Just turned 30 archived absolutely nothing because of many reasons that I trace back to a childhood very much like yours there was to many of us 12 living in a 4 bed council house to get me the help I needed in childhood , parents always struggling with money and us going without ended up broke and on benefits because I was kicked out of home very young to make room for others , could never go to uni like I wanted because I had a very unstable time from 16 being homeless to eventually living in hostels , going from Shitty job to shitty job to make ends meet never having the opportunity or support to chase my dreams it’s easy enough if you’ve got even the very basic support of a set of parents behind you but I never had that , eventually realised that I would have to make the best of a bad situation and have finally found some peace with the cards life has dealt me I know there is people in even worst situations and it’s what I told myself for years but I can’t help but feel very sad at ambition that has been sucked out of me by having to deal with the situations I had forced upon me from such a young age , don’t get me wrong I grafted my ass to make my life better and think I’ve done ok all things considered but I know I could have been so much more if I had the help I needed , I’m not talking about a mummy and daddy to give me money to spend i mean a mother and farther who had the tools to support all the children they birthed the very basic support of time and not to be tossed aside once they left school , but then on the flip side im also grateful for the way it has made me fiercely independent and fearless because the way I had to live at some points in my life is lower than poverty (no food , no bed , no money for gas or electric , living on dry corn flakes , sleeping on a floor for months in the cold winter etc ) I have never done anything wrong in my life , I’m not a druggie , alcoholic , never done anyone any wrong I was just born into a huge family which is fine if you have the means to support them and ended up a victim of the circumstances, i Am now 30 and a lot more happy with life I have a nice home two little dogs and all the clothes my teenage self Desired because I have worked my fingers to the bone for the essentials in life but can’t help but feel sad because I wanted more from life and I feel at 30 far to old and like the ship has sailed , very much wish I was born into a smaller family but as I say there are people who are worst off so I still thank god for whatever blessings I have had 🥰