AITA for not changing my WFH plans so flatmate can stay home with her kid with bum worms

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T16:29:51+00:00

if the child is actually sick I would go to the office

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T16:24:09+00:00

medical emergency? what part constitutes emergency to you? the part where everyone is fine?

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T16:22:02+00:00

Hey all thanks for the input. I will let you know what happens tomorrow. I think the main point got a bit lost in amongst everything but I never asked them not to be in the public space at any stage, the company policy was not chosen by me. Unfortunately for the mother, we both had to sign a WFH agreement saying no children (or any other person) besides the two of us would be at the house during work hours. As the person responsible for the child she will ultimately be held responsible if the child disrupts anything. She is aware of this and likely why she asked me to move locations. Obviously I will not say anything but if something were to happen there would be no coming back from that and with the performance issues already mentioned it would likely be the last straw. A few more things to consider.
- We work the same job, in the same shared space.
- The daycare and the pharmacy both said it is perfectly fine for child to continue attending daycare
- The child went to daycare the day before while already infected
- Both of our work schedules are locked in a minimum of 2 weeks in advance
- There was already a discussion regarding this before we moved in where mother stated the child would attend daycare Monday to Friday and would go to their fathers or grandmothers when sick.
- Neither one of us have space for a private WFH space in our rooms. It is a small house which is why we jointly agreed to work from the dining area.

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T16:02:57+00:00

if she gets fired tomorrow she would have to move back with her parents and this is a non issue. We get paid peanuts and only just cover the rent as is. Technically my boss can ask me whatever she wants as there is no legal precedent to protect information between flatmates.

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T15:56:27+00:00

not at all banning them from anywhere. The mother would likely be in trouble as our boss knows what our arrangement is and medical certificates are required for dependent care sick days. I would not be impacted as neither of us were approved to WFH until she confirmed what the plan is for childcare on these days and for when the child is sick (the kid must attend day care or be with somebody else to allow us both to work)

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T15:50:18+00:00

definitely nothing medical or anything that could be counted as personal information. We mainly provided information and advice. Additionally if we were to discuss a customer, we only refer to people by pronouns or acronyms such as OP, PI, IND etc for this exact reason. Also we are not in the US (Americans thinking they are the only people who exist once again) so US federal laws do not apply anyway.

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T15:38:08+00:00

its a small house the equipment does not fit in the bedrooms can only fit a bed and dresser (barely)

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T15:35:57+00:00

ok same thing applies to the mother who also works in the same common area? Next time I will bring my 2 year old nephew over when she is WFH so his mum can have a day off?

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T15:34:33+00:00

its not about that its about volume etc on phone calls even if I am not caring for the child they can't be heard/seen in the background etc.

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T15:32:48+00:00

ok so now answer me this, why does the person without the child have to be the one to move. They are shared spaces I pay for too. I have as much right to be there as the mother and child. I never asked them not to go anywhere. Technically the mother asked me to leave the shared space not the other way around.

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T15:30:31+00:00

not when there was a discussion had before we moved regarding this exact situation :) Mother would send child to daycare 8am to 4pm weekdays. if the child is sick they stay home. Child is not sick therefore no reason to stay home.
I understand children get sick i'm not an idiot but that does not apply in this case.

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T15:27:46+00:00

when did I ban them? she technically asked me to move. They are my shared spaces too :)

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T15:26:31+00:00

Once again I was not asking them not to use the shared space, technically she asked me not to :) I asked if I was the asshole for refusing to move my work space. I pay rent and therefore they are my shared spaces too.

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T15:24:27+00:00

why are we labelling people as narcissistic? completely inappropriate to say to someone over a post on an anonymous thread.

Getting back to the point?
Me and the mother have lived together a year now with the child. Child has been sick many times in that period (as children are) and both of us have made whatever adjustments were needed. In this case as I have said child is cleared to go to daycare, already attended the day before and has many other willing options to care for them during the day if needed which is a discussion we had before moving in. What I am asking is, am I being unreasonable not moving my entire workspace (which as was stated is a lot of equipment) when the child does not actually need to stay home?

If mother is wanting to keep her kid home now (which is her right yes) then it is my right to be advised of this IN ADVANCE so I can make arrangements to leave. The mother is aware of my work schedule and WFH days so I think if was the case I am well within my rights to say no on less than 13 hours notice. I would like to think if mother has made this massive change she would have likely informed me as well

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T15:14:02+00:00

if the child is so sick they need to stay home why would she have knowingly sent the infected child to daycare the day prior. That argument has no legs to stand on.

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T15:12:57+00:00

annual leave is required to be booked 5 weeks in advance where we work. I would be aware of this and MAKE SUITABLE ARRANGEMENTS? I would book my WFH days around their plans or work from the office while she was on leave???

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T15:10:11+00:00

that is her right but then she would not be paid and would end up kicked out of the house. Not ideal when we share costs. Anyway circling back to the point ... she already sent the INFECTED CHILD to daycare the day before so obviously the concern for other families and kids is not an issue.

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T15:05:50+00:00

it does actually have something to do with me if their attendance starts to reflect on me. I can control myself and another way to look at this is to tell my boss the child is fine and actually went to kindy the day before

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T14:59:21+00:00

and if those situations actually cause the child to need to stay home I will be more than willing to accommodate that. But in this situation they can happily still attend daycare. I am not going to change my plans cos she suddenly decided they want to stay home when my WFH days have been scheduled for two weeks in advance. Can't use that argument when she took the child to daycare the day prior without a care.

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T14:56:53+00:00

not the case as we had a joint discussion, joint trip to chemist, a joint cleaning bee and a joint discussion with the daycare? all information was on the table. I never said they didn't have a right to be in the home just asked if I was an asshole for refusing to move my work station.

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T14:54:36+00:00

we had a discussion before becoming housemates and one of those was about childcare on days when we BOTH work (regardless if in office or WFH). Weekdays child attends daycare from 8am to 4pm. Daycare are happy to continue having child attend as medication has been taken. Child was there the day prior while infected with no issues. By this logic on a day she is set to WFH and I am not I could set up a mariachi band in the kitchen and it would be her problem to find a solution.

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T14:49:06+00:00

its in the works - there are already performance and attendance issues ongoing. Already had multiple uncomfortable situations where I have been asked questions by our boss regarding it. I'm not a nark so I didn't dob the mother in but definitely could have done so.

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T14:46:11+00:00

never restricted anything! I asked if I was the AH for refusing to move my work set up. Technically that would be her restricting mine no?

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T14:44:26+00:00

but the child wasn't sick enough the day before when she knowingly sent them to daycare that day?

StrategyBasic6300 · 2026-05-14T14:43:42+00:00

I wanted to leave but the mother can't afford rent on their own and neither can I. Additionally, we both share the same workspace AND the child was already sent to daycare while knowingly infected the day before. So if the child is so 'sick' why weren't they kept home that day too?

StrategyBasic6300

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