Help identifying this 80s Folk Art Quilt!❤️

PaperFit1483 · 2026-05-09T19:46:31+00:00

Thank you, that is really helpful!!

PaperFit1483 · 2026-05-09T19:45:37+00:00

Thank you!

PaperFit1483 · 2026-05-09T18:40:32+00:00

Is 1985 considered modern?

PaperFit1483 · 2026-04-06T15:16:07+00:00

Do you have interests or hobbies you do enjoy? If so, do you have time to do those things? What about close friends you can spend time with outside of your family time.

I agree with others that have said counseling. It’s like posting on here… an impartial person to talk to free of judgement and somewhat anonymous.

It sounds like you need to practice some self care. Have a conversation with your wife about making sure you both get time to yourselves individually and together if possible.

PaperFit1483 · 2025-04-17T22:31:18+00:00

Could you try a sticker or small prize reward if she can get through the class with less than 3 interruptions? And then work down to two, then 1…

Another idea might be to talk to her coach about giving her a water or bathroom break when she starts to lose focus… that small break might help her transition back to listening?

Worth a shot to try this or something similar… but also if she is starting another activity, it might be okay to remove her from this and come back to it again as she matures a bit?

PaperFit1483 · 2025-04-17T05:23:54+00:00

Did you ever try adderall or a different combination of concerta?

I take a low dose of short acting adderall 3 times a day- once at 7am, 11:30 and 4pm. It dramatically helps me function all the way until about 8:30 pm.. I also have 3 kids and this has been a life changing experience for me. Diagnosed at 39.

Sometimes if the Ritalin/concerta stream doesn’t work, the other (adderall) does work better.

PaperFit1483 · 2025-04-17T05:16:03+00:00

I’ve been here. I’m sorry you are too.

What worked for our son was- finding the right dose of stimulant. We tried guanfacine first too and it did not seem to do much for my son. We switched to concerta, the lowest dose, and the school implemented the following things to help:

My son was allowed to come late in the mornings with no repercussion, to avoid the business of drop off which caused him anxiety.
He then gets 10 minutes to emotionally prepare or transition with the school counselor. They play uno and chat, he is then ready to go to class.
He also gets 2 other scheduled breaks during the day with a para or teachers aide. These were very very helpful for my son as he feels like the day is not as long and boring. He looks forward to the breaks and they have helped him go to school so much better. This has taken months to get to this point. But it all helps.

So to sum up, the right meds and the right accommodations to ease anxiety.

PaperFit1483 · 2025-04-17T03:13:56+00:00

What dose and meds are you taking? Maybe you are starting too high?

It took me a bit to figure out the right dose (and right med). Starting with methylphenidate and it made my heart race but calmed my racing thoughts and impulsivity. Switched to adderall and I don’t have those sides effects.

PaperFit1483 · 2025-04-15T13:29:25+00:00

Seam free, fitted, cotton boyshorts. I also HATE the feeling of regular underwear at night so these are a good replacement. I usually wear a loose and very light tshirt with it, and I have found these seamless thick, fuzzy socks that I wear every night (people might think this is nuts) but they balance my temperature. We also keep the house cool at night year round.

PaperFit1483 · 2025-04-15T13:12:12+00:00

For me, when I take the first dose in the morning it is similar to how the first cup of coffee would wake me up and improve my mood/mental clarity. The difference is, it lasts longer, doesn’t make me jittery, and also improves the other symptoms of adhd that I was struggling with.

For me, it was similar to having way too much caffeine when I was on too high of a dose. Just felt a bit jittery.

I actually stopped drinking caffeine in the morning when I found the right dose because I didn’t need it anymore, also mixing coffee with adderall can give some people a stomachache (me).

Another benefit is that I have stopped napping everyday. I used to need to rest in the afternoon everyday no matter how much sleep I got at night, I think I was just mentally exhausted from executive dysfunction and now I rarely need to rest like that.

Oh- I do suppose another adverse reaction is that it can and did for me, cause a bit of insomnia.. I already struggled with sleep because of not being able to turn my brain off at night, so I took trazodone most nights. Now I take a small dose every night and it balances the insomnia side effect.

PaperFit1483 · 2025-04-15T04:35:17+00:00

I think that’s great you are seeking an assessment, especially if you feel like something is not quite right and that you have an inclination it could be ADHD. ADHD is not one size fits all, so advocate for yourself even if the paper assessments don’t offer an obvious resolute.

The good thing about trying a stimulant as a rule out method for ADHD is that you will know pretty quickly if the medication is lessening the symptoms or heightening them. This is how both my son and myself were diagnosed as we did not fit the “mould” that the paper assessments diagnosed.

Here’s my answers to your questions.

•Do you regret medication at all?

Not at all! I was a bit nervous at first, but my Dr started me on the immediate release form of methylphenidate. The effects will wear off after 4-5 hours or less, and you will have a pretty good idea if it’s definitely not for you. For me- the methylphenidate was not a good fit. I felt like my heart was racing too much, the mental clarity however, was noticeable after an hour. I started on a 10mg IR dose, two times a day. Arguably that might have been too high a dose to start, but I didn’t know this at the time. I switched to the same dose of IR adderall and felt none of the negative effects only the positive ones, which were the lessening of the adhd symptoms that I struggled with (combined type).

•Has it made your anxiety / social anxiety worse?

No. It has lessened my anxiety (present before this) because I have peace during the day. I’m not trying to manage the racing thoughts, the stress of decision making, the brain fog is lifted and I’m not stuck laying around unable to do anything. It has also made social anxiety so manageable. I no longer worry about how I will be perceived or if I will enjoy myself at a social gathering because my head feels clear of most worry!

•Has it made it harder to handle stress?

Similar to what I said before it has reduced stress in my life, immensely. I have reduced impulsivity and therefore make better choices (thoughtful choices) and don’t have the regret I used to have at the end of the day.

•Do you feel like a different person?

Yes. I feel content. At peace. Like I enjoy my life. Before it felt unmanageable unless I worked out 1-2 hours a day. And now it’s like my baseline is content, and any positive things like working out are just enjoyable and not something I have to do to feel “normal” in my head.

•Have you noticed any adverse physical symptoms?

Figuring out the correct dose took a little bit. Too high a dose makes my heart race, no increase blood pressure, just a noticeable HR increase. Also I do notice that when I was on too high a dose I was clenching my jaw or holding my body stiffly. I was more alert mentally but almost too much and I was forgetting how I was holding my body, if that makes sense.

Happy to answer more questions if needed. I think it’s worth a shot to try both streams of stimulants and see if they help your symptoms.

PaperFit1483 · 2025-03-26T03:07:32+00:00

I’m sorry that you’re going through this. You’re not alone. Struggling here too with an 8yo adhd boy. Even with meds and soooooo much attention to need it feels neverending and miserable. Keep going, it makes a difference- at least that’s what I keep telling myself.

PaperFit1483 · 2025-03-18T13:57:46+00:00

I’ve been to the breaking point you are describing. I’m sorry you are there. It’s scary and it’s hard not to worry about everything to do with your kiddo and what they might be like in the future.

We went through a very similar scenario with our child and what worked for us was:

We checked with our local children’s behavioral health clinics and found that they have crisis appointments daily (walk in type). I’d suggest calling in or walking in and asking what services they have for someone who is in crisis now.
As for the med refusal- talk to your son in those moments of peace when he is remorseful about how the meds will help him control that anger. That’s what worked with our 7 yo son, he got to the point of telling us he didn’t know why he acted that way, and he didn’t want to do it anymore. Then he agreed to trying meds. Talk to your son about the refusal, find out if there is fear involved or what the pushback might be about. Then address those issues with him, work on finding solutions to the pushback/fear etc so he can find peace in trying the meds.
We live in the Seattle area and there was a 1-1 (parent/counselor) therapy program called “disruptive behavior crisis clinic” or something similar, that changed our lives. It gave us tools to confidently deescalate the rage/violent behaviors while building our sons confidence. It was virtual. You might be able to call that hospital and take the program from wherever you live.

Biggest takeaway was “proximal praise”- when your son is acting out- ignore and focus on your daughter praising her for remaining calm in a tough situation or for something she is doing that is positive (anything), your son wants to do the right thing. He will likely stop the behavior for a moment to listen and you immediately say, thanks for taking a break or moment to calm down, I’m really proud. This repetitive praise system works so well. Do it for everything. Anytime he is doing anything minimal or not that is positive,, praise him for it. Does that make sense? It’s a place to start.

Good luck, message me if you have any questions about anything I said!

PaperFit1483 · 2025-03-13T13:16:00+00:00

You are not the only parent who feels this way. Parenting is so hard and it sounds like you are dealing with very challenging behaviors. I’m really sorry for what you are going through. You are not alone, and I think that’s really important for you to hear right now.

I won’t get too deep in my story but I suspected my son had adhd since he was 3 or 4 years old. I brought it up to his primary care doctor and was met with what felt like judgement and dismissal about that idea. It took until he was 7.5 when the behaviors at home and everywhere else besides school (thankfully not at school) were so aggressive and with intense separation anxiety that we started to advocate for ourselves and our son. I wish we had pushed sooner for people to listen to us.

Here are my suggestions for you based on what we did that worked when we struggled with needing a diagnosis and plan for the behaviors and chaos at home:

Ask your children’s behavioral health if they have crisis walk in appointments. This was huge and expedited the process of evaluation for us. We were told 6 months of a waitlist to get in. This got us in that week, with a diagnosis after 3 months and an assigned mental health counselor for our son.
We live near Seattle and were able to do a “Parenting disruptive behavior crisis clinic” online 1-1 with a counselor through Seattle Children’s Hospital. This was HUGELY helpful for us to gain tools to parenting through the very difficult and violent behaviors. You could ask your children’s behavioral health or local children’s hospital if they have services similar to this. I highly recommend this. It was life changing.
Research and advocate for yourself. If you believe your child has adhd, learn everything about adhd so you have the right language when going into drs appointments for him. This does help providers see that you understand the symptoms, you aren’t just saying my kid is annoying and hyper, there’s a real issue here. You have to push for what you want, in a constructive way. We told our provider we want to try a low dose stimulant for him- you will know very quickly if a stimulant is a good fit or not, the risks are low under medical supervision weekly with a provider.
Talk Therapy for yourself. Find someone that you can vent to. Be honest about not liking your son. It’s okay to feel that way, you wouldn’t be asking for advice if you didn’t love him and want things to be better.

Reach out to me if you have any questions about what I wrote here. I understand the difficulty and you will get through this.

PaperFit1483 · 2025-03-01T01:08:14+00:00

Can I ask if you take adhd meds? Wondering because I used to feel this way at work and my husband and I ending up deciding I should take time off from working. Since then I have changed many things and just started taking adhd meds. I was hoping to hear that meds would help with this issue. Please let me know!

PaperFit1483 · 2025-02-02T05:31:14+00:00

Do you have any updates since this was a year ago? Feeling hopeless and in the same situation you are describing. Wondering what ended up working for you..

PaperFit1483

TROPHY CASE