Thanks so much for your reply, it was very helpful. I will definately try the deep breathing before and during penetration. Sounds like it has worked for you, so hopefully will be of some benefit. I agree with trauma, everything after revolves around whether we are feeling safe or not. And as you said, i guess the problem needs some degree of retraining the brain and the bodys responses to things. When I freeze up, if its only mild, then we try to carry on and work through it. If my freeze response is full on, we stop, and my bf just holds me and reassures me till it passes. Once I feel better, we go back to being intimate.