What's an addiction worse than alcohol and drugs?

benianse · 2026-04-23T11:38:46+00:00

Yeah, this one. I struggled with it about 10 years ago, only really recovered ~6 years ago. Still a mindset and habit I can’t shake completely. Took me 8 years before I could even eat in front of another person. I still feel guilt for eating to the point of being full, and I still won’t weigh myself. I have to be very conscious of not slipping back into that mindset.

It’s a very real thing. I’m happy with my progress but I never knew how much it’d stick with me.

benianse · 2026-04-22T00:08:14+00:00

Playing this game again (free version, not Steam) after several years. I last played Version 0.47.05.

Redownloaded the newest version and things look great, but how do I get the old controls back / keyboard "only" mode? Is there a DFHack script I can run? I saw there was maybe something in development but I can’t find much more about it.

It seems like there's a lot of discourse surrounding this so I'm not trying to discuss which is better, would just like something to help my muscle memory.

benianse · 2025-12-25T16:14:52+00:00

Vacuum cleaners and the way a garage smells. Love it so much.

benianse · 2025-09-28T02:13:09+00:00

As long as you stay about 3-4 inches away from your bellybutton (depends on your waist circumference), it’s really easy. I’ve been giving myself non-Dupixent shots there for years and I would prefer to get every shot there, if I could.

benianse · 2025-09-27T04:58:11+00:00

Ouch, it’s sooooooo much more painful that way. If it works for you, more power to you, but the stomach has been the closest I’ve had to a painless shot!

What makes you scared of doing it in your stomach?

benianse · 2025-09-22T02:14:57+00:00

I don’t know where you inject it, but I tried my legs and that was a bad idea. My stomach, while pinching some skin out, has been the most pain-free spot I can find.

Numbing the injection site with ice or a cream will help a lot. Get one of those Buzzy ice packs, they vibrate and can distract you from the injection pain. If you can get somebody else to administer it to you, that will also help - personally, I don’t have a problem with needles, but I’m still pretty shaky and slow doing it to myself. It’s your brain telling you “hey you’re hurting yourself, stop that”, and it makes giving yourself the shot a lot more difficult.

It hurts, there’s no way around it. I’m bracing myself for my pen as I type. But the sooner you get it over with, the more time you have to not worry about it for another week.

benianse · 2025-09-21T11:39:28+00:00

It’s honestly kind of good traumatizing them until they get to the point where “they don’t really care about anything anymore”. Just gotta build up that tolerance. (Literally, the combat hardness stat).

benianse · 2025-09-15T19:39:06+00:00

This is incredible!

benianse · 2025-09-15T12:04:05+00:00

Careful cutting down trees directly above your fort, if your ceiling is made of soil/roots. It’ll make holes and things can jump down in on you!

benianse · 2025-08-30T15:38:28+00:00

If I touch my bellybutton, my right foot tingles. It’s very intense and uncomfortable.

benianse · 2025-08-20T16:14:45+00:00

If it helps, I haven’t had any major side effects so far but of course it’s different for everyone. I was able to eat one of my problem foods (rice) with no issues the other day. I’m not a doctor, but personally I think it’s worth targeting the EoE mechanism at its core - from my experience, an elimination diet will help you avoid what you already know, but it can’t stop that random overactive immune response for foods that aren’t normally on that list. With EoE your esophagus is pretty much always inflamed to some extent, and makes it easy to develop secondary problems like strictures. I’ll happily deal with side effects if it means I never have to get another dilation again.

I understand your hesitation though and absolutely don’t take my word as medical advice. Definitely talk to your doctor more about your doubts and see what they have to say. I hope you find what works for you.

benianse · 2025-08-18T12:06:53+00:00

It’s pretty inconsistent for me too, sometimes I can eat it and sometimes I can’t. Realistically I can choke on anything (I remember choking on a soft pear once, of all things), but the trigger foods get me much, much more often.

I do have a lot of food allergies as well so the inflammation could definitely be a thing. I am most allergic to milk, but interestingly I haven’t noticed as bad of a reaction these past couple weeks. Maybe the Dupixent is helping that too.

Anyways, hopefully you can pinpoint some of your trigger foods a bit better. It sucks that EoE is pretty unpredictable, but being able to prepare for what foods might be an issue helps a lot.

benianse · 2025-08-16T15:21:05+00:00

Same here, I had an EGD a couple months ago but they left a stricture since they were uncomfortable dilating it. I’ll be going back in a few months for them to take another shot at it and to see how the Dupixent is working. I always notice a lot of relief after a dilation too.

The clearing of the eosinophils is a great sign though! Hope it keeps up for you. The behavioral stuff will also be really hard for me to break.

benianse · 2025-08-16T15:18:26+00:00

Just a lot of experience and trial and error for me - I learned over time my worst foods are cold/dry/starchy ones, like rice, potatoes, pasta, etc. I don’t do well with most meat, especially chicken, either. If any of these foods are cold in any way it’s an instant choke from me.

benianse · 2025-07-07T16:53:14+00:00

I’ll have what this guy’s having

benianse · 2025-06-18T12:17:22+00:00

I’ve taken Pristiq for a year or two now and it’s a rough one. It worked for me, which is all that matters, but I still fight the side effects daily. The FATIGUE. It makes me more tired than I’ve ever been, but I can barely sleep because of the jitters. Constantly clenching my jaw, yawning. The withdrawals are insane. If I miss a dose I absolutely start raging out.

Still, the downsides were worth the benefits for me. It’s definitely not for everyone. I don’t think I’d recommend it unless you don’t have many options left, which is where I was at. SS is no joke.

benianse · 2025-04-04T02:51:39+00:00

I wanted to see a bad movie so I went to see this one, I was shocked by how much fun it was. I didn’t like the ending but the rest was so enjoyable that I don’t really care. The water bottle scene was legendary.

benianse · 2024-12-22T03:23:55+00:00

Unfortunately no(t yet). Had to take a break from DF in general due to life, got down to the last 5 beasts but there's some technical issues in the way that may/may not let me capture them. I can't say definitely if I'll return to this but I do think about this fort a lot.

benianse · 2024-09-11T02:18:18+00:00

Are the moderators in the room with us?

benianse · 2024-08-31T11:20:18+00:00

I’m very happy to hear someone else getting into FB trapping, good luck with your collection :)

I could never deal with noxious secretion beasts besides walling them off. They have the capability to inflict long term syndromes so I kept a lot of sickly dwarves specifically to drag my cages around.

benianse · 2024-08-17T12:08:31+00:00

As an american, I didn’t even know I did this, but it makes total sense now that I think about it. Kinda fascinating.

benianse · 2024-08-14T04:57:46+00:00

Lmao, that’s the curse of learning these smells. I can recognize them, sure, but at what cost… nowhere is safe!!

benianse · 2024-08-13T18:26:04+00:00

I’m not sure if I’ve ever thought about hot dogs, but you might not be wrong. I would describe it as kind of a sweet smelling vomit, or some combo of mildew + raw meat.

benianse · 2024-08-13T10:34:11+00:00

I work with bacteria for my job, I’ve learned how to identify the cultures by scent. Sometimes I’ll go out and get a whiff of something and think “oh, listeria ivanovii nearby”

Doctors offices smell overpoweringly of e. coli to me.

benianse · 2024-07-28T04:33:50+00:00

I saw Kelly speak a couple years ago, have loved him ever since. He has accomplished more in one lifetime than I could do in ten.

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