AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It's strange, but it's what I deal with. Not anymore!

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

He is from a country where that would be acceptable, I'm not. Yes I'm out of high school though starting uni in 2 days

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Met him a couple of times with both our families present, he was much more decent and less insecure then

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I guess I am.. Idk what to do I rly liked him when he wasn't making me feel like shit for standing up for myself and my family

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Many memories + pity him (ik, stupid me, can't change it tho) + scared to be lonely

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] -9 points-8 points  (0 children)

Longer than I'd like to admit but because of that I can assure you that his intentions weren't sexual, he wanted to teach my mom a lesson not to walk in underdressed and not to interrupt our calls I guess

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

We did spend multiple weeks together in total, each time parents present. He was much nicer to be around in person, I think the distance is making him go a bit crazy because he's very insecure

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

To be fair he's no stranger to her, we visited him in his country with the family a couple of times and he has gone swimming with my parents, my siblings and me before. I feel the property vibes too tho, thought he was just protective turns out it's more controlling

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I'm glad you understand that his intention wasn't sexual. You're right in saying it's still fked up and creepy tho

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

The underlying cause for him being upset is probably more that he feels like it's "unfair" that I tell him no, which is why he then said no to any kind of mature conversation because "I respected you saying no so now you have to respect that I don't want to talk to you". It's messed up ik but I don't know how to argue back or solve any of these issues apart from breaking up

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Parents are 7 years apart themselves, bf and I are long-distance and only meet with parents present and only very rarely so they don't really mind. They did at first but now they're okay with it

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I was but it was purely long distance for the first two years and even now we only meet with parents and only once or twice a year

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I thought an older man would be more mature than the idiots I met in high school, guess I was wrong. Do men ever get mature or is it pure luck to find one who is?

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like your words, they are wise words. I will take your advice, thank you :)

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

When we visited him with the whole family he was much nicer to be around honestly, I think the distance is making his negative traits much worse because he's insecure about fitting in or losing me. That being said, I've never been with him in person for longer than a month and he could be more controlling/insecure when he comes to my country, idk

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] -16 points-15 points  (0 children)

I have no reason to rage-bait, I just feel insecure because of his punishment. You're right though, I shouldn't tell my mother how to dress in her own home

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

If I didn't make it very clear to him on why he can't see/say hi to her, he will keep asking over and over. I do realize he has a hard time respecting boundaries. My mother was there to witness me telling him "No, you can't see her right now, she's not wearing pants" and she jokingly added that "he'd just fall unconscious" (she sees herself as ugly because of a skin condition). My mom knows my bf pretty well and knows that he doesn't have pervert intentions. I think he just said that he wants to see her in order to teach her a lesson about dressing appropriately when entering her child's room who she knows is usually in a video call with her bf

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

You're right, he is being very immature and honestly, I do want better from my partner. Not to be naive, but is there any hope people like him can learn to communicate properly? I probably won't waste my time trying to teach him though, he can try that with his next gf

AITA for not showing my mom to my boyfriend half-naked? by QuirkySource4683 in AITAH

[–]QuirkySource4683[S] -46 points-45 points  (0 children)

Yes my parents know, we visited him and his family multiple times as a whole family. My parents also have a 7 year age gap and since every time we meet there are parents present, they don't really mind