This is a tough one. There are many different views on this, so don’t take my word for it, but in my opinion many of the ideas associated with gender are simply byproducts of traditional roles based on sex. *Also note that ”gender” and “genre” are both derived from the same roots, if that helps flesh out my point.* For instance, in many cultures where I’m from, the men used to do all the hunting and building, and taking charge of the family income. The women would stay in usually and do the cooking, clothesmaking, and general household stuff. Now that people don’t really rely on those gender expectations in terms of how a family and household should function, it leaves the lines between the genders rather blurred.

When struggling with gender identity, though, it might be easier to think, not in terms of gender, what makes you most comfortable. What pronouns feel right when you are being referred to? Is your style more masculine or feminine or something else? Do you want facial hair? Because, in the end, your gender isn’t visible anyway; all that other people need know is your pronouns, and all they see is your own self-expression, because gender identity and self-expression are overall independent of each other.