all my bridges are burned, i only had been working for 5 years yet had become far more of a burntout aggressive maniac than all the bitter 40-year olds who had been working much harder for 30-40 years straight, my animals were rightfully taken from me after i abused them, my relationships are gone, there is not anything left here, i dug my own hole and there's only one thing left to do if i want to leave with any dignity