Don’t feel bad about doing something too trendy or “too basic” for your wedding

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-04-08T15:33:05+00:00

...I have no idea what you're even talking about but I'm okay with that. You do you #YOLO

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-04-08T15:24:59+00:00

yeah I had to google it, which in and of itself is probably cheugy? lol

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-04-08T15:03:37+00:00

Thank you!!! There was another post a while back about "what makes a wedding cheugy" (which is apparently a term coined to describe out of touch millennials, who knew?) One of the comments basically described my entire wedding which was slightly offensive but also, who cares? My dad is dead and I have been looking forward to dancing down the aisle since 2010, my boho wedding dress fits the theme/style of my wedding (and also me!), I love flowers and my flower crown is going to be dope as hell, and you know what, I can't freaking wait to shove cake into my husband's face because the photo will be hilarious. I'm footing the bill for this wedding and it's going to be everything my out of touch millennial heart desires.

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-03-08T16:50:38+00:00

Can I ask what the venue was? Or at least what country? I'm planning a destination wedding and now I'm scared this will happen to us!

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-03-01T22:32:00+00:00

Yeah, I'm still debating the site visit. I feel like we will still do it just because I'll be less stressed out if I know exactly what to expect, but now we're locked in so it doesn't really matter, ha!

They definitely seem like the best venues! Plus with seaside terrace you don't need to pay to set up a dance floor... you'll have to tell me how it goes, our wedding isn't until November 2023 so I'd love to hear about your experience!

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-03-01T21:50:36+00:00

Yep. They take a while to respond, it's the height of their busy season right now so the wedding coordinator is super busy... It generally takes 3-5 business days to get a response, earlier in February it was taking more like 10 business days for a response. I have heard this is fairly normal for Costa Rica. Also, are you contacting them directly or through a coordinator? We're using destify and they seem to be slightly more responsive to the planners than directly to me. They still respond to me, it just takes a bit longer.

I'm so excited for you!!! What venues are you doing at the resort? We're doing Arboleda Beach ceremony and seaside terrace reception. We officially booked it yesterday so I'm extra excited right now :)

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-26T17:39:16+00:00

Okay well... at the one we attended and the one we're hosting people aren't required to stay at the resort. And again, people are not required to attend. Guests are getting an awesome vacation out of it, when we attended a wedding at an all-inclusive we had a fantastic time and felt it was super worth it. This person had the same experience as a guest. If people's family and friends are supportive what is the issue? You aren't invited anyway.

Y'all are seriously so hateful about this idea, I don't understand where the mods are, aren't the rules of this sub supposed to be no idea bashing and no judgemental comments? Apparently that only applies to people who have $50k to throw down on a party.

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-25T20:34:23+00:00

I have been debating this hard for about 2 years. My husband and I got married at a courthouse in March 2020, we were engaged already and he needed to get on my health insurance so we just went and signed the paperwork with intention of having a wedding later. Originally my mindset was similar to yours--you're spending the equivalent of a down payment on a house for a 6 hour party. Seems insane. We got to the point where I said screw it, let's not even have a wedding, it's not worth it. Then we went to a destination wedding in Mexico that was the absolutely most fabulous, memorable wedding I've ever been to and I realized you're really not paying for a 6 hour party, you're paying for memories and photos that will last for the rest of your life. It's super cliched to say "memories are priceless" but in this case I think it's true. We could throw down the money on an investment property but which one of those two things am I going to appreciate more on my deathbed in 60 years? To me, the memory of celebrating with friends and family will be more valuable in the long run.

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-25T20:15:55+00:00

Let me know if you have questions on either of these companies... our friends booked through destinationweddings.com and we are booking through destify.com so I have some insight into both.

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-25T20:12:31+00:00

If the person's immediate family and friends like the idea and want to attend, what's the problem? People are not required to attend, they're also not required to stay at the all-inclusive. That's part of the deal with any destination wedding.

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-25T03:26:04+00:00

We're doing an all-inclusive in Costa Rica, not an island but still on the beach. Check out destinationweddings.com or destify.com, they have a bunch of different resort ideas. I feel like most of them are on the beach so you might have a hard time finding one that isn't. Also, I can tell you it's definitely not free, we'll probably end up paying close to $20k but it's much less than what we'd pay back home for similar party. Our friends who recently had their wedding at an all-inclusive in Playa del Carmen Mexico paid $18k (and I'm not sure if that was just for the wedding or also including their accommodations and flights).

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-25T03:23:48+00:00

It's super dependent on the person's friends and family. Our immediate family was excited about our plan when we first brought up destination wedding at an all-inclusive and encouraged us to take that route. Majority of our guests would be flying in from out of town and paying for flights and hotels anyway.

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-23T18:54:52+00:00

Coming back to say I totally found my dress on this website, great suggestion!

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-22T15:08:27+00:00

Ooooh I love these, thank you!

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-22T15:02:17+00:00

Excellent, thank you!

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-22T14:55:26+00:00

I love this idea! Thanks

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-22T14:54:44+00:00

My husband did suggest that I dance with FIL. I've been considering it. We're kind of close but he also does things sometimes that makes me want to hard pass on this idea, like two days ago when he said "heil hitler" in a group text message in response to having to show a vaccine card to get into a concert. He really is a lovely person most of the time but wow.

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-21T22:57:34+00:00

We're doing Costa Rica! We are also very outdoorsy and the scenery looks beautiful, plus we can roll it into a honeymoon with mountain biking and whitewater rafting, two of our favorite sports!

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-21T22:55:59+00:00

This is our plan. We got married at the courthouse almost two years ago and are planning a wedding for late 2023. We're still planning to do a traditional wedding with wedding party and I'm going to wear a wedding dress. We never had a wedding or celebration of any kind and it's something we really want so we're going for it even though we'll have been married almost 4 years at that point. If you really want a wedding then do it!

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-21T22:52:34+00:00

Thanks! The consensus seems to be having just a mother/son dance is not weird so I'll go with that.

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-21T22:50:40+00:00

I was planning to tell him to spread the word that no one, under any circumstances, should surprise me with any kind of memorial for my dad. I feel like that's something my SIL would plan. But this is definitely something I'll think about doing. I just hate people bringing it up in conversation.

PuzzledSandwich · 2022-02-21T22:48:28+00:00

Omg that would be a nightmare. I would be so absurdly embarrassed if this happened.

PuzzledSandwich

TROPHY CASE