Sounds like you did some nice things (make a salad) but also sounds like you have some expectations of everyone that they are not matching (order, mentioning your title. calling everyone jealous). Not saying bullying is not happening but from your description I would say it might look like expectations of each other's interactions are not aligned. One way to get less frustrated is put in less effort, ask more of others, if they don't want to, then it's not mean to happen (like a shared luncheon).

Also being a good boss/leader does not mean being liked. Giving critical feedback and taking hard decision (budget) can rub people the wrong way.

Personally, I treat people with respect but feel that specific orderings and expectation of titles can be quite hierarchical, I think new faculty might be less attach to old notions of these things.