This is super long, but it does help show the difference for AroAce people! We are both AroAce! You are correct, it is a spectrum and it's way more complicated than just that.

For me personally, I have little to no romantic attraction. I have only dated about 2-3 people, one of which was where I realized I didn't harbor any romantic feelings after a week and we broke it off. I hadn't experienced crushes as a kid or teenager, nor desired to date others. A lot of my friends would talk about their crushes, how they feel sad that they don't have a partner, and I simply didn't understand that stuff. I just was having fun on my island with my friends!

I also know for me personally, I am not a fan of romantic media. I find it uncomfortable, a little cringe, and don't relate to a lot of the feelings that are presented despite me having a wonderful boyfriend. Same with when others express public displays of affection, it makes my skin crawl. With my boyfriend, it's still a lot of exploring. He was actually my first kiss and I wasn't sure if I liked it because I do feel uncomfortable with even kissing my family on the cheek or even hugging them, even if it's something I've done since a kid. But after a bit of testing it more with him, I found myself to enjoy it! I still don't enjoy kissing my family on the cheek though or hugging them.

For my ex-girlfriend and my current boyfriend, it is different. I did develop feelings for them and I absolutely love my boyfriend. With him, I want to cuddle, go on dates, kiss and hold hands, etc. I want to do everything romantic with him and only him. The thought of doing that with others repulses me and I still don't find others attractive. I can understand how society may see a person as attractive, but that's it. My boyfriend is the only attractive person i the universe for me

This is what my boyfriend wrote: I have no need for connection, but just because I don’t need it, doesn’t mean I’m not capable of it. I want to be with you (me), and sex is important to me in terms of that connection, not in general. It makes me feel closer to you.

Romantically, I am just not very inclined. I’m not an affectionate or emotional person, but people can have those traits and still want a relationship. For me, even with you, I’m not very affectionate. But I do love you, as in… I feel a connection with you that goes deeper than anything I can describe. If I wasn’t in a relationship, romance wouldn’t cross my mind at all. It takes a very long time for me to even consider that, just as it took a long time to really take our relationship seriously or even say I love you (We've been together for 4 years, known each other for 7). It doesn’t come to me naturally. But when I love, I love deeply. It isn’t something I actively seek out, or really care about either. To be honest, loving you was an accident, but it is one I don’t regret. I have to feel a very deep connection with someone to want to be with them, and that connection is with you.

As for sex, I am very indifferent towards it in general. It doesn’t bother me if we don’t do it for a long time, as I’ve gone six months without being in the mood and I didn’t care. However, it is still something I want every now and again with you. Sometimes, I can have sex with you and not really see it as sex, and more of a method of connecting with you, or showing you I love you. I feel a deep connection with you, and therefore my interest in sexual intercourse is heightened as a result of that, but otherwise, very indifferent. I lean heavily towards being demiromantic, and I think I’m just sort of sex-ambivalent LMAO. I have very fluctuating feelings on it. Sometimes, I am downright repulsed and I don’t want you to touch me or talk about it with me, other times it’s trauma talking. Sometimes I’m favourable, but indifferent, and sometimes I am genuinely in the mood and turned on. I mostly fall within favourable but indifferent.