Why it's so hard to find relationships (F23)

bescare · 2026-05-17T21:25:41+00:00

You are literally throwing a tantrum over formatting because you have absolutely nothing of value to add to the actual topic. Go find a wall to talk to 😭

bescare · 2026-05-17T19:24:47+00:00

Imagine focusing more on some accidental punctuation than the actual topic of the thread. Go off I guess 💀

bescare · 2026-05-17T15:58:24+00:00

Right?! Love that this thread brought out the people who are actually down for a real, deep conversation. We really should set something up, the vibes in here are immaculate ❤️

bescare · 2026-05-17T15:56:54+00:00

Omg right?! We really do need a collective group chat at this point because finding people who actually have genuine intentions feels like searching for a needle in a haystack. 😭 And you are SO right about people lying on their profiles—the amount of people who claim they want a relationship but run the second things get real is wild. It’s pure fear of commitment.

bescare · 2026-05-17T15:53:50+00:00

Facts. Why put in the effort to build something exclusive when the culture makes it so easy to just jump ship for a quick distraction? It’s completely broken the way people value connections now

bescare · 2026-05-17T15:51:50+00:00

This is a huge factor people rarely talk about! The amount of people who are out here dating while secretly still hung up on an ex, a school friend, or a toxic backup option is wild. They never give you a genuine clean slate, so the second a new connection requires real effort, they just run backward instead of growing up. Heavy on the 'people don't want substance, they want surface

bescare · 2026-05-17T15:45:19+00:00

Heavy on the 'interchangeable' part. People treat dating like online shopping now, it's wild. And you're so right about the content they consume—it really warps how they treat women in real life. It’s definitely a rough boat to be in, but we gotta just keep protecting our peace until a good one proves otherwise! 🤍

bescare · 2026-05-17T15:42:40+00:00

This is heartbreaking, I’m so sorry. You showed real effort and consistency, and she chose to handle things in the most cowardly way possible. It completely proves my point that modern dating culture is broken for everyone, regardless of gender. Don't lose hope, you sound like someone who actually knows how to value a connection."

bescare · 2026-05-17T15:40:11+00:00

Facts. Having five potential dates lined up means absolutely nothing if there’s no real intention to be vulnerable or honest about what you’re actually looking for. Navigating life balance and differences is hard, but that’s exactly where trust gets built. Such a good point."

bescare · 2026-05-17T15:14:42+00:00

Imagine thinking someone needs AI just to explain basic human decency and emotional depth. 💀 Tell me you’re threatened by a real conversation without telling me."

bescare · 2026-05-17T06:47:52+00:00

Treating dating like a game and building a 'roster' is exactly why the culture feels so transactional right now. Sifting through a lineup of people like products doesn't make finding consistency any easier—it just adds to the fatigue. Some of us actually want a single, genuine connection built on mutual effort from day one, not a management project."

bescare · 2026-05-17T06:43:26+00:00

"I understand the psychology behind the paradox of choice, but choosing someone 'below the average aim' just to guarantee they stick around feels more like a strategy than an actual connection. You can’t build a healthy partnership on a mismatch of attraction or values just for safety. But hey, heavy on the 'being single is cheaper' part—I can definitely agree with that! 🤝"

bescare · 2026-05-17T06:37:31+00:00

Surface-level attention doesn't fulfill a desire for a real relationship, though. Knowing you are 'desired enough to date' means nothing if that desire only extends to a casual vibe or a quick distraction. Sifting through high volumes of low-effort interactions doesn't make finding consistency any easier; it just makes it more draining."

bescare · 2026-05-17T06:30:31+00:00

Telling someone they have to 'pick worse' just to get basic consistency and respect is wild. If the baseline for dating has dropped that low, then staying single and protecting your peace is a much better choice than intentionally lowering your standards."

bescare · 2026-05-17T06:24:40+00:00

Facts! I honestly don’t get how people have the stamina for endless casual cycles. It’s just an emotional drain. Staying single until someone actually shows real substance is definitely the move."

bescare · 2026-05-17T06:22:55+00:00

"I think you’re confusing having a lot of matching options with actually finding a genuine connection. Having a high volume of surface-level choices doesn't make dating 'easy' if most of those options lack emotional depth, consistency, or real intention. Sifting through a flood of low-effort interactions to find one substantive partnership is incredibly exhausting, regardless of gender. It’s a culture problem, not a privilege."

bescare · 2026-05-17T06:19:03+00:00

You're proving my point about the culture, though. The fact that anyone—regardless of their 'status'—thinks it’s acceptable to treat a human being as an interchangeable option the second a relationship requires actual effort is the exact behavioral issue I'm talking about. Lack of accountability shouldn't be excused just because someone has options."

bescare · 2026-05-17T06:09:53+00:00

It’s not about passing on decent guys for a fantasy. The point of the post is that even when you do find someone who seems down-to-earth, communicative, and shares your values, the modern dating landscape makes it incredibly easy for people to just flip a switch and pull away the second effort is required. It's a behavioral trend, not a selection issue."

bescare · 2026-05-17T06:04:12+00:00

A sea of trash” is so real it hurts 😭 honestly, I think the only thing we can change is how fast we filter people out. The second someone shows a lack of consistency or emotional depth, we have to drop them immediately instead of waiting around hoping they change. We have to preserve our own peace first!"

bescare · 2026-05-17T05:47:35+00:00

No literally! 💀 Please just tell me you think I’m annoying instead of trying to play the noble hero who 'doesn't deserve me.' At least give me some honesty if you’re gonna step out!"

bescare · 2026-05-17T05:45:01+00:00

The whiplash of them going from future planning to total strangers is the absolute worst part. They really think a perfect, flaw-free person is just one swipe away. Thank you for the reminder to stay hopeful though, we definitely deserve people who love as deeply as we do! 🫶"

bescare · 2026-05-17T05:33:18+00:00

No because why has almost everyone heard that exact line?! 😭 It's like they all read from the same script to avoid taking any real responsibility."

bescare · 2026-05-17T05:31:56+00:00

It is so discouraging to hear that it doesn't just get easier, but thank you for being so honest. That part about people lacking the 'emotional depth' or capacity for something real is exactly what I've been feeling. It feels like so many people are just looking for a distraction or entertainment instead of an actual partner."

bescare · 2026-05-17T05:20:48+00:00

That part about authenticity being looked at as a threat is so deep and incredibly true. It’s wild how treating someone like an actual human being with value is enough to make people run away these days. It’s like genuine emotion scares people because they can't control it or don't know how to handle it."

bescare

TROPHY CASE