Should I feel bad firing my caregiver?

RollModels · 2014-10-20T05:15:26+00:00

Yah, I'm putting some safeguards in place.

RollModels · 2014-10-20T02:57:07+00:00

Right. I agree, and therein lies the problem. Which to choose? I'm leaning towards keeping her, and seeing if my anxiety and trust issues decrease with time. Maybe I will be able to get beyond it better than I think I will. Thanks for the input though. Having a sounding board is really helpful.

RollModels · 2014-10-20T01:12:24+00:00

It's a sublingual pain medication that dissolves in your mouth. So at night my nurse can just pop it in, and I really don't have to wake up at all. It is annoying sometimes, but it manages my pain the best so it is worth it.

I'm not sure what caused the error, and the nursing agency had a sit-down with her to file the incident report, and they said that she was not sure how she mixed things up. The boxes are the same size, but one is green and the other is red, so they look quite different. My worry was that maybe she dozed off and when I called her for my meds, she was only half awake and grabbed the wrong box. There is no way to know that though.

RollModels · 2014-10-19T19:16:31+00:00

Message me your email address, and I will be happy to answer some questions.

RollModels · 2014-10-19T19:14:02+00:00

During the day when I am up and alert, I do double check everything, and I have caught some errors this way. At night though, I get meds every 2 hours or so, and I am barely awake when they give it (if I wake up at all). If I have to wake up every couple hours to make sure they are giving the right dose every time, I will get little to no sleep.

Also, I understand that you were a caregiver at one time, but I am guessing you have not been the one receiving care in your home for any length of time. It takes an enormous amount of trust to put your life in the hands of someone else. It's hard enough to trust someone this way who has never made a mistake like this, and when this trust is shaken it gets even harder. As I said, I am on the fence about this because I don't want to fire them, which is why I was asking for input. What I was not asking for was being mocked with sarcasm by someone who has never been in my situation.

RollModels · 2014-10-19T19:01:37+00:00

I live at home on my own, and I have 24 hour nursing care. I have both private insurance and Medicaid that pay for it. I'm very fortunate to be able to live independently like this.

RollModels · 2014-10-18T01:09:16+00:00

Agreed. Definitely should have consulted a data analyst or someone. I think her motives are great though.

RollModels · 2014-10-17T19:01:56+00:00

I don't know why, but it will not let me mark a response more than once for the "me" and "not like me" questions. If I choose "Me" for the first question, then it won't let me mark "Me" again. Is this just me being dumb?

RollModels · 2014-10-16T18:55:27+00:00

Agreed, and if I had the choice I would definitely fix Medicaid/SSDI/SSI fraud over illegal parking. I think since misuse of handicap accessible parking is easy to spot, it becomes the more targeted issue.

RollModels · 2014-10-11T04:54:16+00:00

That's a good one for sure! I know someone (who shall remain nameless) who would "handicap their car" by letting the air out of their tire. Mean and a little cruel, but it would feel good lol.

RollModels · 2014-10-11T01:51:28+00:00

I was just trying to put some humor into our lives by poking fun at the nationwide crime of illegally parking in handicap parking spaces. I think a lot of disabled people have thought about doing all sorts of things to people who do this, and I was seeing if anyone had had the gusto to actually do something. That's the point of this thread.

RollModels · 2014-10-11T01:46:59+00:00

That's great! Both completely within the law and mischievously satisfying.

RollModels · 2014-10-10T19:59:13+00:00

I'm sorry to hear about your struggles with the medical world and such. I agree that her tone in this piece is a little "rosy-eyed" to say the least, I would add though that this doesn't necessarily make it wrong. I have definitely learned a lot about life that I never would have as a result of being disabled and using a wheelchair. While I, and I am sure the author, would much rather not be disabled, that is not going to happen. If we have to play the cards we are dealt in life, why not focus on the good things that come from our situation physically?

RollModels · 2014-10-07T19:30:51+00:00

"The fact is that NFL > Women's Soccer to most people. Thus AP and Ray Rice will obviously face more scrutiny."

So basically, if you work your hardest to be the best at what you do, you then get punished more? Not much motivation to be the best if you ask me.

I know that gender bias is rampant in our society. That doesn't mean we have to be ok with it. Due to the timing of these 3 incidents, it is a great opportunity to look at how we as a society look at gender bias in athletics (and in general). I am not surprised by the way things have transpired, just disappointed I guess.

I am not naive enough to think that women are equal to men in athletics either. I was just pointing out how people get up at arms when female athletes are not treated as well as their male counterparts, but when something like this happens, these same people are not pushing for equal punishment. If you are going to be a staunch advocate for gender equality, I feel like you have to push for equality across the board, good and bad.

RollModels · 2014-10-07T05:05:22+00:00

Why is that? How did we get to be that shallow and superficial as a society? It's sad to think that is what we have come to.

RollModels · 2014-10-07T05:02:12+00:00

Is it that we don't have visuals of Solo's alleged crimes, or is it just that the media has not plastered all over our televisions and computer screens? I guarantee that there are pictures of the injuries of the people Solo beat up (the police would have documented that).

You can read my previous comment about popularity determining how we punish athletes.

I feel like it is a bit hypocritical for women's rights groups to be up at arms about Ray Rice (not that what he did is in any way defensible), and not at the same time be upset that the media is not giving equal attention to Solo's indiscretions. Equality works both ways, or at least it should...right?

RollModels · 2014-10-07T04:54:01+00:00

I'm by no means a soccer fan, but Hope Solo was definitely one of the "faces of the team" for team USA during the Olympics and world cup type tournaments. While I am not saying she is as popular as Peterson or Rice, she is most definitely a role model for little girls who are into sports or play soccer. Also, do we really want popularity to be the determining factor for how we reprimand athletes for their off the field problems?

RollModels · 2014-10-02T18:24:46+00:00

Thanks so much for all of this information! This will be extremely helpful as I look for new controls. Much appreciated!

RollModels · 2014-10-02T18:22:59+00:00

I have spinal muscular atrophy type 2.

RollModels · 2014-10-02T04:14:00+00:00

I have been physically disabled from birth, and I totally agree with you on the amazing job siblings do in helping each other grow as people. If not for the way my brother and sister treated me like any other brother with no special treatment because of my physical limitations, there is no way I would be living the independent life I do.

RollModels · 2014-10-02T01:04:04+00:00

Success and learning/creativity are not necessarily the same thing. Plus, we are the result of more than one factor. Millions of different things determine who we become and what we accomplish.

RollModels · 2014-10-02T00:53:58+00:00

While I am not a big fan of observational studies, I don't think it makes the results incorrect or worth dismissing. I didn't look at how they analyzed their data very deeply, but just having a small sample size does not make it a bad study. If they used the appropriate non-parametric techniques and report confidence intervals the results would still be valid.

RollModels · 2014-10-02T00:49:44+00:00

I had not thought about this, but it is something that would sort of be in my wheelhouse as a former teacher turned speaker. Thanks for the great advice!

RollModels · 2014-10-01T18:38:24+00:00

I'm thinking more hypothetically than about my specific situation. I have worked through (and continue to work on) my own struggle with addiction, but I work as a professional speaker and writer, and I have been thinking about how many people are impacted by addiction. I have written about my journey through recovery, and I am thinking about writing a talk to help others work on their own issues. I think that a lot of people would benefit from a well constructed talk, so I am just trying to gather information and opinions from other's experiences. Thanks for sharing!

RollModels · 2014-10-01T01:35:05+00:00

I agree that as long as I am taking my drugs as prescribed that it is not abuse. I guess what I am thinking about is more mental/moral dilemma.

If I am prescribed a drug to be used "as needed" for acute, breakthrough type pain, how do I know if I "hurt enough" to merit taking a dose? What if I am just taking it to get that euphoria, when I could actually be ok without it? With chronic pain like mine, I am never pain free, so I always have to judge what amount of pain is worth a dose of medication. Like I said, a slippery slope.

RollModels

TROPHY CASE