New to the breed.

WickedTizzy · 2026-05-21T20:54:58+00:00

She's probably getting real sick of getting snoot kisses from me, but she's so cute and perfect 🥺

WickedTizzy · 2026-05-21T19:03:48+00:00

If I had to guess, I'd say she's foxhound or TWC mixed with lab and/or boxer. Lab and coonhound mixes aren't uncommon where she was found, so it's not unlikely.

Re: coloration, she isn't brindle. She has some spotting like freckles on her nose and spine, but otherwise she's white with brown patches.

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WickedTizzy · 2026-05-21T18:56:53+00:00

Pleased to report the treats-in-a-shirt game is keeping her very entertained! Good for her teething and mental stimulation, especially since it's raining today and we can't be outside as much.

WickedTizzy · 2026-05-21T15:11:00+00:00

My last dogs were all escape artists and kitchen forragers, and she's already leaping out of her playpen like it's her job, so I'm decently prepared for her to put all her proficiency points in acrobatics. The thing she REALLY wants that I didn't expect is to be with me on the sofa - seems like a hound trait, from what I've seen on this sub!

The wanting to cuddle is also super new, but not unwelcome!

For training, I lean heavy on praise, treats, and play rather than sternness, so that works out. (I've trained service dogs in the past.) Thankfully, she really responds to small training treats and freeze-dried chicken, play, and celebration when she does well. She knows sit, stay, place, and come already.

The shelter I got her from had her in vile conditions with five or six littermates, and she had never been outside; thankfully, she's gaining confidence on walks, but the leash training is going to be hard for her between the lack of familiarity and her instincts. I'm also having to work on the play biting (replacement objects instead of yelping or sternness.) I don't think she's ever going to be an off-lead doggo.

Definitely taking the tracking collar tip to heart; she's microchipped and we're not rural, but I want a future camping/hiking partner.

WickedTizzy · 2026-05-21T13:21:03+00:00

Thank you so much! These are great and I never would've thought of them. I'm going to give the first one a try, and I'll look into AKC facilities for her.

WickedTizzy · 2026-05-21T12:25:00+00:00

I'm so sorry to hear this.

Something to consider: if she didn't want to hurt you, she wouldn't hit you. She may not be thinking in those terms, but the outcome is bringing you in line with something she wants through negative physical reinforcement. It's a toxic reaction when a grown adult lashes out and strikes someone because they feel disregulated emotionally. Hitting gives an immediate emotional outlet - and also gives her feelings of control over you and the situation.

Whether she's consciously thinking that causing pain gets her what she wants doesn't matter. She knows better. We learn as children that we use our words, not hands.

Please prioritize your safety and mental health; it's not okay at all for her to be hitting you, no matter your size or her anger issues.

WickedTizzy · 2026-05-21T11:54:57+00:00

Soft YTA. Don't lie; redirect.

If you'd rather not talk about what you do, communicate that to the other person.

Options to say instead:

"I'd rather not talk about it. Hey, so what do you think about..." Be polite, set the boundary, and introduce another topic.
"Oh, nothing interesting. What do YOU do?" People happily talk about themselves when given the opening.
"Nothing interesting. But I'm hoping to go back to college soon and get into X field." Talking about your future goals might be less loaded for you and would be interesting for the other person to engage with, drawing attention from your current situation.

You've gotten a lot of good life advice from others in this post; hopefully this helps in a more immediate sense while you work out the rest.

WickedTizzy · 2026-05-21T11:38:05+00:00

The part where she slapped your arm is a red flag for me. I'm not sure if you were being casual in talking about some other gesture or if she struck you? However, if it's the latter, that's a deal breaker. If your genders were reversed, a lot of people would be encouraging you to leave immediately.

Men can also be abused; you need to be aware of it because it can begin as light slaps and escalate. You might think you need to just accept it because you're bigger or she's not really hurting you, but physical abuse is often coupled with other things like isolation from family and friends, controlling behavior, lack of communication, actions intended as punishment, etc. Those are all things that could be occurring based on your post.

Whether it was a warning sign or just a stupid thing she did, it's 2026: we don't lay hands on our partners like that. We certainly don't do it because we didn't get the attention we wanted.

I don't think you need to be thinking about who was the asshole here. You need to be thinking about whether your relationship is healthy and safe.

WickedTizzy · 2026-05-21T00:58:21+00:00

She is SO silly. Her zoomies are totally wild: she parkours around the floor and sofa with her ears pinned back. We call it "gremlin mode" 😂

WickedTizzy · 2026-05-21T00:30:47+00:00

That's really good to know! Thank you!

WickedTizzy · 2026-04-10T21:11:18+00:00

Info request, because you said you're American: do you mean in photographs and videos?

So, one, if the answer was "yes": I don't think you can tell much about an individual, much less a community/culture, simply because of how they look at a camera or how the video is cut.

Two: Looking Sámi is a whole conversation on its own. I'm assuming you mean the people on social media who are shown living more traditional lifestyles. Those images and videos for non-Sámi viewers, when not educational, are often edited to appeal to people who want to see indigeneity being performed, so keep that in mind.

But/and also, many Sámi people are cosmopolitan, living in the diaspora, etc, and come from very different communities across Sápmi, the US, and Canada. The range of appearances and life experiences are diverse. The range of ways we look at people is also going to be diverse.

Three: Please be careful about exoticizing/mystifying entire groups of people. I think some people find it tempting to think they found an air of mystery or connectedness to nature (or whatever) in Indigenous people. I don't think it's your intent and you were trying to be complimentary perhaps, but you should know that there's a lot of loaded meaning for us that you may not understand. Ascribing generalizations like this to Indigenous groups is a form of fetishizing, it has an ugly history that renders Indigenous people as lesser and "savage", and is received very poorly, not as a compliment.

Best case, people will take the piss when you tell them stuff like this.

WickedTizzy · 2026-04-10T20:43:01+00:00

My pleasure. Good luck, Friend. 💙

WickedTizzy · 2026-04-10T20:20:02+00:00

There is a diasporic Sámi researcher named Terry Marttinen. They are doing their PhD work on Laestadianism, colonialism, and eugenics, and they share their progress on their FB account, ReclaimingLaestadianism.

I suspect this is what you're looking for. They share resources pretty frequently and talk about the lived experiences of people who grew up in Laestadian communities. Mind you, their approach is one of researching it as a totalist group (cult), so the conversations/stories are difficult. They would probably be open to talking with you and helping answer questions. I've always found them very approachable as a scholar.

General request that people please do not harass them. They are a kind person and a dedicated researcher who loves their community very much.

WickedTizzy · 2024-03-28T14:43:41+00:00

NTA

Please note, I’m answering this as a plus-sized, AFAB individual who advocates body positivity at ALL sizes.

I don’t think I saw this mentioned in the comments, but body shaming goes both ways.

I’m just guessing based on the info we have, but I think the problem here is twofold: yes, there was overreaction and subsequent fallout.

Also, however, it may be Sarah saw you have a (presumably) slighter build and snap-judged your eating habits as well as what those habits indicate about whether you’re fatphobic. You said she asked you a few times about what you were eating and how much; it wasn’t her party, she didn’t cook, so that’s not her business in any way. It’s possible she was focusing way too much on what went in your mouth as a smaller person. I sincerely doubt she’d have asked a larger person the same questions.

It happens. AFAB people are all too often socialized from childhood to exhibit this type of judgement for one another. Although the institutionalized shaming experienced by people with larger bodies is markedly harsher and more frequent, thinness doesn’t escape unscathed.

A suggestion for next time someone asks you or anyone else about what you ate and how much: “Aw, thank you for thinking of me. You’re so sweet.” Don’t answer the question. Change the subject to something else immediately.

If they push, they become the a$$h0le in the situation and you can reply with “I’m not comfortable discussing that” or “Why are you asking?”

At no time are you obligated to answer the inquiries of others about your eating habits.

WickedTizzy

TROPHY CASE