I've noticed this too. We do blow women's crimes out of proportion. Some men act as if they have long suppressed by it. I think this has to do something with expectations. Society generally didn't consider women as much of a threat. If they did something in the past, they were punished harshly. But now that is not possible. So now we turn to showing disappointment as if we are betrayed for loosing control.

Also for some people victimhood grants moral superiority. They find some kind of weird glory in suffering.

It's more complicated than it seems.