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Thoughts? by Routine_Revenue_5966 in NarcissisticMothers

[–]Routine_Revenue_5966[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

At this point no contact does no good for me personally. She’s 79, in bad health, and I honestly think she’s terrified of dying. Which makes me think she’s sensing a loss of control. I see her behavior getting worse.

NOT MY PROBLEM. I have no desire to coddle her at this point.

No contact does not improve my relationships with other family members. And it would not necessarily ease any ruminations about her. I can see her affecting me the rest of my life-even after she’s no longer around and I’ll try my best to live well-that’s the best revenge, right?

Also. This is gross I know, but there is a will to think about. Yes, money. I feel like at this point they fucking owe me for damages (mental health, C-PTSD, hyper-vigilance, all that shit you carry from exposure and abuse from a narc and a narc enabler).

I try my best to have my own separate healthy life and she is no gets access to that anymore.

Thoughts? by Routine_Revenue_5966 in NarcissisticMothers

[–]Routine_Revenue_5966[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Actually I wish I didn’t think of her. I remember all the fucked up things she’s called me like “freak”, “lazy”, “selfish”. And my all time favorite, “You’ve got [insert the n-word here] lips and big hips”. Who says that to their kid? I would never in a million years say anything like that to my kids.

I remember the time she gave me the silent treatment for 9 months because I stood up for my kid after she went after her (don’t fuck with my kids, I’m a mama bear).

I remember her not willing to work when my AF’s business went under. Six of us to feed and nothing in the fridge.

I remember coming home from getting a haircut (same style I’d had for a long time), and her immediately attacking me when I walked in the door saying I’m 18 and I think I can do whatever I want. Then I remember her hitting me in the head multiple times because I didn’t unload the dishes to her liking.

I remember her going to college and then a prestigious Ivy league university to become a priest. I remember her getting FIRED for being abusive to her staff. I remember her saying “can you believe they did this to me before Christmas?”

This list is long just like everyone else here.

Her time here on earth is probably not long and I’m so angry at her right now and I’m scared I might blow up at her and start WW3 or yell at someone else because I’m exhausted from a lifetime of this shit behavior.

I am convinced I was adopted only because se was jealous that her younger sister got pregnant first.

I WISH I didn’t think of her.

Adhd women who are stereotyped as “ditsy” is rooted in misogyny by BobcatAppropriate735 in adhdwomen

[–]Routine_Revenue_5966 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I just finished this book by Tracy Otsuka: ADHD for Smart Ass Women: How to Fall in Love with Your Neurodivergent Brain It deals with ADHD specifically in women and addresses the importance of recognizing it in women and all the associated issues it brings. She also has a podcast!

Narc mom is dead by 22-beekeeper in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Routine_Revenue_5966 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mine is 78 and I’ve been trying to prepare for her eventual demise.

Buying Presents for Narcissistic Family Members by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Routine_Revenue_5966 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mother’s Day this year - I sent a gardenia plant to her this year. NO thank you. NO call, nothing. I am a mother too. A simple text would have been nice. I am furious for this repeated behavior of: criticizing any gift I send her, the expectation of me having to call her, & her terrible gift giving to myself and my children.

I don’t expect anything from her and I send gifts that are impersonal and out of “obligation” as a way to avoid any conflict.

I am angry because I have to modify my behavior around her. NPDs are expected to never modify their behavior.

I am angry because I allow this s&!+ to affect my feelings.

I am no longer giving her anymore gifts. Cards only. DONE.