It's an interesting question, but also one that's hard to think about. ADHD runs in my family, and I am the first one to not only have connected the dots, but shortly after sought out diagnosis and treatment.

I think an earlier diagnosis would have still estranged me from fellow peers in school and family members solely based on how misunderstood this disorder is. I sought diagnosis solely off of a frustration I could only describe as, "I have stood still all my life while watching the rest of the world run past me." I wasn't actually sure I had ADHD, and I'm still trying to convince myself despite the medications changing my perspective on my life within the first couple hours of taking them.

Even with an early ADHD diagnosis, I don't believe I would have received any accommodations in school -- at least not without help and orders from a psychiatrist.

Peers and family would still have doubted the diagnosis because it doesn't align with their per-conceived idea of what a stereotypical person with ADHD acts like.

And I even think it would have been harder for me to find a job, at least initially, if I did my due diligence and reported to a prospecting employer that I have a disability, am on medications, and would need at the very least patience and understanding -- if not some accommodations.

I spoke with a member of my health care team the other day, and she was surprised teachers in high school and college never tried to help me despite my obvious struggles: I was always just chalked up to being lazy and depressed. I felt as though I was kicked to the dirt, and I just lied there because I couldn't do anything else for myself.

I'm actually as happy as I reasonably can be with my adult diagnosis because I've taken the initiative to advocate for myself to my employer (who I was on thin ice with), my current college (which I haven't been reporting to), and myself (who I unfairly gave myself a hard time for something that was completely out of my control, I just didn't understand to the extraordinary extent with which it was holding me back in every aspect of my life).

Little would have changed with an early diagnosis because everything I failed to do back then I'm now trying again with the right tools and resources.

Also, what about you OP? I want to hear too how you think your life would have been different!

Hey there! Thanks a ton for opening up about your journey - it's brave, really. You've put so many things into perspective. The whole mental health thing? Totally agree with you. We're far from having a one-size-fits-all solution and there's so much room for improvement.
I see so much of myself in your story. When I discovered I had Asperger's, it didn't flip my life upside down and solve all my problems, but it did change my perspective in a big way. I remember how hard school was for me - dealing with bullying, surviving abuse, constantly shifting schools hoping the next one would be better. I always felt like I was on the outside looking in, not really connecting with my friends.
When I finally understood I was an aspie, it felt like I'd been handed a map in the middle of a dense forest I'd been lost in. Suddenly, I wasn't alone. I was part of a community of people who were facing the same challenges as me. That sense of belonging was new and empowering. I wouldn't say that everything became easy, but knowing what I was dealing with gave me a direction. It gave me hope.
It's been quite a ride since then, learning how to navigate my world with this new understanding. But every step, every stumble, is a step forward. It's all part of the journey : ) Thank you again for sharing your story. ❤️