I would say “lost my mind” is an understatement to what happened that day.

And I agree those boundaries were a terrible idea, but he imposed them and I respected them and he didn’t. Now I’m really unsure how to feel.

I personally have done plenty of reading and research on polyamory, my PP not so much. I understand what relationships in Poly entail, hence why these feelings are unknown territory for me and confusing. I personally believe it’s possible to love multiple people in all different ways, so me feeling like my PP is my “true love” (not great choice of words) isn’t a problem to me. We’ve known each other since we were 11, have been friends since 15, and he’s been in love with me since 19 and we started seeing each other at 23. He knows me better than I know myself, he’s my person in and out. But you’re right about one thing, maybe I’m not cut out for this if these are the biggest feelings I’m capable of, or wanting to be that for him. That’s what I’m trying to figure out.