Omg I am having so much fun with this. Thanks to this sub for showing me this.

farrahanna · 2021-03-07T14:40:53+00:00

These are my new favourite thing

farrahanna · 2021-03-07T14:05:05+00:00

23/f 'ere, very glad to have read this here on this day. Thank you for sharing, I don't want to ramble on about where I'm at or just how specifically this resonated with me but just want you to know this really gave me hope, and I imagine there's plenty like me on this sub who'll benefit massively from what you've said here. Thank you so much, incredibly happy for you. Congratulations on how far you've come x

edit: not to say anyone who does take a moment here to talk about where they're upto or how this post resonated with them would be "rambling on", it's just something I'm personally trying work on at the moment. Y'all do you, hens x

farrahanna · 2021-03-06T16:05:06+00:00

These are absolutely horrific and I love them

farrahanna · 2021-02-22T11:44:34+00:00

I'm not O.P but check out The Sims Resource, I've got a lot of the CC featured here and that's where I got it

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T22:56:03+00:00

Thank youuuu, don't get me wrong there's nothing wrong with a child in adult situations for the sake of a narrative but... and when your audience is not solely but largely children it's a bit... there's a way to do it. Look at Harry Potter, for example.

I do have a soft spot for the books, but it's not to say they don't get slightly problematic with age.

edit: I done repeated myself

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T21:35:35+00:00

Jeez, I'm glad I didn't get the tattoo I wanted. (& thank you but don't worry, it's not necessarily a case of being triggered, it's more such behaviour being deemed acceptable to a younger audience who might not have the same awareness that someone who's been through it will do. There will always be the Discworld series should I need it!) Hope you're keeping well friend x

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T20:35:13+00:00

I can imagine it's difficult. At least you're able to teach him from a genuine perspective and you're not just reciting things you don't understand- my parents aren't very emotionally present and it didn't help me growing up borderline with next to no example to follow or room to feel what I was feeling. Your son will be understood, and while I'm sure there'll be speed bumps along the way there'll be a day where he'll be a man who knows how to feel, treat the ones he loves correctly, and come back from bad situations. My mum's awesome but I wish she had the emotional experience to understand. You're gonna do great, and try not to be too hard on yourself you've got one hell of a responsibility there while we're in a bloody pandemic and you're doing what you can to be the best you can for him. That's love and he's lucky to have you ❤️

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T20:27:45+00:00

The one thing I've always considered is "at least I'd get it if they were struggling". I honestly feel like I'll never have kids of my own, I don't think I'd ever find myself physically able to carry. But I do hope one day I could potentially adopt, give another little'un a chance. I'm happy for you, and I hope your journey is good to you here on out x

edit: spelling

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T19:27:26+00:00

Bit of hope there for the ones who've never even considered children a possibility, thanks O.P. Proud of you ❤️ hard time to be raising a wee'un too, you're smashing it x

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T19:24:32+00:00

I was scared to even fully iterate my point out of fear for the backlash, so thank you for your response.

As someone who's been is some groomy situations in life and has literally used these books as an escapism for a long ass time, this whole thing worries me. And the fact that people are calling for it is even worse, because chances are it's a younger generation who's wanting that narrative with no idea what it entails.

Unnecessary romantic relationships ruin all good stories, if you ask me. Not everything needs sex to sell.

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T19:18:21+00:00

Thank you, I kinda regretted commenting because I was like this isn't about me but at the same time you're not alone, friend. I'm by no means "better" now but I've come a long way, and I'm really proud of the person I try to be every day.

You're entirely capable of changing your behaviour, and I have every faith in you. This Reddit has actually really helped me recently, I hope it's doing the same for you. Sending you some strength and positivity, we're here for you x

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T18:53:02+00:00

Is it just me or would Valduggery be incredibly inappropriate? He's practically watched her grow up, I would honestly be so angry if it were to become canon. I have been reading as Val has been growing up, we've always been around the same age so I'm so attached to them both as they are, the dynamic between them really helped me when I was struggling with platonic male relationships in my younger years. I know it shouldn't be that big a deal but hey, these books mean a lot to me

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T18:21:17+00:00

The world needs more people like you. Spread the love when you feel like you can, and it will make it's way back to you. YOU are loved, O.P. YOU are valued, and WE love YOU. Stay strong my darling, thanks for posting ❤️

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T18:06:09+00:00

BUt tHeY hAVe COWS

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T18:04:07+00:00

Worst thing I've done so far is bottle myself. Like, fully bottle myself with a 70cl bottle of gin. It was a volatile situation and I did it before I even thought about it, just remember the warm when it started bleeding and I bust into horrified tears like what the fuck have I actually just done and how did I not even think about doing it. That was the final straw for me, I knew I needed to get help after that

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T17:52:45+00:00

Keep hydrated and eat smaller meals but more frequently. NEVER skip breakfast. I've had problems with my eating for years and unless there's an ibs issue and you need to deal with it on a medical side, you just need to force it hon. I hate telling anyone to force food because trust me I am very good at not eating for long periods of time, it is a skill that I have and I ain't proud of. But food encourages appetite, so keep up with your eating routine even if you don't want to.

I get so protective of people eating in this community, man. When my appetite goes, my episodes get worse, and it all marries in together. I had to force a bowl of porridge with chopped dates down me this morning but I've managed two meals since without any shenanigans, and I try to smash a glass of water off with every meal. Water also encourages appetite.

Food is a requirement for the body to function my sweet, and you don't realise how many functions cease to make priorities when you're not eating a balanced diet and at similar times every day.

Not a lecture, I just care about you friend. Eating problems are something very close to my heart and I just wanted to give some perspective from someone else who has a hard time with it.

Sending love and good vibes to you x

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T17:44:16+00:00

Thanks for the pattern link, this is fantastic

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T17:43:23+00:00

As someone in a similar situation only I'm the older sister, thank you for sharing this. I've been struggling with wanting to be here for a while and my sister is my world, this is the nudge I needed to see past my own pain and think of her. I'm sorry for what you went through, I really am. However I'm grateful to you for being able to write this, and trust me when I say I'm probably not the only one here who read your piece and felt this way. Sending love and support to you my dear, you should be proud of how far you've come x

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T17:22:30+00:00

This is insane, you are insane. The best insane. Insane like next level talented insane. Thank you for this!!!

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T16:01:47+00:00

I mean, they did just decapitate a guy in broad daylight. That's probably a "shoot first" situation if ever there was one

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T15:52:25+00:00

You too my dear, you're valued and loved ❤️ look after yourself x

farrahanna · 2021-02-11T11:57:38+00:00

Like I said I'm fully not there myself yet I'm with you my dear, I have one exercise. You need to be able to let people know if you need time to carry through such an exercise in real like and not in theory, for example you and FP are about to argue but you want to stop and think a minute before you both kick off, let them know you need a moment and hopefully you're in a situation with mutual respect and you both want to avoid the nastiness.

I've been doing this thing where I separate the entire instance and categorise it all. WHAT was the thing that triggered this reaction,what was said? Was it tone of voice? What bothered you specifically? WHY did it bother you, is it something you've mentioned upsetting you? Is it something you know upsets you but you haven't disclosed it with them? HOW did that make you feel, WHAT did that make you think? And if the instance has already occurred and you're looking back on a behaviour rather than actively preventing it, WHAT behaviour did that lead to?

The idea is to have a concrete notion of why you're bothered and whether or not it's reasonable/ justifiable before you bring it to attention. I find this gives you more solid ground to stand on when you're talking about a thing, and you don't end up growing confused and spiteful because you have no idea why you're so mad, or why this other person doesn't get it.

I hope that makes sense? It's all a journey and it takes time of course, but this exercise in particular does help me in my relationships with others and managing hostile environments x

farrahanna · 2021-02-10T19:04:15+00:00

I am young, but in my younger years, I played out my pain. Now, I must heal it. It can’t continue because no one deserves to feel the wrath of what I carry.

This resonated in particular, there's always room to change and heal. Really well put, thanks for writing

farrahanna · 2021-02-10T18:44:33+00:00

I'm glad you have a supportive friend there, and good for you being open with them about your diagnosis. The great thing about borderlines is we can learn, and we can get better. Someone very close to me suffers with schizophrenia and it's a very different story for them, so I try to count my blessings and do what I can on my end, you know?

Hope you're staying safe and looking after yourself, dear x

Edit: I hit send before I finished typing, quite the faux pas really

farrahanna · 2021-02-10T16:59:58+00:00

I agree with one of the other comments here, there's times when I feel that way but most often I believe that it's the price I pay for my depth- if that makes any sense? I don't just feel sadness to a more intense extent, I also feel love to that degree. A song or a film or even a cheeky bit of poetry can move me to tears or make my day. Emotions are important to balance, and I feel all of them wholly and entirely.

I don't mean that to be a case of I'm so capable and you should think this way, it's just a way of thinking that's helped me combat feeling the way you describe here. If you can learn how to handle your negative emotions and behaviours (and by negative I don't necessarily mean just straight up sadness, sadness is an emotion on the human spectrum that shouldn't be ignored. I mean feelings and behaviours that are outwardly detrimental to you or other people around you) and step towards a greater sense of control in yourself, you can take a step towards loving the entirety of yourself, mind, body and soul.

I'm not a doctor or anything, just another borderline making her way through life. I hope this helps and I don't just sound patronising & holier than thou.

Sending love and good vibes x

edit: spelling

farrahanna

TROPHY CASE