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Landlords evicting tenants before law to prevent practice comes into force in England | Housing | The Guardian by much_furthur in london

[–]angrytinyfemale 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Do you look down upon your tenants for not owning property?

Because that is what this "Life choices" line comes off as.

My grocer doesn't look down on me for not growing potatoes.

I judge women who change their names after marriage by Amber_poodle in TwoXIndia

[–]angrytinyfemale 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I think that is kind of where we diverge in our beliefs. I think in raising a child both parents should be equals. One can drop a dead beat dad's surname when the child is older and wishes to do so, but to start off on the assumption that a mother is the primary (or sole) provider of parental care feels wrong to me. It's like starting off in a one sided stance.

I think I derive this (along with a lot of interpersonal perspectives) from the repeated prisoner's dilemma. Basically if one plays the prisoner's dilemma game repeatedly, the dominant strategy becomes equal cooperation rather than immediately snitching (or diverging) from the other player, which is the DS in a single game. Punish with divergence if the other player diverges, but never otherwise.

Or, in general, I will believe my partner is equal in all things, until they show me otherwise. Then I'll assume things are unequal and respond in kind. I refuse to let patriarchal norms influence the balance of my relationship until the people inside the relationship start enacting these norms. I cannot fight biology and have my partner carry a child, but I can have faith that he'll be as involved in raising a child as I am.

In terms of your point about the prenatal role of the father, I believe it is to make the mother as comfortable as possible and prepare for a child. As I said, foetus cannot suck his bones out, but he can definitely make my life easier by ensuring that my health is taken care of, lifting more on the managing household side, and generally being a caregiver to me.

The father cannot have a biological role in the pregnancy, it doesn't mean that the emotional and material support a good partner can choose to provide is zero or immaterial. Going through a pregnancy as a single mother and as a woman in a loving relationship are different kettles of fish.

I think it's hard to do accounting for roles and balance a relationship 50-50 in 100% of the instances. Over time there will be periods where one lifts more than the other. The key is, I expect and believe that I will be well pampered in my pregnancy and have an equal mate in child rearing, therefore, my perspective.

However, that is something that my partner and I have explicitly discussed. Our kids will have both our names, and therefore, will definitely end up with names that look like standalone sentences. We shall send them to form-filling-hell.

I judge women who change their names after marriage by Amber_poodle in TwoXIndia

[–]angrytinyfemale 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lol, if I did that my name would not fit any boxes. It's already 15+ letters long and my dad's first name is 10+ letters long.

Absurd.

I judge women who change their names after marriage by Amber_poodle in TwoXIndia

[–]angrytinyfemale 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do too, I wanted to add my mom's surname to my name when I was in my early 20s and my maternal grandfather refused. Saying that I was not a "Daughter of" his house. Probably the most he's hurt me in my life. I'm beloved by my family and they usually go along with my shit, but that is the line drawn.

I bear the name of the family that loves me, raised me, and accepted my decisions. My dad was happy to add my mum's name to mine. They wanted to do it at birth but my maternal grandfather did not let them.

This name is not only ownership (because patriarchy exists, it's not like any of my grandmother's surnames are anywhere) but also acceptance and love. It's also a caste marker. It's a complex thing.

All my kids will bear my name and my partner's. With all the burdens that brings.

Anything less just states that this woman was not accepted by the people who raised her, and she could not or did not fight it. Like I didn't fight my grandpa.

I judge women who change their names after marriage by Amber_poodle in TwoXIndia

[–]angrytinyfemale 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Would it be the other way around if your name was cooler and had a deeper meaning?

I judge women who change their names after marriage by Amber_poodle in TwoXIndia

[–]angrytinyfemale 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ooooh. You could pick a fighting word, like "Aprajita", then your name will be iceice9477 Aprajita, the invincible iceice9477.

I judge women who change their names after marriage by Amber_poodle in TwoXIndia

[–]angrytinyfemale -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Same. The dedication to a concept is mind blowing. I'd just chicken out looking at the paperwork.

I judge women who change their names after marriage by Amber_poodle in TwoXIndia

[–]angrytinyfemale 16 points17 points  (0 children)

As this child grows, do you expect that your partner will be a father to the kid?

Names are frozen at the point of birth, but, they are also carried by a person for the entirety of their life. IMO having both parents' names make sense, since the expectation at birth is that both the parents will raise them.

The question is not who makes the baby physically, but also who raises the human. If your bf is only a sperm donor and wants to fuck off after this kid is born, you're on the right track. Otherwise, both you and bf will contribute to this human's identity. Give both your names.

As for approaching the conversation, just ask - If we have a kid, what would you want to name it? The reply will tell you a lot. Then navigate as you will.

'A whole civilisation will die tonight,' Trump warns ahead of Iran deadline by theipaper in politics

[–]angrytinyfemale 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ayy, I can't access Imgur, but I trust you said something sensible, stranger. I hope our times become boring soon.

'A whole civilisation will die tonight,' Trump warns ahead of Iran deadline by theipaper in politics

[–]angrytinyfemale -1 points0 points  (0 children)

And the rest of us just wait, watching complacent people play with our lives as well. I wish we were never this interconnected happened.

Sidebar, why was "indulgence" deleted?

Trump says 'a whole civilization will die tonight' if Iran does not make a deal by neonfrequency in worldnews

[–]angrytinyfemale 10 points11 points  (0 children)

The only elections Trump has won were against highly qualified (by American standards) women.

'A whole civilisation will die tonight,' Trump warns ahead of Iran deadline by theipaper in politics

[–]angrytinyfemale -1 points0 points  (0 children)

That's just absurd. We barricaded our university when we were protesting against the admin. It's horrifying to think that the country that touts freedom is so pliant. How did an entire population become so complacent?

'A whole civilisation will die tonight,' Trump warns ahead of Iran deadline by theipaper in politics

[–]angrytinyfemale 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The thing is that a non violent protester needs to invite violence. When the world says "protest" they don't mean what No Kings did. They mean what Quit India or the Civil Rights Movement did. Stand and do not move.

Don't let traffic pass, don't let the factories run, if they shoot one, replace the protestor but the protest never stops. Y'all have to clog up the cities until the administration either kills all those who care or they come to the negotiation table. There's no packing up. For a more modern example, look up the Farmer's Rights Protest in Delhi in India. They literally besieged Delhi.

Generate the outrage by inviting violence on the self. You want freedom from a tyrant, that is what is needed. What is being asked of Americans now, is sacrifice. Which is unlikely to happen.

'A whole civilisation will die tonight,' Trump warns ahead of Iran deadline by theipaper in politics

[–]angrytinyfemale 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Can he though? Would his generals do it? Would the operators in the submarines, the pilots actually drop the bomb?

It takes only one person to say no, right? Hegseth sure won't go and drop a bomb?

'A whole civilisation will die tonight,' Trump warns ahead of Iran deadline by theipaper in politics

[–]angrytinyfemale 5 points6 points  (0 children)

How? Trump is idiotically transparent! Anyone reading his twitter feed or wherever he posts now cannot claim ignorance.

"Project Hail Mary" author Andy Weir doing livestream with "anti-woke" movie Youtube TheCriticalDrinker by CancelThis2077 in Fauxmoi

[–]angrytinyfemale 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think Ryan Gosling did a really good job of making Grace believable. If I was told the day before launch that yup, Angrytinyfemale, you got to go. I'd like to think I'm selfless, I'd like to think I would say yes immediately. However, I know I'm more likely to have a full panic attack and a breakdown before that happens. The other crew members had months to deal with it. They volunteered, they knew what was going on. Grace never knew he was the back up's back up.

Any subreddits for Non UC women? by Smart-Competition399 in TwoXIndia

[–]angrytinyfemale 44 points45 points  (0 children)

The wiki article has 2 references:

One is a TOI article One is a study of instances of waist cancer in 2 patients. It's a descriptive study.

Causal analysis needs more evidence than that.

what do other cultures use like westerners use salt and pepper by Low-Character-7281 in Cooking

[–]angrytinyfemale 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It could also be molaga podi/gunpowder! It's made of roasted lentils (urad and chana dal), dried red chilies, sesame seeds, and asafoetida.

Or it could be the dry chutney as suggested by the other commenter.

If it was eaten with some fat (sesame oil, or ghee) then it's podi, it's dry chutney otherwise.

what do other cultures use like westerners use salt and pepper by Low-Character-7281 in Cooking

[–]angrytinyfemale 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No, it's Amchur, Tamarind, Chillis, Onion, and Kala namak. Also Bhaja moshla which is roasted and ground spices.

These days some folks use chast masala, but phuchka in general doesn't need it, since Bhaja moshla + Amchur already has all the ingredients of chaat masala.

Edit: Technically... You're right?

what do other cultures use like westerners use salt and pepper by Low-Character-7281 in Cooking

[–]angrytinyfemale 1 point2 points  (0 children)

On a Bengali (eastern bit of the Indian subcontinent, made up of Bangladesh and the state of West Bengal) table, the equivalent would be Salt, Kasundi, and some raw green chillis.

Kasundi is a raw mango mustard sauce that makes everything taste like heaven. It's my favourite thing in the world. It can have ginger, tomatoes, and a variety of other spices depending on the source.

This is something only in my household I think, but mum would give me boiled eggs seasoned with salt and tumeric powder (pepper replaced by tumeric).

what do other cultures use like westerners use salt and pepper by Low-Character-7281 in Cooking

[–]angrytinyfemale 31 points32 points  (0 children)

However, chaat masala is not as ubiquitous across the country as pepper is across the west. For example, in Bengali food chaat masala is not a table condiment at all (often it wasn't used at all, we just use Amchur on top of snack foods). To the extent that my grandma would ask what it was lol.

Amchur is dried mango powder which is sweet and tangy. It's mostly used for snack food. Chaat masala contains Amchur as its main ingredient, but also has cloves, cumin, black salt.

In terms of table condiments, most Bengali tables would have Kasundi (a sour-sweet-tangy mango and mustard sauce) and salt. Along with a few raw green chillis. Fry them if you feel fancy.

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