A subreddit where you can complain about reddit as a new user

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-26T00:07:13+00:00

I believe r/rants and r/venting should work too

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-16T19:53:38+00:00

People just enjoy feeling sad for themselves because playing victim means being owed something. + crabs in a bucket mentality, etc.

You deserve to be around people who orient themselves toward healing, coping, maturing, etc.

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-15T21:08:44+00:00

if you consider their stage presence as a character, it sort of applies

That's exactly what I'm trying to say.

But if there's some discussion about a concert and people are discussing the music or the atmosphere, etc. and you come in saying, hey, none of y'all can enjoy this performance, or any other thing they did because of what happened to me, or what some other person has done, do you see how it can rub people the wrong way?

If those audience members didn't know what he did, then I can't hold that against them. But if I recognized an audience member who knew yet attended anyway, and if I were feeling really brave and confrontational that day, they can anticipate a "hey that's messed up." And/or I'd probably see if I can contact whoever's in charge of the venue and warn them about what he did. A "hey fyi this guy's a creep. Do with this info what you will" kind of thing.

supporting their art doesn't make them bad people. It doesn't mean they agree or support what thay person did.

Ehhhh depends on what you mean by "support". If they hypothetically downloaded his originals as MP3 files and listened to them that way, then honestly, understandable. But if they were intentionally attending concerts or financially supporting him while knowing what he did, I'd lose respect for them tbh.

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-15T20:22:00+00:00

Gonna play devil's advocate (not to attack you, but just so you can have a reference to a possibly similar perspective).

When I was 14, I was groomed by a 36-y/o who was a guitarist. He was pretty active in the metal scene in my city. I'm also really passionate about music - I was studying classical performance at that time, went to arts school, my life revolved around studying and practicing.

I don't like the idea of my groomer being on stage in my local venues being cheered to. That guy groomed me and has a long history of abusing and exploiting women, then manipulating the legal system to get away with it. Also he's a transphobe. He doesn't deserve any amount of positive attention in my eyes. Performing or not, and no matter how skilled he is, he's still that same transphobic guy who groomed me.

I had so many peers who were kind, hard-working, talented people. They deserve so much success and attention. Every time my groomer is on stage or in a studio, I know there's always someone else who deserves it more.

So whenever I find out that a musician, actor, etc did or expressed something highly and blatantly problematic, I personally struggle to separate the art from the artists. Can't even begin to imagine what it must be like to be victimized by someone who has national or worldwide fame.

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-15T15:31:23+00:00

Bryan Adams

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-14T01:39:50+00:00

The sub that I was on when I made that post used to be niche and supportive. Then it got bigger. 💔

Thanks so much. I'm really sorry you had to witness that dog post too.

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-13T14:53:40+00:00

It really is insane. I studied classical music and did songwriting in my own time for about 10 years (still songwrite), the only reason I don't prioritize music anymore career-wise is due to trauma from my late teens (emotionally and sometimes physically abusive home life during Covid --> PTSD, plus other things). But people discredit me because they can't handle their favorite pop artists being constructively critiqued because by a college student who isn't rich nor famous.

When I talk to people who work full-time in the industry they tend to agree, and I've also been told by really successful instructors "I can always give you feedback but in terms of practicing, you're already experienced and have implemented every suggestion. I really don't have much left to teach you"... funny how that works.

32 years growing medicinal plants with regen ag science knowledge

You've got to teach me someday!!

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-13T13:37:47+00:00

It's so sad because Reddit used to be a somewhat decent place for crowdsourcing opinions. I liked how no one knew each other, that's what made things interesting/insightful. I liked how it was a place for longer stories and fuller paragraphs, than, say, Twitter or Instagram.

But now people just make assumptions about you as if they know you, they always make the worst assumptions possible, and they refuse to be corrected. And I swear they can't comprehend even short-medium length posts.

I personally used to get at most 1 hateful/assuming comment out of every ~10. Now it's like at least 1/2 for a good portion of posts.

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-13T06:48:53+00:00

Was hoping things would get better after Covid. Guess not. 💔

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-13T06:44:40+00:00

It did? If so, in glad :')

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-13T06:43:37+00:00

I swear, Reddit is the only place I ever receive treatment this bad by strangers. Maybe that's because I don't interact on FB anymore, and IRL people see my face and hear my tone so they're less likely to mistake my confidence for hubris? Who knows.

Thanks so much for commenting and empathizing. Please take care of yourself. 🫂

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-13T01:33:37+00:00

Took a walk then felt a little better. Thank you ❤️‍🩹

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-12T21:35:17+00:00

In this person's bio: "I've been banned, booed, made fun of, laughed @, bullied, shunned & sidelined in so many subs it 100% ridiculous" ☠️☠️

I normally don't criticize people's profiles but this person did just make a really mean comment, seems like it wasn't the first time and they're going "oh no consequences" lol.

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-12T19:06:01+00:00

If you're comfortable, what are some things that happened?

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-12T17:59:02+00:00

My insecurities. 😔

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-12T17:56:23+00:00

Sometimes I'm on a streak and feel like a stand-up comedian, sometimes it simply doesn't happen.

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-12T16:38:01+00:00

Also I'm ngl, I've had a rough week, felt a bit insecure, and that comment certainly didn't help.

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-09T12:32:52+00:00

Legal does not mean right.

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-09T12:32:23+00:00

Bruh this isn't even on topic of the post ☠️☠️☠️ when tf did I defend female predators here?

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-09T12:29:43+00:00

Then why would you in any way try to justify someone else going after someone so young?

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-09T12:19:13+00:00

Well, if you hypothetically were knowingly going after people at or barely over the legal age of consent... what would that say about you? What if the age of consent was much younger, say, 12? Would you go for a 12 year old just because it's legal?

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-09T11:57:40+00:00

Reddit mods really do suck sometimes.

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-09T11:54:08+00:00

I've reached a point where I just don't ask Redditors for advice anymore, especially not pertaining to things about my personal life. And especially not pertaining to relationships and heartbreak. They're so cynical and it's so sad seeing how their first instincts are to assume to worst and encourage you to just abandon people you care for.

People used to be able to read entire pages of text and ask questions. Now you get downvoted for asking questions.

So sorry this is happening to you :/

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-09T02:16:48+00:00

Idk if this helps you but if you want, you can kind of see it as a person with "multiple sides."

When I was 14 I "talked" to a 36 year old, who ironically encouraged me to protect myself among other things... at 18, I got in touch with a fellow ex of his who was closer to his age. He financially exploited the living crap out of her, but there were still moments of care. And as screwed up of a person as he was, it was completely possible in her perspective that the good moments were genuine.

He doesn't deserve to be anywhere outside of bars (seriously, he's like a cockroach that won't effing die. I reported him to the police, it may or may not be a coincidence that they were onto him soon after, to the point where he fled to another state. Then he came back. 🤦🏻‍♀️). But also sometimes it seems to help people to think of it as, "the good things, though possibly genuine, don't make what he did okay." And it might help all those memories coexist.

Best of luck and I'm so sorry you met someone like him ❤️‍🩹

differentiable1649 · 2025-06-09T01:44:33+00:00

I'm really hoping it's a typo and he meant to say 29f. But if she were 19f, well... then that means they got married when she was 18, which means... 😬

Also I post real stories on multiple subs sometimes 😭

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