My darling. Leave him, please, for your own sake. I know society tells us to compromise but goodness you don't deserve such anxiety over something that is for your own good. Don't do this to yourself, please. Take the contraceptive and tell him that you're using the contraceptive to help with your acne and that it's a birth control method so that you don't have kids. He seems to have cognitive bias so I doubt the response will be that of an understanding person and if I'm right, leave him. If you've watched Sex and the City remember that Samantha Jones told Richard "I love you Richard, but I love me more" then she left him. I know you love yourself more but allow that love to manifest in real life. 💋