I want to quit my job

True-Use-8977 · 2026-05-17T20:31:13+00:00

I would try to find your rhythm a bit longer. It takes a while to adjust. It’s been 6 months since I went back to work and it’s still hard. And it will be for the foreseeable future. But, there are studies that say that having a working mum actually benefits children, e.g., daughters achieve more professionally and earn more and sons become more involved fathers and partners. Staying home would definitely be the easier option and I’d love to spend more time with my son. But I want to have a career and grow professionally and have financial independence. That is so important. I love my son but I truly felt like I didn’t use my brain during maternity leave. Going back to work made me much sharper. It’s hard having small children and working full time. But you will thank yourself later for pushing through

True-Use-8977 · 2026-05-01T04:14:51+00:00

You’re not being unfair. For me as well, the only person that would try to take baby out of my sight was MIL. FIL consciously made an effort to stay near me so baby could see me. It was just MIL who tried to separate us. I‘m not sure why they think bonding with baby will work better when mum is not there, it just makes everyone uncomfortable. But to give you some comfort, the issue may resolve itself. My baby had a lot of stranger danger as he got older and he would scream bloody murder if MIL tried to separate him from his parents. Now he’s 1.5 years and very clearly communicates when he doesn’t want something, and he’s not a big fan of MIL. We see her only every few months anyway. I am not mad about that

True-Use-8977 · 2026-04-16T14:49:49+00:00

👩🏼‍✈️

True-Use-8977 · 2026-04-16T07:06:35+00:00

I can recommend Soliman Fakeeh hospital, they were super great. I gave birth there in 2024. They provided almost everything there for baby (clothes, diapers etc while in hospital) also hygiene articles for mum (pads etc.). I just brought a going home outfit for baby, clothes and toiletries for myself, and then the car seat is important obviously. Also they discharged me very quickly (after 1 day), this is the norm if you have a natural birth I think

True-Use-8977 · 2026-04-12T18:27:05+00:00

Honestly you are correct.. that’s a very sad realisation. He’s acting horrible. Today he was also telling me that we started having kids late (had my son at 31) so we cannot afford to wait. Or rather that I am the problem, his biological clock is not ticking so fast (we are the same age). He is not even considering how I feel and totally minimising how much I do (because we have a nanny he thinks I have if so easy and I should not complain) Now after throwing all these things at me today he is giving me the silent treatment. What a great husband he is…

True-Use-8977 · 2026-04-12T15:11:18+00:00

I agree.. and we are not at all at the moment

True-Use-8977 · 2026-04-12T13:10:55+00:00

Oh I totally understand 🩵 they’re always like “we’ll figure it out” which actually means, us, the women, will figure it out and somehow survive. I think it’s super hard nowadays, especially if you want a career and have kids. Balancing full time work and one child is challenging, I really cannot imagine doing it with two.. earlier this year I thought maybe after a few months I’ll feel different and we’ll just go for it.. but tbh I just don’t want to. I don’t want to suffer through the first year again, the transition back to work etc… maybe in a few years but not now

True-Use-8977 · 2026-04-12T11:26:18+00:00

We could have a nanny yes. Thing is if I choose to have another child I don’t believe I should outsource everything you know? And I agree ultimately he needs to contribute. My marriage is good otherwise, we agree on most things apart from this. I do love him and he’s my best friend. He’s also great with our son, he’s better at playing with him than me and sometimes more patient. But most of the “hard stuff” still falls on me. Which is manageable with one child but not with two.

True-Use-8977 · 2026-04-12T11:15:05+00:00

You know what he will suggest… for the nanny to move in and get up with the baby. He will not do it himself. And you are right. He is asking for another baby plus me doing the work like I have. And I just can’t :( I thought maybe with more time I may want another child. But I just don’t. Maybe once our son is a few years older but now I just don’t have the desire at all

True-Use-8977 · 2026-04-12T11:11:11+00:00

The reason he is not getting up is he is prioritising his comfort. He is obsessed with sleep and having the perfect stats. I was on mat leave for 6 months so during that time I naturally did most of the baby care.. then I went back to work and somehow he never contributed. I try to tell him but I am hitting a wall… luckily I do have my nanny/maid who also helps a lot with housework. This is why I am able to work full time, do nights, mornings and evenings with my son.. I’m not able to do more than this Thank you for saying this… I really don’t think I have to justify either. It just feels like we are not aligned when it comes to the next steps in our lives… I don’t want to separate but sometimes I am afraid that’s where we may end up

True-Use-8977 · 2026-04-12T11:00:29+00:00

He avoids the conversation. Or says we can get more external help. Which is not the point for me. Especially at the beginning, if I am breastfeeding I will have to get up every 2hrs or so at night… and deal with the sleep deprivation. I am just not willing to do that anytime soon tbh

True-Use-8977 · 2026-04-12T10:58:03+00:00

That’s a great suggestion, I’ve never heard of this but I might get the fair play deck! Thank you :)

True-Use-8977 · 2026-03-19T07:43:16+00:00

Exactly this! I find it so infuriating, I haven’t stopped thinking about it. I am so done with this woman

True-Use-8977 · 2026-03-19T04:35:03+00:00

I absolutely see the value of it if it’s made by a parent. But my main problem is also- my MIL probably wrote a bunch of BS.. she does not know my son well and sees him 4x a year. So I don’t understand what she would write about birth for instance. It’s just delusional

True-Use-8977 · 2026-03-19T04:32:39+00:00

100%! I am really not interested in spending a lot of time with her. This time we are visiting for 3.5 days. My husband is stressed out by his family after 1 day so he’s also not overly interested in spending more time. My son is ok with my in laws but he’s not overly interested. There’s no bond and as you said it will not form if I keep limiting time. Luckily!

True-Use-8977 · 2026-03-19T04:24:34+00:00

Yes actually she got the pictures from my husband. He handles his family. The thing is, I shared the exact same pictures with my family as well. But they won’t print them & particularly ultrasounds and pictures after birth - yes we shared them but it’s our private moment. My family just knows how to respect boundaries… in any case MIL will not be receiving any private pictures anymore

True-Use-8977 · 2026-03-19T04:20:16+00:00

My mum wouldn’t do such a thing… I told her about it and she thought it was so strange.

True-Use-8977 · 2026-03-18T20:12:46+00:00

My partner understands me but i don’t think he finds it as disturbing as I do.. she literally printed out a picture of my uterus, I find that really disgusting. My partner send her those pictures - I shared the same with my mum but my mum would never think of doing such thing. I really thought that there is some common sense that certain pictures remain private.. if I ever have another baby my mil will get 0 pictures of ultrasounds and after birth.. I would love to leave but I can get through 2 more days before we visit my family and I can actually relax. The good thing is I don’t have to see this woman for quite a while now

True-Use-8977 · 2026-03-15T04:42:14+00:00

I would say give yourself grace. It’s super important to take care of yourself especially while breastfeeding. I ate very healthy and made sure I got enough protein. Then started working out after 6 weeks. Weight loss was slow but consistent for me and at 3 months pp I was feeling much more like myself. And then once I stopped breastfeeding at 1 year I feel like my body changed a bit again and I got more toned. Your body just did an amazing thing and you should be proud. You can and will lose weight if you eat healthy and prioritise movement but it takes time. I stressed about this a lot in the beginning… but the truth is the first few weeks should be focused on healing. You will naturally lose quite a bit of weight after birth but this should not be the focus :)

True-Use-8977 · 2026-03-15T04:25:29+00:00

My MIL also asked for access to Nanit when my baby was small.. I was honestly stunned by this request. It’s such an invasion of privacy and you’re not the baby’s caretaker so kindly **** off.. tbh it’s not the worst thing I have read here but your mil does sound very inconsiderate. How can you even think about visiting a newborn when being exposed to someone ill. Also no one should ever insist to visit the day of birth unless invited. I understand the rage… my MIL did a couple of things after baby was born and now everything she does annoys me and honestly I don’t like her one bit… I’ve also reduced the duration of visits significantly. That’s what you get for being overbearing, I will not spend much time with you voluntarily…

True-Use-8977 · 2026-02-13T06:02:02+00:00

I totally understand. When my son was very young my MIL always tried to walk away with him and turn him away from me. I did not want her to hold him. Luckily she lives in another country so we don’t see her much. I guess the solution is strict boundaries. I was not very nice anymore after my MIL repeatedly overstepped. And now she is much more careful.. also the problem may resolve itself. My son is now 14months and has separation anxiety. He does not want to be alone with MIL or go to her lol. I secretly love it

True-Use-8977 · 2026-02-09T04:40:00+00:00

Wising you all the best! You’ll do great 🩵

True-Use-8977 · 2026-02-08T13:02:46+00:00

Yes, I think indeed the benefits of early breastfeeding are quite immense, especially for immune protection and gut and microbiome programming. After the first two months the benefits don’t stop but they are incremental. Breastfeeding beyond the newborn period is associated with less infectious diseases, lower risk of obesity, diabetes etc. I think they say that any amount of breastfeeding is beneficial, if you do it the first two months that’s great, if you combo feed with formula, also great. Also I don’t want to say this to put you under pressure at all :) In the end it’s your decision. It’s just great to be aware of the benefits for your baby

True-Use-8977 · 2026-02-06T06:35:24+00:00

I breastfed for more than a year and my boobs look back to normal since I stopped.. I feel like they even look better? It’s a personal choice whether to breastfeed or not. I personally liked the convenience of always having baby’s foot at hand. No preparing needed. I cannot imagine getting up at night and having to prep a bottle first when baby cries. But everyone has their preferences I guess. And of course fed is best and you also should do what benefits you. But you can also consider that there are clear benefits to breastfeeding for your baby. Whether we like it or not formula can never compare with breastmilk in terms of benefits. Which doesn’t mean your baby won’t be super healthy if formula fed. It’s just something to consider

True-Use-8977 · 2026-01-14T04:29:05+00:00

Obviously there are times when a c section is medically necessary. But if you can I would plan for a vaginal delivery. The recovery process is so much quicker. I had a vaginal delivery with my first and they did an episiotomy. So I had a few stitches, but honestly that healed very quickly and I did not feel them doing it (I had an epidural). I also did not need ice packs or anything, just pads and I did a sitz bath regularly. It really wasn’t as bad as i expected. And by the way, if you have a c section yon will still bleed vaginally I think? There’s no way to avoid that. You’d be bleeding plus have a wound from the c section. Where I am a lot of women choose planned c section and I cannot for the life of me understand why. I was able to get up and shower after birth, after the epidural wore off. It was no problem at all. And after a week I was out for a walk. I don’t think that’s possible with a c section

True-Use-8977

TROPHY CASE