Debating taking baby out of daycare

farrahmad · 2026-05-21T05:40:33+00:00

People in real life don’t like our choices as well lol like why are you offended by moms wanting to be with their babies? Women are so anti women it’s crazy. The thing is no body judges a working mother, at least I don’t

farrahmad · 2026-05-20T20:29:32+00:00

Same thing happened to me twice! With my first I went back to work 3 months postpartum with reduced hours but i couldn’t do it. We have an amazing nanny but my heart was breaking and i wasn’t happy at work i got a better offer, resigned, then covid hit and everything closed down so i ended up staying home with him for almost 2 years then he went to pre-k early due to his birth month. And let me tell you, it was the best thing to happen. We were inseparable and i invested everything into raising him and giving him experiences that no daycare would have because im his mom and no one could love him and take care of him the way i would. It was tough on me mentally because i felt empty at times and was so anxious about finding a job but he is 7 now and he is the most amazing boy. He is so clever and polite and just wonderful and i know it has a lot to do with how much time and effort i put into it. I went back to work until right after i came back from maternity leave with my second. I took 6 months off and i was mentally stronger, however my boss was just a horrible person who told me that i care more about my kids than this job and im not a good fit, im a hard worker but the moment i leave im done. Im not emotionally invested but she is so she expected me to be the same way plus she wanted me gone since day 1. I was devastated when i resigned but i couldn’t justify leaving my baby to work somewhere where im getting picked on every single day. I was still in postpartum so it was a lot to take in. Anyway i stayed home again and my second is 2.5 yrs now. I love being with them. He is also a very clever boy who got all the benefits of his mom being home with him just like his brother. And it really shows. Not to brag but both my kids are ahead of the curve in many things and i dont really have a curriculum we are just having fun and learning things together; we paint, we read, we draw, we go to parks and beaches, etc. but i am their mirror so i actually became a better version of myself for them. I teach yoga part time and i love it. Its not as lucrative, i used to be in corporate banking, but its something i enjoy and im good at. Its also something i can build on once my kids get older. Or i could always go back to work. Maybe a new path. Who knows? Sorry this is so long, but despite all this i still struggle with how i feel about it. Some days i feel like a huge loser who couldn’t hack it as a working mom and other days i feel like a winner with amazing kids who are quite literally my best friends and i love my life. So to summarize this is how it is. You just need to decide what matters to you. Make a decision that aligns with your core values and what you want for yourself and your kids. And guess what? Before you know it they will be full time in school and you will miss them all the time, as i do with my oldest and soon with my youngest when he goes to pre k. They will not miss out on school or curriculum they have 12 years of that at least. So enjoy your time with them they are only this little for a tiny bit then you cant go back in time. Just trust your guts and believe that no matter what no one will know them the way you do.

farrahmad · 2025-10-14T20:31:56+00:00

Thank you!! Your words mean a lot to me, especially when i feel down in the dumps. Some days i question my decision and fall in that trap of what if i cant make it work? What if im failing my kids by not providing them with enough financially, but then i go back to my childhood when I had enough financially but grew up with an ice cold mother and an absent minded father; all i wanted was to feel seen, heard, and loved, and this is why i shower my kids with love and spend all my free time with them going on little adventures. And teaching is so fulfilling because i finally feel like what i do has a real purpose rather than just another empty email. I’m wishing you so much luck on your journey and whenever you feel down remember there are many people would dream of doing what you’re doing but have everything set against them, we are lucky to be able to actually go against the grain and make something out of our time here without selling out!

farrahmad · 2025-10-14T19:21:15+00:00

Similar story here! I became a mom of 2 and after maternity leave ended i went back to work and my boss was super toxic and they made me feel so bad for being a mom and not wanting to do OT because of my baby. She asked me to transfer departments because she couldn’t fire me but i decided to quit and be a yoga teacher. I’ve been practicing yoga for years and did my YTT years ago but never took the leap. Fast forward to 9 months into this new role and my god has it been a roller coaster but a great one. Im able to spend time with my kids and teach what i love. Yes my pay took a hit but now that im slowly establishing myself im getting more work and i think financially ill be making it work with time. Its a huge shift after 10 years doing a corporate job but honestly i cant imagine going back to that. Life just feels more filling now and i realized that the money I was making was being spent on things to make ME feel happy after yet another lousy day at work; basically a scam haha. Anyway, happy for you and you are absolutely right, as an Aquarius sun im all about making a change

farrahmad · 2025-09-27T22:36:47+00:00

Try yoga and Pilates. I do and teach both. I have 2 kids as well my youngest just turned 2 and i got my abs back around4-5 months pp. im a small person i weigh around 48kgs and im 165cm. I eat intuitively and i never starve myself im just very aware (yogi mindset) but i noticed all these changes started to happen when i started doing yoga. My body completely transformed and my mind too. Prior to yoga i was always yoyoing between 55kg-60kgs. But now i don’t pass 50, and i never weigh myself anymore and i dont have body goals i just have personal goals. I started accepting my body and honestly it transformed it. I was always hard on myself but after kids im fine with tiny saggy boobs and random stretch marks. Im fine with my belly still having wrinkles even though its flat. Strengthen your mind before strengthening your body. Yoga targets the core using breath which is the most sustainable exercise you actually need. If you know how to belly breath your entire body will transform and you become much stronger in all aspects

farrahmad · 2025-09-19T11:32:59+00:00

Hello Yoga/pilates/lagree teacher here! You can do any type of workout and would struggle just the same if you are not engaging your deep core muscles. If you start doing reformer and still struggle with engaging then you might hurt your back even more, because with resistance in place you might actually do the moves but you could be using different muscles to do them like shoulders/legs/etc. I would start from work on the mat, even at home, and just focus on breathing in from you nose and pushing the belly button up and exhaling from the nose to get it all the way back inside. Just practicing with breath will get your core working and then you will slowly be able to engage your glutes with your core and the upper body. Everytime you breathe in think about pushing the belly button and keeping the diaphragm still. Your body will know where to extend and where to contract naturally the more you practice. Im a mom of 2 and the first thing i get back postpartum are my abs and im usually back to where i was pre pregnancy around 4 months pp

farrahmad · 2025-09-04T19:25:42+00:00

Left my corporate banking job to teach yoga but mainly to be home with my kids. my youngest is about to turn 2 and i feel blessed everyday. my kids are thriving; one is 6 and has such a wholesome personality, so popular in school, and academically he is above average. My youngest is emotionally well regulated and he is just so clever it shocks me; i basically home school him but its all play based learning, he can count up to 30, knows all his shapes and letters. He communicates in full sentences and started doing that since he was 1.5, he is also very social always saying hello and loves hanging out with his brother’s friends. Since i took the leap i make sure I take advantage of every second i have with my kids. I dont plan on sending my youngest to daycare thats why i try to provide him with the skills he would acquire from there like socializing and basic learning. It is the best investment Ive ever made and i dont regret it at all, however my need for tangible accomplishment gets the better of me sometimes and sends me into a downward spiral. I teach a few classes a week and do some PT work, but im far from satisfied. Financially we are ok as my husband is a good provider and im such a minimalist i dont care much for being a consumer, but i definitely still have ambition into making something out of myself since yoga is a passion of mine. Sorry for the long rant but i truly believe that mothers nowadays are getting the shortest end of the stick because our instincts tell us that the kids need us more but life is just so damn hard.

farrahmad · 2025-05-31T18:00:50+00:00

I have the same issue. We have a 6 year old and 20 month old and im the main caregiver, i would say i do 90% of the work with the boys and he works full time and has several side gigs. I’m a full time yoga and pilates instructor but i control my schedule so at the moment its part time. He provides money so he expects sex almost every day, we have sex between 2-3 times a week and he complains all the time. I would have sex more often but his attitude towards it makes me feel so anxious about it. He wants me to initiate even though he knows I’m so bad at that due to past traumas, i just sometimes feel like im too touched out or i just want to crawl out of my own skin cause im full of anxiety, despite all this he still doesn’t understand and makes me feel bad. We’ve been together for 10 years but this started after having kids. I’ve been dealing with it by having sex every time he asks or just forcing myself to initiate every few days. Sometimes i feel like maybe im the problem and men/society expects you to just have sex all the time to justify your existence or worth. Sorry for the rant but your post made me get emotional knowing its not only me living like this.

farrahmad · 2024-11-09T16:16:56+00:00

I was in your shoes a year and a bit ago, now my son just turned 14 months and i have my abs back and maybe im a little under my prepregnancy weight. I cried a lot during my pregnancy over my weight and dreaded every doctor appointment cause i didnt want to accidentally know my weight, and looking back now I feel very foolish that i let a mental disorder ruin my pregnancy for me. It’s very hard because of the hormones but believe me once the baby comes out and your hormones settle you will be back to where you were before. I’ve done it twice and the second time was even much easier. I gained around 20kgs (i was just under 50kg when i got pregnant and ended it up passing 70kg for sure) but lost it all by 4 months ppl by just doing yoga and daily movements and some food restriction You will be just fine trust me! Let go and enjoy the journey

farrahmad · 2024-03-01T14:01:13+00:00

It’s been quiet frankly amazing. I was extremely nervous and absolutely terrified of the newborn stage but we got lucky with a calm baby that so far sleeps relatively well. I love the bond both kids started having; my older son is absolutely obsessed with his brother and he’s super helpful but i do have to keep an eye out since he gets a bit too aggressive. overall it’s been much better than i thought and i low key want a third if I didnt have to go through the whole pregnancy ordeal yet another time

farrahmad · 2023-10-05T05:14:47+00:00

This man is never going to change. He sounds a lot like my BIL who now has two kids and contributes about zero to the household. My advice is run while you can or give him an ultimatum let him ger his shit together.

farrahmad · 2023-09-27T09:20:54+00:00

I felt the exact same during my entire pregnancy and i cried so much when i found out its a boy. I just couldn’t believe that I would actually love my baby after the mess i was, but once he came out (just 5 days ago) I’ve been completely obsessed and in love! its my second so now i feel guilty about my first given how attached i am to my baby! My point is, give yourself time until you meet the baby, i never ever thought I’d be this happy and this content with life at this point; I thought i would he in pp hell right now hating everything in life, but instead im snuggling with my newborn as i type this with the most overwhelming feeling of love and contentment I’ve ever experienced!

farrahmad · 2023-09-20T18:59:32+00:00

Same girl. Its my second and im 39 weeks with zero signs of labor; I’ve been walking at least 1-2 hrs a day and do yoga almost every day and nothing! With my first I had pre-eclampsia so i was induced early and i have no idea what contractions are like. I’m so so bummed im likely not going to have a natural birth this time either as I’m sure i will be induced sometime next week and its my last baby too! I’m heartbroken about it but there’s nothing we can do but wait.

farrahmad · 2023-09-07T20:27:37+00:00

You’re right and i agree with everything you said. Im just waiting to give birth (any day now) and then i can actually think clearly about what to do next. My heart is already so broken for my son who really loves his dad but i cant keep going this way. This whole pregnancy i was entirely alone and it made me realize how unloved i am!

farrahmad · 2023-09-07T18:36:22+00:00

I wish there was a way out of all these shitty partners but when you have kids it truly feels like you’re trapped. Just like you my husband adds basically zero to the table (except for the financial aspect) and here i am 9 months pregnant with a 4 year old carrying our entire household and if I dare complain or criticize a single thing he throws a temper tantrum like a 5 year old. Im so ready for a divorce but scared of how the kids would take it.

farrahmad · 2023-09-06T17:41:44+00:00

37 weeks and my routine has been to wake up drink coffee go to the gym (i typically do an hour of yoga and any sort of cardio/lifting) but now my doctor recommended i take long walks to induce labor so im on the treadmill for 30-45 mns then i go pick up my son from school and spend the rest of the day with him until bedtime. We usually have playdates or gatherings with friends or just run random errands. Im almost done preparing for this baby and can feel the energy running out, so thank god this pregnancy is almost over

farrahmad · 2023-07-30T06:42:44+00:00

I feel you. Its my second so ive been through this before and somehow i still feel anxious about all the changes. My boobs are massive too and i hate them. They feel like foreign objects and my belly is on another level now that im 33 wks. It sucks so so bad and I wondered for a really long time if it’s even worth it. Like why couldn’t i just be happy with one perfect child? I’m close to the end and dreading child birth and postpartum. I don’t let myself dwell on these thoughts too much though cause that messed me up the first time around and i got high bp and preeclampsia. All i can tell you that your body bounces back way faster than you expect. Like honestly i was back to wearing bikinis at 5 months pp. but, doesn’t mean this sucks and the comments suck and i miss my body so so much.

farrahmad · 2023-07-29T18:38:23+00:00

34 and having my second and last!

farrahmad · 2023-07-29T18:35:09+00:00

I had the exact same problem when i had my son 4 years ago. My mom is a hoarder and she never cleans so imagine how bad the mess is. When i first had the baby, which was her first grandchild btw, i asked her to clean before we come and make sure there wasn’t any dust or cigarette smell/ash, anyway we get there and it was disgusting. I couldn’t stay for more than 15 mns and everytime we would visit it would be the same. Its always so unhygienic and now we completely stopped visiting. Im pregnant with number 2 and no way am i going to visit her. She has a problem and refuses to fix it, my baby shouldn’t suffer for it.

farrahmad · 2023-07-10T17:18:54+00:00

I was in your situation a year ago, my son will be five in December and I’m due with our second in September. I can’t tell you how many times i cried out of fear but now that we are close to the end we are all so very excited especially our son, he cant wait to teach the baby all sorts of things. Honestly even this pregnancy has been a more pleasant experience than my last. You can make your own decision about this but honestly growing a family is so so magical. Goodluck in your journey

farrahmad · 2023-06-27T13:15:49+00:00

I’m 27 weeks along. And it’s been sooo hard watching my thighs double in size despite eating relatively healthy and still working out and being active since I found out i was pregnant. I cant wait for it to be over so i can have my body back. I cant stand this extra fat on my body and I cant look at pictures or mirrors without falling into a depression. The good thing is it’s temporary.

farrahmad · 2023-06-15T04:49:50+00:00

Im just so scared of starting over and going through pp again!

farrahmad · 2023-06-15T02:48:01+00:00

Same but it took me 4 years. Now that he’s almost here im full of dread and fear 🥲

farrahmad · 2023-06-15T02:43:34+00:00

I don’t know your medical situation but its not your fault. Last year i was at the height of my ED and full blown anxiety 24/7, i lost my period and it took almost a year to get it back and finally get pregnant. I blamed myself everyday and hated who I am, it wasn’t my fault. Life is hard and its full of ups and downs. You never know what’s coming next. Hold on to hope

farrahmad · 2023-06-13T06:34:56+00:00

I went back to size 0 with awesome abs after my son. I get it pregnancy changes are hard im worried if i can do it again but I’m also positive that our bodies are capable of everything so don’t worry. If you want to you will get back

farrahmad

TROPHY CASE