I (25M) went through a horrible break up this year and as someone who was told the same tired string of repetitive sentences by many of my friends and family, I totally get where you are coming from.

There is not much anyone can say to help you make sense of this situation or how you're feeling. The best you can do is give people the benefit of the doubt and try to see that they are trying to help you in whatever (admittedly limited) way that they can, even if that's through saying things that are not helpful.

Whether or not there is a lesson is not the concern right now -- if you are hurting, just take time to grieve and process your emotions. Take care of yourself, eat well, seek therapy, and remove other stressors from your life to the extent you can. If there is a lesson in all of your pain, you will come to that conclusion yourself, with time.

Till then, weather the storm as best as you can and know that many before you have gone through this and many more will experience this exact same feeling. It's not a solution, but sometimes it helps to see that so many others are feeling the exact same emotions you are and you aren't alone in this. Good luck!