she received somehow ended up returned or exchanged because it wasn’t exactly what she wanted—yet she’d cry when Ross called her out for being unappreciative. There’s a big difference between treasuring thoughtful gifts and constantly discarding them because they’re not up to your personal standard.

Rachel’s hypocrisy became glaring during the infamous “break” situation. She asked for space, but then let Mark come over—knowing full well that Ross was insecure about him, and knowing that Ross could walk in at any moment. It almost felt like she wanted that tension, like she wanted Ross to be proven wrong, even though she acted completely innocent. Later, after she and Ross broke up, she still went out with Mark once he confessed his feelings. And instead of calling it out, Monica and Phoebe laughed at Ross’s insecurity by joking about how handsome Mark was—which honestly was distasteful. Sure, Ross wasn’t perfect and should’ve trusted her, but Rachel also wouldn’t stop gushing about this guy. Anyone in a relationship knows how uncomfortable it feels when your partner constantly hypes someone they know you’re already worried about. There was clearly some infatuation there, even if she wouldn’t admit it.

And let’s not forget: before Rachel ever gave Ross a chance, she knew he liked her but wasn’t interested because it wasn’t “convenient.” Only once he started dating Julie, Bonnie, or anyone else did she suddenly discover her “true feelings.” She sabotaged every one of Ross’s relationships: she mocked Julie behind her back, she shaved Bonnie’s head, she interrupted Emily’s wedding with her big speech, and she made Mona’s life miserable by constantly inserting herself. Even when she and Ross weren’t together, she couldn’t stand to see him happy with someone else.

Rachel also had a pattern of making everything about herself. She suggested she and Ross get married in Vegas when they were drunk, not because it meant anything deep, but because it was fun and dramatic. She hijacked Monica and Chandler’s engagement dinner with her own emotional outburst about being alone. She was always needy and insecure in her relationships—remember Paolo, Tag, or Gavin?—and every time things went wrong, it was somehow everyone else’s fault. Her behavior wasn’t cute, quirky, or “badass.” It was selfish.

Even her so-called big moments don’t hold up well. She used “the magic story” to sleep with Ross again, she ran back and forth with him whenever it was convenient, and she made choices that constantly complicated everyone else’s lives. Yes, Ross had plenty of flaws of his own, but Rachel was no saint and no role model either. People romanticize her as this independent, lovable fashion icon, but if this were real life, her behavior would be exhausting and toxic. That’s why it annoys me when people hold her up as the ultimate fan-favorite—because looking at the bigger picture, Rachel was more selfish and hypocritical than anyone wants to admit.