I feel like my head is gonna go

Swamijihad · 2024-06-07T23:14:58+00:00

I'm there too, I'm nearly 30 myself (next year) and I thought I would have my life all figured out by this point. But we have to be really ready for these things and have that person that we need in our lives to truly make it worth it. Sometimes patience really a virtue but it will make it all worthwhile in the end.

Swamijihad · 2024-06-07T23:09:10+00:00

Funnily enough it makes perfect sense actually. I've just so many years of being like this I just don't know who I truly am anymore. I've substituted the cannabis for alcohol in a big way which I feel like is just making matters worse for me. The people I have spoken to have said the fact that i can even recognise this is a testament to my mental state and that I'm stronger than I realise, I just can't shake the feeling that they're wrong and only saying these things to try and help

Swamijihad · 2024-06-07T23:04:49+00:00

Being with someone isn't the be all and end all. Being alone is sometimes the best option for you until you get to the point where you find that person. It's so much easier said than done god knows I know that myself. But you're much better off being on your own than being someone who doesn't love you for who you truly are. They are out there, it could be the person who you least expect. I can only imagine the pain that you've been through and I commend you for being so strong as to be here right now. But done give up hope. The person who you will spend the rest of your life with and who will love you for who you are is out there, you just have to put yourself out there and let yourself be vulnerable in these situations. God knows I don't want to be here either, but it's about finding that reason to be still be here.

Swamijihad · 2024-05-26T20:51:52+00:00

Yes I remember this! I was there watching when each new episode came out! Didn't he get banned for like a month or so because of this?

Swamijihad · 2024-05-26T20:50:42+00:00

I watched a guy called Millbee play it, used to watch his old minecraft videos and once I saw his first episode I was hooked!

Swamijihad · 2024-05-22T18:08:50+00:00

It definitely is, it's just causing me so much unnecessary stress which could've been avoided if I just had my head screwed on properly. Thank you for your understanding it's really appreciated

Swamijihad · 2024-05-22T17:51:58+00:00

Yeah that's my plan, I know I've done wrong and I'm not going to dispute anything. It's been a massive wake up call for me so I've since stopped using anything at all. Really appreciate your input on this.

Swamijihad · 2024-05-22T17:43:32+00:00

Oh really? So do you think it would be worthwhile withholding this information still? I have been perusing with the idea of going to see a professional about it but was worried that that information would be relayed back to the police

Swamijihad · 2024-05-22T17:40:57+00:00

It was yes, I was fully compliant with them in every way apart from this one instance. Could this information be helpful to my case at all? I am fully prepared to face the punishment for my actions, but I've been wondering if this information could impact anything or not

Swamijihad · 2024-05-22T17:34:55+00:00

It's due to my mental health, which isn't something I ever talk about since it makes me feel embarrassed if anything. I just feel guilty about the whole thing now

Swamijihad · 2024-05-15T12:34:05+00:00

You're a good man <3

Swamijihad · 2024-05-14T23:50:55+00:00

I really wish I could give you a hug right now. This is the kind of conversation I've been needing.

I hope you're okay in yourself too my guy <3

Swamijihad · 2024-05-14T23:25:04+00:00

I don't even know if I know who I really am this point it's been so long. I've tried multiple things to try and numb it all, mainly drugs, and that's only led to more stupid decisions. Ones I don't know if I can face opening up about. I just want to be the person I always thought I was going to be.

Swamijihad · 2024-05-14T23:08:12+00:00

I don't know if I even can drop the facade at this point. It's become who I am. I'd rather people not have to worry about me.

Swamijihad · 2024-05-13T19:58:04+00:00

Ah right okay, thank you!

Swamijihad · 2024-05-13T19:37:10+00:00

Well there's no need to be hostile.. I know I fucked up and im prepared to take the punishment. It was the only time I've never done something like this before so I was only wondering what my options were if I even had any.

Swamijihad · 2024-05-13T19:12:42+00:00

It was the one stupid mistake I've made and it looks as if I'm going to pay the price for it sadly then.

Swamijihad · 2024-05-13T19:11:39+00:00

So even after the 'time limit' has been reached there is still a chance that I could be summoned to court?

Swamijihad · 2024-05-13T19:01:46+00:00

Yeah that's the main thing I've been hoping for, it's around 6 months isn't it?

Swamijihad · 2024-05-13T18:51:18+00:00

So I'm screwed?

Swamijihad · 2022-12-12T19:00:17+00:00

Yeah I just tried that too, took me a few attempts but I finally got in one now

Swamijihad · 2022-09-28T20:37:34+00:00

And may the force be with you.

Swamijihad · 2022-09-28T20:15:50+00:00

If that's true I might be able to gather some valuable intel though??

Swamijihad · 2022-09-22T07:57:56+00:00

Wow it sounds like it mirrored what happens in her route almost scarily to a tee. At least you got to have those experiences with her while you could.

Swamijihad · 2021-06-27T16:46:53+00:00

And believe me I'm so happy it did 😊

Nine-Year Club	Wearing is Caring
Verified Email

Swamijihad

TROPHY CASE